


Falling Slowly

by clexawarrior



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bisexual Female Character, F/F, Falling In Love, Hurt/Comfort, Injury Recovery, Lesbian Character, Romance, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-01
Updated: 2016-06-30
Packaged: 2018-05-24 04:14:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 72,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6141160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clexawarrior/pseuds/clexawarrior
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What if Clarke had escaped from Roan when he caught her outside of the trading post, and he never had the chance to bring her to the commander? Then, I guess the commander would have to go looking for Clarke herself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction ever. I really love Clexa, so I decided to give it a try.  
> Warning: There is violence included in this chapter.  
> I hope you all enjoy the story!

Lexa had been following the tracks for days now, looking for Wanheda. She got word from Roan of Azgeda that he had captured Clarke at the trading post a few days ago, but she had escaped, and Lexa had been tracking her ever since. She could hear the crackling of a fire up ahead, and the smoke that permeated the air stung her eyes. She knew that it had to have been Clarke who started this fire, and as it was still day time, she figured Clarke must have been cooking something. When she got to the edge of the clearing, she froze. There was Clarke, her hair back to its original blond, stamping out the fire, probably meaning to leave the clearing. However, before she could, Lexa emerged from the trees.

“Hello, Clarke,” Lexa said, carefully avoiding the term Wanheda, as she knew it would probably upset the other girl.

Clarke stopped in her tracks, eyes widening as if she were seeing a ghost. Clarke blinked, but Lexa did not vanish. Clarke’s face set in a scowl. Then, she was pulling her sword from its sheath and coming at Lexa with it. 

“You left me all alone at the mountain. You left me to die,” Clarke snarled, stopping in front of Lexa, “You forced me to kill all those people!”

“I did what I had to do. For my people,” Lexa said, careful not to let any signs of emotion onto her face.

“So why are you here? Shouldn’t you be with your people?” Clarke asked.

“I left Indra in charge of my people. She knows I may be a while. I am here to ask you to return to your people or to accompany me back to Polis. It’s not safe out here. The Ice Queen wants your power and is looking for you,” Lexa explained.

“So why do you care? Why not just let me die?” Clarke asked.

“Because I do care, Clarke. I care about you, and I want you to be safe,” Lexa said.

“Yeah, well it didn’t look like it when you left me standing in front of that mountain. It’s too late, Lexa. You’ve already made your choice, and I hate you for it,” Clarke growled.

“Clarke, please,” Lexa said, allowing a little of her love for the blonde to show in her eyes.

She hoped this tiny show of emotion would get through to Clarke, but it didn’t. It just seemed to fuel her anger.

“No. You don’t get to pretend you still care. You made it quite clear that you don’t. I want you to feel the pain that I felt. I will not come back with you because I’m going to kill you,” Clarke said darkly.

Clarke immediately slashed her sword as if to cut off Lexa’s head, but Lexa was ready, grabbing her own sword with lightning speed and blocking Clarke’s attempt. Clarke was fierce and a better fighter than Lexa expected, but she was no match for the commander. Lexa refused to attack, choosing only to defend herself because she did not wish to hurt Clarke. At the realization of this, Clarke swung with more force, and there was more anger behind every swing. 

“Fight back!” Clarke screamed, eyes sparking with fury, “Don’t just defend! Fight back!”

Lexa refused to fight back however as she hoped that Clarke would break at some point, and the Clarke she knew would come out. As they fought on and on though, Lexa became less and less hopeful that this would happen. She even allowed Clarke to slash her arm once to see if this would break through to her and bring back the old Clarke, the Clarke that hated hurting people. The slash only seemed to encourage Clarke though, her face twisting up into a wicked grin, a dark glee written all over it. Clarke continued to yell at Lexa to fight back, and Lexa eventually decided to give in, thinking that this might be able to break the blonde out of her bloodthirsty haze. She swooped her sword down to scratch along the lower half of Clarke’s left leg, careful not to cut too deep. Clarke, not expecting this, turned to the left a bit, shielding her leg but making it easy for Lexa to get behind her and slice down her back. Lexa gasped a little and pulled back as she realized her sword had gone a bit deeper than she intended, and the blonde doubled over in pain. Lexa backed off immediately, afraid she had severely injured the blonde, and that’s when Clarke lunged for her, catching her completely off guard, and smashing the hilt of her sword hard into Lexa’s jaw. Lexa cried out in pain, and Clarke reared back her arm and did it again, driving her sword hilt hard into Lexa’s face. Lexa could feel her jawbone shattering. She grabbed Clarke by the waist and shoved her away before collapsing against a low-hanging branch of the tree behind her. She leaned back against the branch, hoping against hope that Clarke would just leave her be, but this was not the case. Clarke wasted no time in hurrying to Lexa’s side and rubbing her fingers against Lexa’s jaw. Lexa bit down hard, but she could not help crying out in pain. The minute she did, Clarke’s hand was in Lexa’s mouth, pulling roughly on the side of the jawbone she broke. Searing pain shot through Lexa’s jaw, making it feel as if it were on fire as Clarke ruthlessly tugged it sideways. Lexa screamed again, unable to stop the tears from pouring down her cheeks as she begged for Clarke to stop. Clarke just laughed mercilessly, her cold fury and her brokenness clear in the sound, taking immense joy in the commander’s every scream.

“This is what you deserve, Lexa,” Clarke whispered in her ear, “You destroyed me, and you deserve to die a very painful death for it.”

“Stop, Clarke! Beja, Clarke! Stop!” Lexa cried.

Lexa knew she could not get Clarke away from her without seriously harming the blonde. All she could do was hope that her pleas would get through to the angry girl in front of her. Clarke reluctantly removed her hand from Lexa’s mouth and backed away, glaring at Lexa as the tears streamed down the brunette’s face.

“Fine. I hope you have a nice time dying,” Clarke sneered.

She threw Lexa roughly to the ground before leaving, causing Lexa to cry out one more time, which is probably exactly what she wanted to hear. Lexa knew this, and she freely gave it while she lied defenseless in the grass. Lexa curled onto her side, the uninjured side of her face pressed against the grass, as Clarke walked away. She knew she should get up and try to get back to her people, so they could help her, but she didn’t want them to see how weak she had been, how she had gotten severely injured by an opponent who was no match for her all because she let her guard down for a moment to worry about the blonde. Plus, she didn’t want her people to go after Clarke because of this. She knew they would want her dead if they ever heard what happened. Lexa would probably die out here on her own, but she didn’t care. She could not stand the thought of living with the memory of Clarke’s hate-filled gaze any longer. So she just lied in the grass, watching as the girl she loved walked away from her this time. She normally wouldn’t let herself hope, but as she would probably die anyway, she hoped that Clarke might come to her senses and realize what she had done, that Clarke might come back to her. Her heart almost stopped when she saw Clarke freeze in her tracks and turn back towards her. Lexa held her breath as she watched the conflict in Clarke’s blue eyes. She could tell Clarke wanted to find joy in what she had done, but she could also see the genuine concern that was fighting its way through. Clarke began to walk back to her, and Lexa wanted to melt into her arms, but she also knew that Clarke could be coming back to finish what she’d started. This could all be a ploy to get Lexa to trust her so that she could laugh in the brunette’s face. Lexa pushed herself up immediately into a sitting position, scooting away from Clarke, wary.

“Lexa?” Clarke asked, and it sounded like her Clarke, but she couldn’t be sure it wasn’t a trick.

Lexa tried to back further away, but she was overwhelmed by the blinding pain that was still coursing through her jawbone, and she collapsed back onto her side. Clarke wandered over to her, crouching down beside her, and made as if to touch her face, or hit her, Lexa still wasn’t sure. Lexa flinched away, and a tear fell from Clarke’s eye.

“Lexa, please. I didn’t mean to,” she said, starting to cry.

Lexa realized that this was it. Her Clarke had finally broken through and replaced the person that she had become in the days since the mountain. That’s when Lexa softened her gaze and brought her eyes to rest on Clarke’s. Clarke reached out a tentative hand, and Lexa gave a slight nod, finally allowing Clarke permission to touch her. Clarke immediately lifted Lexa’s head into her lap, and Lexa sunk into Clarke as the blonde cried.

“I’m so sorry, Lexa. I’m so, so sorry,” she sobbed, “What have I done? I didn’t mean to. I promise, I didn’t mean to.”

Lexa opened her mouth to tell Clarke that it was okay. She wasn’t mad, and she understood, but this slight movement sent fresh pain rocketing through her jaw, and she cried out, a few tears slipping from her own eyes.

“Shh, it’s okay,” Clarke’s hands were immediately stroking Lexa’s hair, “Don’t try to talk. It’ll only hurt more.”

Lexa nodded to show she understood, and Clarke took a shaky breath, wiping the tears from her face.

“I’m so sorry, Lexa,” Clarke apologized again, “You must hate me now.”

Lexa was quick to shake her head, wanting the blonde to know that she would never hate her. 

“I understand,” Lexa managed to get out between clenched teeth.

“I know,” Clarke admitted, “I wish I could be as strong as you. I know if the roles were reversed, and the Mountain Men offered me that deal, I would’ve done the same thing. I would’ve taken it. And yet, I spent all this time hating you, for what? Nothing. But still you understand my rage, even though it is uncalled for, and I don’t deserve it. Your understanding.  You have been nothing but kind to me, and look at the way I repaid you. I hurt you. Your poor jaw.”

Clarke ran her hand over Lexa’s jaw as she said this, and Lexa hissed in pain. Clarke drew her hand back from Lexa’s face like she had been burned.

“I’m sorry, Lexa!” she said, starting to freak out again.

Lexa brought her hand up to squeeze Clarke’s knee, letting her know that it was okay. Anything Clarke did would always be okay to Lexa. That was the thing. Lexa had never felt this way before about anyone, not even Costia, and she wanted nothing more than for the blonde to just stay with her. They were quiet for a moment, Clarke’s hands returning to run through Lexa’s hair, as she was seemingly lost in thought, and Lexa tried to focus on that soothing movement rather than the pain that was coursing through her face.

“Lexa, we should go back to the cave I’ve been staying in. We’ll be safer there. Like you said, everyone is hunting me. Are you okay to walk?” Clarke asked.

Lexa nodded, and Clarke nodded back. Clarke helped Lexa sit up before getting to her feet and helping Lexa to hers as well. Clarke led the way, and Lexa followed her through the trees. Lexa felt a little lightheaded, and she hoped this cave was not far away. Before long, Clarke dropped back to walk beside Lexa.

“Can I hold your hand?” Clarke asked shyly.

Lexa nodded, allowing Clarke to slip her hand into hers and intertwine their fingers. Lexa wondered if Clarke was still feeling guilty and wanted to comfort Lexa, but then Lexa realized that Clarke asked to hold her hand to comfort herself, to reassure herself that she wasn’t alone anymore and that Lexa didn’t hate her, even after all she’d done. Lexa squeezed Clarke’s hand in hers.

* * *

 

When they reached the cave, Clarke got a fire going for light because it was getting dark outside. While she was doing this, Lexa looked around. There was a bow and quiver of arrows in the corner and some fur laid out on the floor, but other than that, the cave was bare. Lexa realized that this was just a temporary shelter for Clarke as she was passing through. She wondered where the blonde had intended to settle down or if she even did at all. Lexa was torn from her thoughts when Clarke moved back over to her, sitting in front of her to look at her face.

“It’s worse than I thought,” she admitted, “I don’t how to treat this. I need my mom. I’ll have to go back to my people.”

Lexa shook her head, trying to tell Clarke she didn’t have to do that for her.

“Lexa, I have to fix this. You have a huge bruise on your cheek, and it’s already really swollen, and it’s all my fault. You need medicine, and my mom’s the best doctor we have. She’ll know what to do to heal you. You shouldn’t be in pain anymore because of me,” Clarke said, “I’ll go now. If I leave now, I can make it there around dawn. I’ll get back as soon as I can.”

Lexa’s eyes widened in fear, and she shook her head again, trying to protest. She didn’t want Clarke to go out there all on her own. What if the Ice Queen found her?

“I’ll be fine, Lexa. I haven’t gotten caught so far, have I?” Clarke asked.

Lexa raised an eyebrow at her.

“Okay, but that was one of your warriors. I won’t get caught by the Ice Nation. I promise,” Clarke said.

Lexa knew it was a promise that Clarke might not be able to keep, but she gave in anyway, nodding her head.

“That’s not the only reason you don’t want me to leave. You’re afraid to stay here alone while you’re hurt,” Clarke realized, and Lexa wondered how Clarke could have possibly known that.

“Don’t worry, Lexa. I’ll be back before you know it. Just get some rest,” Clarke said gently.

Lexa lied on the furs that Clarke had on the floor, and Clarke pulled another one over her. Only when her head hit the furs did Lexa realize how exhausted she was, and she was already drifting off to sleep as Clarke slipped out of the cave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments are much appreciated.


	2. Chapter 2

       

Abby Griffin awoke to the sound of someone knocking on her door. She wondered who it could possibly be, but she knew it must be urgent if they were waking her up so early. She opened the door to find Jackson, and she knew that there must be a medical emergency.

"What is it, Jackson? Is someone hurt?" Abby asked.

"No. It's Clarke. She just showed up here looking for you," he explained.

"Clarke?" Abby asked, shocked.

"Yes. We've got her in the medical bay. She's been injured. Not badly, but she still needs to be tended to, and she keeps insisting that she needs to talk to you," Jackson said.

Just like that, Abby was out the door, not bothering to change out of her pajamas, running to the medical bay. When she got there, she saw Clarke waiting for her. She ran over to inspect her daughter, noticing a scratch on her legs that could've been an accident, a scrape from a bush or stray tree branch, and a gash on her back that had to have come from a knife or a sword.

"Clarke, are you okay? What happened?" Abby asked, immediately grabbing her supplies to clean Clarke's wounds.

"No, Mom, we don't have time for this. You have to come with me," Clarke insisted.

"Clarke, we are not going anywhere until I've treated your wounds. Who did this to you?" Abby asked.

Clarke huffed and looked down, avoiding Abby's gaze, and this only further sparked Abby's curiosity.

"Clarke?" Abby prompted, and Clarke finally looked up.

"It was Lexa," Clarke admitted.

"The commander? You saw her?" Abby asked, and Clarke nodded.

Fury boiled in Abby's blood. First, the commander left her daughter to die at the mountain, even though they had an alliance, and now she had attacked Clarke in the woods? She had crossed a line, and Abby wanted nothing more than to find her and make her pay for what she had done to her daughter. What had Clarke ever done to her?

"Clarke, I'm sorry. That girl is nothing but trouble. I wish I could make her pay for everything she's put you through," Abby said.

Clarke looked taken aback when Abby said this, as if it was unexpected for Abby to want to protect her daughter. There was something else in her gaze too. A hint of fear?

"Mom, you can't say that," Clarke said.

"Honey, I won't really go after her. I know what the grounders would do if I did," Abby reassured.

"No, Mom. That's exactly what I need you to do. Go after her," Clarke clarified, "I know where she is, but I don't want you to hurt her. I need you to heal her."

"Heal her? Why would I ever want to help her?"

"Because I hurt her. I attacked her in the woods, and the only reason she even attacked me is because I kept screaming at her to fight back, and she finally gave in. The gash on my back was an accident. She didn't mean to cut that deep, and she backed away as soon as it happened, afraid she had really hurt me, and I took advantage of that. I hurt her badly, Mom, and I didn't mean to, and I need you to help me fix it," Clarke said, bordering on hysterical.

"And you're afraid the grounders will come after you if they find out?"

"You have to help her, Mom. You have to."

Clarke was sobbing as she said this, and Abby's heart broke a bit. She didn't understand why Clarke was so upset about this. Maybe she was afraid the grounders would kill her, or maybe she was still just broken from the mountain, hating the monster she believed she had become, but either way, Abby gave in as she applied Clarke's final bandage. "Alright, Clarke. I will come with you to help the commander."

"Thank you," Clarke sighed, relieved.

"Would you mind telling me what is wrong with her, so I know what supplies to bring?" Abby asked.

"I think I—I think I broke her jawbone," Clarke stuttered.

"That'll take a while to heal. Do you intend to stay with her all that time?" Abby asked.

"Yes," Clarke said.

"Okay then, I'll pack some extra clothes for you as well, and perhaps some soap and towels," Abby said thoughtfully, "I'll go get dressed and get what I need, and then we can go."

Clarke nodded gratefully as Abby headed back to her room.

* * *

 

Abby rejoined Clarke in new clothes with her bag of supplies slung over her shoulder. She noticed that Clarke had changed into fresh clothes as well.

"You ready to go?" Abby asked.

Clarke just responded by jumping to her feet and practically running out of the camp. Abby followed her out of Arkadia and into the forest beyond. Clarke was quiet the whole way there, and Abby could practically feel the nervous energy radiating off the other girl. She wondered if maybe Clarke was afraid that Lexa would be dead when they arrived. Abby hoped, for her daughter's sanity, that she was not.

In the late afternoon, they arrived at a cave that was carved into the side of a cliff. Clarke had hung some fur across the entrance, presumably to camouflage it or keep animals out. Clarke pulled the fur aside, and Abby followed her inside where she noticed Lexa laying on the ground on a bed of furs. She was shivering, and Clarke was instantly by her side.

"Lexa? Lexa?! She's shaking! Why's she shaking?" Clarke asked.

"She probably has a fever, honey. Her wound must be infected," Abby explained.

She moved over to inspect the commander's bruised, bloody, and swollen jaw. It looked like a nasty wound, definitely broken, but it didn't look infected.

"It's not her jaw. Is she wounded anywhere else?" Abby asked.

"Her arm. I cut her arm," Clarke said, pulling Lexa's arm up for her mother to see.

Abby noticed that the flesh around the cut was swollen and had turned an angry red color, and she knew that this was it.

"It's her arm," Abby confirmed, turning to open her bag.

As she pulled out a bottle of rubbing alcohol and a cloth, she saw Clarke pull the commander's head into her lap and begin stroking her hair. She wondered what it was that possessed Clarke to do this, but she decided not to question her daughter right now. She poured the alcohol onto the cloth and began to clean Lexa's wound. The commander whimpered in pain, but she did not wake up from her sleep. Abby quickly cleaned the wound, applied a salve that Nyko had taught her how to make, and bandaged up the brunette's arm.

"Could you set Lexa down, please? I need to clean the wound on her jaw, and it will be hard for me to do with her on your lap," Abby said, keeping her voice gentle so as not to upset the other girl.

"You can't do that," Clarke protested, "I barely brushed against it yesterday, and it hurt her."

"Clarke, I need to clean the wound, or it will get infected just like the other one. If you didn't want to see her get hurt, you shouldn't have hurt her in the first place," Abby said, exasperatedly, losing her patience as her daughter worried over someone she should hate.

"I know. I'm sorry," Clarke said, gently transferring Lexa's head to Abby's lap.

Abby reapplied more alcohol to the cloth, but the minute she touched Lexa's jaw, Lexa's eyes jolted open, and she sat up, bringing her hand to her face. Clarke instantly pulled Lexa against her chest and murmured soothingly in her ear. "Lexa, you have a fever. The wound on your arm got infected, but my mom cleaned it. She needs to clean the wound on you face too, or it could get infected. I know it hurts, Lexa, but you need to let her do this."

Lexa nodded against Clarke's chest and lied back down in Abby's lap, nodding at her to continue her cleaning. Abby marveled at how Clarke was able to calm the commander down so easily, but she let it go for now. Abby pressed the cloth to Lexa's face, trying to be as gentle as she could, so as to keep the commander's pain to a minimum. Lexa tried her best not to cry out, having figured out that that would only make the pain worse. Once Abby had applied the salve, she turned to Clarke. "I'm not going to put a bandage on because that will only irritate her wound. Just make sure you keep it as clean as you can."

"Okay, are you going to fix it now?" Clarke asked.

"I can give her some of the medicine, but I'll save what I really need to do until morning. Let's give her time to get over her fever first," Abby reasoned.

She reached into her bag and pulled out a bottle of medicine, pouring it into a clear vial with measurements on the side. She was about to give it to Lexa when Clarke took it from her, insisting that she be the one to do it. Clarke helped Lexa sit up, and she held the vial to Lexa's lips. Lexa dutifully drank it until it was all gone.

"Now what?" Clarke asked.

"Now, you two should get some rest, and that means you as well, Clarke. I can see you're exhausted. And I will go down to the river and prepare a nice cool cloth to hold against Lexa's forehead to help bring her fever down," Abby explained.

"Mom, I'll do it," Clarke insisted.

"Clarke," Abby warned.

"Mom, I did this. I have to take care of her," Clarke said.

She gestured for Lexa to lay down, and Lexa gave her a pointed look.

"Okay, fine. I'll rest," Clarke relented, and Abby was amazed that she gave in to Lexa when she wouldn't give in to her mother.

"But I'm going to wait until I get the cloth, and I'm going to rest against the wall, so I can hold the cloth to your forehead while I sleep," Clarke said.

Lexa seemed to think this was a fair deal because she nodded and began to move her furs over by the wall. Clarke sat next to her, and Lexa pulled the furs tightly over herself, clearly still feeling cold. Clarke gestured to her lap, and Lexa dutifully laid her head on the blonde's legs. Abby watched them curiously for a moment before going down to the river to collect water, purifying it before pouring it onto the cloth and bringing it back to the cave. When she got back, she found the commander fast asleep and her daughter still awake of course, waiting for the cloth. Clarke took the cloth from her mother and pressed it to Lexa's forehead. The commander stirred in her sleep, moving her hand to grab onto Clarke's knee, and Clarke smiled at her.

"Clarke, she's asleep now. You should get some rest. I'll take care of her," Abby tried one more time.

"No. I'm fine. I don't need to be laying down to rest. Besides, she likes it. Laying in my lap. She'd never admit that out loud, but I think it makes her feel safe," Clarke mused, looking down at the sleeping girl.

Abby decided not to argue with her anymore, but she could not help but notice the gentle tone of voice Clarke used when she talked about the commander, and she wondered, not for the first time, if something was going on between the commander and her daughter. She knew not to push it though, especially with Clarke so on edge lately, so she just curled up on the other side of the cave and went to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed the second chapter. Thanks for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

       

Clarke blinked her eyes open the next morning to see that she was still clutching the cloth in her hand, and it was still pressed against Lexa's forehead. It was still wet, which meant that her mom must have taken it back to the river while she was sleeping. She peeled the cloth back and laid it on the floor beside her, pressing her hand lightly to Lexa's forehead. She was relieved to find that it was back to its normal temperature. Lexa's eyes fluttered open, as she was seemingly roused by the feel of Clarke's hand. She looked as if she was about to say something as her eyes focused on Clarke's, so Clarke gently cupped the uninjured right side of Lexa's chin, reminding Lexa not to talk. Lexa pushed herself up into a sitting position and looked across the cave at Clarke's mother, and Clarke followed her gaze. Her mother was rooting around in her big black bag, getting ready to start whatever procedure she had planned for Lexa.

"Good morning," Abby said, "If you're ready, we can get started right away."

Lexa gave Abby a questioning look, and Clarke could tell her mother didn't understand, so she translated. "She wants to know what you will be doing."

"You two seem to know each other quite well," Abby commented.

"We spent a lot of time together planning our war with the mountain," Clarke said.

Abby didn't look as if she fully believed this, but to Clarke's relief, she didn't question it any further. "As for what I will be doing, it's important for Lexa not to move her jaw while it heals, so I will be wiring her mouth shut."

Lexa instantly turned to Clarke with wide, frightened, green eyes as if to say: _Please don't let her do that to me._

"Mom, you can't do that. How will she eat?" Clarke asked.

"With this," Abby said, pulling out a straw, "I also found a blender in the mountain, so you can go out and gather berries for her, grind them up, and she can drink them with the straw. As for water, I brought a canteen for you to use to collect it in. Just please make sure you purify it first. I brought many straws for you to use, and I even brought extra batteries for the blender. Medicine once a day, and no strenuous activity."

"Poor Lexa," Clarke murmured, almost to herself, staring at the ground in front of her. "I'm so sorry you have to go through this, Lexa."

Lexa reached over and grabbed her hand, squeezing it gently. Clarke knew Lexa meant it as reassurance, but she didn't feel any better. She still couldn't bring herself to meet Lexa's eyes. Not after what she'd done. She made Lexa weak, the one thing Lexa hated to be, and she didn't know if she could ever forgive herself.

"How can you be so calm about this?" Clarke asked, "She's going to wire your mouth shut! It's all my fault. All of this is my fault."

That's when Lexa reached up and cupped Clarke's face with her hand, forcing Clarke to look at her, and Clarke could read it in her eyes as if she'd said it aloud: _I forgive you._ Clarke brought her hand up to hold Lexa's where it rested against her cheek. Abby cleared her throat, breaking them out of their moment. They immediately dropped their hands back to their sides, embarrassed, and Lexa turned to Abby and nodded, giving her permission to start the procedure.

"You're really going to do this?" Clarke asked.

Lexa nodded, and Clarke knew as well as Lexa did that it was the only way.

"Just be careful with her," Clarke told her mother, and Abby nodded.

Clarke let Lexa hold her hand as Abby began attaching the wires to Lexa's teeth. She started on the uninjured side of Lexa's face, and Lexa did not let her pain show, if she even felt any at all. Clarke knew nothing about this kind of procedure. However, when Abby reached the side of Lexa's face that was bruised and swollen, Lexa could not hold back her whimpers of pain, and tears streamed down her cheeks as she squeezed Clarke's hand tightly. Clarke knew Lexa hated herself for it, for letting herself cry in front of Clarke's mother, and that just made Clarke hate herself that much more. It was all her fault that Lexa had to go through this, even if Lexa forgave her for it. She attacked Lexa. She broke Lexa's jaw. Now, she was the reason that Lexa was in so much pain, she couldn't hold back her tears. Also, Lexa was afraid. Clarke could see it in her eyes. She was terrified, and that was all Clarke's fault too. Clarke hurt the person she loved more than anything else in the world, all because she blamed her for a decision _she_ had made. A decision that Lexa really had nothing to do with. Even though Lexa was the one who left, it was Clarke's decision, and Clarke's decision alone, to pull that lever. Clarke wondered how Abby stayed so calm as Lexa cried out in pain over and over again. The sight was breaking Clarke's heart, and she wasn't even the one performing the procedure. The minute Abby was finished, Clarke barely had time to let out a sigh of relief before Lexa was slumping against her. Clarke pulled Lexa into her lap, rocking her gently as Lexa cried into the side of her neck. Clarke could tell that these tears weren't from the pain. They were tears of frustration. Frustration that Abby had seen her so weak and frustration that she was going to have to go the next several weeks without being able to speak or eat proper food. Clarke held her as she cried, soothingly rubbing circles on her back. She would've held Lexa all night if that's what Lexa had wanted, knowing she owed her that and so much more, but Lexa pulled back after a few minutes, wiping away the tears on the good side of her face.

"Are you okay, Lexa?" Abby asked, looking sympathetic.

Clarke knew Abby had hated the brunette before they had come, but even Abby's heart was starting to break for the girl in her daughter's lap, finally seeing the commander for what she was. Human. Lexa nodded to Abby, and Abby stood up, leaving her bag with the medical supplies for Clarke.

"I'm going to head back to Arkadia then. My people need me. Just don't forget everything I told you, Clarke. The blender for food. Don't forget to purify the water before drinking. Medicine once a day. Oh, I almost forgot," Abby said, pulling something that resembled a pair of scissors from the bag, "If Lexa ever starts choking, don't hesitate to use these. Cut through the wires as fast as you can, so she doesn't suffocate. It's not a big deal if you do have to do this. Just make sure you put the wires back on as soon as you can. I've left you some extras. You know how to do it?"

Clarke nodded, confident after watching Abby do it. She only hoped she never had to and was honestly a bit worried at the prospect of Lexa choking, but she didn't let that worry show.

"Okay, good. I'll come back in two weeks to check on her progress. Goodbye, sweetheart," Abby said, coming over to hug her.

"Bye, Mom," Clarke said.

Once her mother was gone, Clarke turned to Lexa. "I'm going to go get some berries for you to eat. You haven't eaten since you found me. I'm sure you're hungry."

Lexa's stomach rumbled as if on cue, causing a laugh to escape from Clarke. Lexa even cracked a small smile. Clarke told Lexa to stay in the cave, and then she went outside in search of some raspberries. Clarke remembered that Lexa had mentioned once that raspberries were her favorite kind of berries, so Clarke made it her mission to find some for the other girl. After a while, she found a bush with the small red berries, filling the glass container from the blender with them, and by the time she got back to her cave, the sunset was already streaking the sky with orange. She made her way up to the rocky path to the cave where she found Lexa waiting for her. She put the jar back onto the blender, pulling several of the berries out for herself, and turned the blender on. Clarke turned back to look at Lexa who was smiling at the sight of the raspberries.

"I remember you saying that they're your favorite," Clarke explained.

Lexa dipped her head in gratitude. Then, she pointed at Clarke, shooting the blonde a curious look.

"What am I going to eat?" Clarke guessed, and Lexa nodded, pleased that the other girl had understood.

"I'm just going to eat these berries I set aside for myself," Clarke said, gesturing to the pile of raspberries beside her.

The brunette gave her a disapproving look.

"I'm not eating meat. You can't eat it, so I'm not going to bring it in here and taunt you with it. If you can't have it, I can't have it, seeing as I'm the reason you can't have it in the first place," Clarke said with finality, leaving no room for argument.

Lexa gave in, and Clarke started the blender, letting it mash up the berries while she ate her raspberries. Lexa watched in awe as it whirred to life.

"Pretty cool, huh?" Clarke said.

Lexa nodded, in awe of this technology she had never seen before, and Clarke smiled at the adorable girl beside her. When the blender was finished, Clarke put her last handful of raspberries into her mouth and removed the lid from the blender, sticking a straw in it. She brought the blender jar over to where Lexa sat and held it up to her, guiding the straw to Lexa's lips. Lexa took a few tentative sips, but then pulled away, looking to Clarke with a mixture of fear and frustration. Clarke understood right away, and she was glad she had gotten so close to the commander before the mountain. Lexa was having trouble swallowing. Whether it was from the pain or from Lexa not being used to having her mouth wired shut, Clarke didn't know, but she wasted no time in reaching her hand up to rub soothingly along Lexa's throat until the other girl finally swallowed. Lexa bowed her head, ashamed, and a tear escaped her eye. Clarke quickly caught it, wiping it away, and she tilted the brunette's head back up to look her in the eye.

"Lexa, I know you feel weak right now, and you hate it, but I'm the only one to see it, and I don't care. I don't care if you're weak, Lexa. It's alright to be weak every once in a while, okay? I will never think anything less of you because of it," Clarke promised.

Lexa held her gaze a moment longer, seemingly searching her eyes to see if Clarke meant it, but Clarke did mean it, and Lexa nodded.

"If you need help swallowing, that's okay, Lexa," Clarke said, grabbing Lexa's hand, "If you need me to rub your throat again, just squeeze my hand."

At the dip of Lexa's head, Clarke brought the drink back up to Lexa's lips. Every time she felt Lexa squeeze, Clarke gently rubbed her fingers up and down the commander's throat, helping her to swallow, and soon, the drink was gone. Next, Clarke gave Lexa her medicine, and then Clarke brought over her mother's canteen, allowing the brunette to wash it all down with some water. She was swallowing much better now, and Clarke was glad. After Lexa was done, Clarke took a few swigs from the canteen herself. Out of her peripheral vision, she noticed Lexa draw her arms around herself.

"Are you cold?" Clarke asked, and Lexa nodded.

"Hold on. I'll get a fire going," Clarke said.

She walked over to the fire pit at the center of the cave and cursed herself for not asking her mother to bring more matches with her. Only two more peeked out of the box. Before she could strike a match though, she felt the commander at her side, nudging her out of the way. Lexa picked up a smaller stick, rubbing it back and forth across a large piece of firewood, expertly starting a fire, even though it took a bit longer than just using a match. Clarke watched in awe as the fire sparked to life in front of her, dancing before her eyes. As she sat beside Lexa in front of the warm flames, Lexa laid her head on Clarke's shoulder. Clarke looped her arm around Lexa's waist, drawing Lexa into her so that the other girl's head rested against her chest. Within seconds, the commander was asleep. She looked so peaceful that Clarke couldn't help pressing a light kiss against her forehead. She was finally free from her pain as her face smoothed out with the comfort of sleep. Clarke felt terrible that she was the one who hurt Lexa, that she was the cause of Lexa's pain, but Clarke knew she had to stop beating herself up about it. She knew that she just needed to be there for Lexa, and as she stared into the crackling flames in front of her, she vowed to take care of Lexa the best she could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading! I hope you enjoyed the new chapter. Hopefully this helps a bit with what happened on Thursday, even though I know nothing can really make up for that. If you ever want to talk to me about Lexa or this story, you can find me on tumblr at clexawarrior.


	4. Chapter 4

         

"So, how do you feel about a bath?" Clarke asked the next day.

Lexa nodded emphatically, indicating that she would very much like a bath.

"Okay, my mom said she put soap in here somewhere. Ah, here it is," Clarke said, pulling out the soap along with some towels and washcloths.

"She also packed clean clothes if you'd like some," Clarke said, offering them to the brunette who took them gratefully.

Clarke stepped out of the cave and into the sunlight, Lexa following close behind her, as they headed down to the river. As Clarke hadn't bathed in a couple days, she could not wait to get into the refreshing water of the river and feel it wash away the grime that covered her skin. When they reached the riverbank, Clarke put her stuff down on a rock and began peeling off her clothes. She tried her hardest not to stare as Lexa did the same. Once their clothes and bandages were off, they entered the river. The water felt icy against Clarke's calves, and she stopped to get used to the water temperature, watching as Lexa just plunged right in. Lexa noticed that Clarke did not follow and turned questioning green eyes on her.

"It's cold," Clarke explained.

Lexa made her way back over to Clarke, and Clarke was not sure she liked the smirk on the other girl's face. Lexa proceeded to grab Clarke's arm and pull her farther into the river. Clarke tried to stand her ground, but Lexa was too strong, pulling Clarke out deeper into the cold water. Clarke screamed as she felt the chilly temperature of the water hit her everywhere at once like tiny needles in her skin. When Clarke felt the bottom of the river slope down beneath her, she clung desperately to Lexa, "Stop, Lexa. I can't swim!"

Lexa only gave her an amused smirk and stood up. Clarke felt her face flush with embarrassment when she noticed that the water barely came up to Lexa's chest. If Lexa could have laughed right then, she probably would have. Clarke glared at her.

"I knew that. I was just messing around," Clarke tried to defend herself.

Lexa gave her a knowing look, and Clarke flicked tiny droplets of water across the commander's face. Lexa's lips turned up in a smile as she sent a wall of water flying over Clarke's head, soaking her with the freezing liquid. Clarke tried to splash back, but Lexa was already out of range, swimming out into the deep parts of the river where she knew Clarke could not follow.

"That is so unfair! You know I can't swim," Clarke said, "You're cheating."

Lexa only shrugged back at her, and it brought a smile to Clarke's face to see this playful side of the other girl. Clarke turned back, knowing there was nothing else she could do, and went to grab her washcloth and soap, so she could start washing herself.

"Come on, Lexa," Clarke said, "Game's over."

Lexa just shook her head, refusing to come back towards the shore.

"Lexa, I swear to God, if you don't come up here and start washing yourself, I will leave you here, and then you'll have no one to take care of you," Clarke threatened, but Lexa did not seem to care, making no move to come closer.

"Lexa, I mean it. I will take my mother's medicine bag too, and then you'll have no medicine and nothing to grind up your food, and your mouth will stay wired shut forever," Clarke tried again, keeping her voice light so the brunette knew she was only teasing.

Lexa rolled her eyes and gave in, making her way to Clarke and grabbing her washcloth with a pout. Clarke could not help but smile again at this childish side of the commander that she had never seen before. She knew she wouldn't mind seeing it more often.

"Can I wash your face?" Clarke asked, and Lexa nodded, handing her the washcloth.

Clarke gathered some soap onto it and gently scrubbed Lexa's face, starting with the right side. When she put pressure on the left side though, Lexa yelped, and Clarke immediately backed away. Lexa shook her head and pointed back to her face, and Clarke realized that the brunette didn't make that sound on purpose, and she wanted Clarke to ignore any future sounds she made. Clarke rubbed the washcloth over Lexa's cheek as quickly as she could to keep Lexa's pain to a minimum. After washing the soap off of the washcloth, Clarke proceeded to wipe the soap off the good half of Lexa's face.

"Just let the river's current rinse off the other side," Clarke instructed, and Lexa obliged, dunking her face underwater until most of the soap was gone.

Clarke handed Lexa's washcloth back to her, and Clarke and Lexa began to wash themselves, sharing the soap, but turning away from each other so as to give the other a small bit of privacy. Once they were all washed up, Clarke let her hair fall from where it was tied at the back of her head and leaned back in the river, allowing the cool water to rinse out her hair. Clarke watched as Lexa unwove the intricate braids in her hair before leaning back and doing the same. Clarke had never seen Lexa's hair loose like that before, and she couldn't help but admire how beautiful it was. Once they were all finished, Clarke made her way to shore and pulled her towel around herself before holding Lexa's out for her. Lexa stepped into the soft towel, and Clarke gently wrapped it around her. Once they were dry and dressed, the two girls headed back to the cave to reapply their bandages. They applied Nyko's salve to their reachable wounds before Lexa moved to rub the salve onto the wound on Clarke's back. Clarke winced as she felt the sting of the salve against her injury. She could read the sorrow on Lexa's face as she bandaged up the wound, obviously feeling guilty that she hurt the blonde.

"Lexa, no," Clarke said, "If I'm not allowed to feel guilty about what I did to you, then you can't feel guilty about hurting me. Besides, what you did to me is nothing compared to what I did to you."

Lexa was eager to change the subject, not wanting the blonde to feel guilty again, so she pointed to the salve and gestured to the wound on her face. Clarke dipped her fingers into the salve and rubbed it into Lexa's swollen flesh, much to the brunette's discomfort. Once she was finished, Clarke used the water from the canteen to rinse the salve off her hands, and she ran it over Lexa's hands as well, so she could do the same.

"When I go down to get food, I'll have to get more water too," Clarke made a mental note.

Clarke tied her hair back the way she always did, and then Lexa pointed questioningly at her own hair.

"You want me to braid your hair?" Clarke asked, and Lexa nodded.

"I will admit to knowing the way you always wear it," Clarke said, smiling at the blush that crept onto Lexa's cheeks.

Clarke moved behind Lexa's head and began to weave her hair into braids, trying her best to match Lexa's everyday hairstyle. It didn't come out exactly like Lexa always wore it, which was to be expected, but it was pretty close, and Clarke was proud of herself. Clarke moved away from her work, coming back to sit in front of Lexa "Okay, I'm done."

Lexa ran her hand over her hair and nodded appreciatively at Clarke, clearly impressed. Clarke beamed, blushing a little at the brunette's praise. As she was starting to feel a bit hungry, Clarke went over and pulled off the blender jar to go and collect some berries. She also grabbed the water canteen and purifier and began to make her way out of the cave when Lexa got up to follow her.

"Lexa, you don't have to come with me," Clarke said, but Lexa did not move, "Fine. I guess I could use an extra pair of hands."

They went down to the river first, and Clarke collected and purified the water while Lexa held the blender jar. Then, they went out in the woods in search of berries. When they came across a blackberry bush, Lexa started grabbing some and filling the container, so Clarke crouched down to help her. As she reached for the berries, Lexa's arm brushed against hers. The commander didn't seem to notice, but it made Clarke blush. She looked over at the other girl who was calmly plucking the berries off of the bush. Even with that horrible bruise on her face, she was still the most beautiful person Clarke had ever seen. Clarke wanted nothing more than to just lean over and kiss her, but she didn't. She didn't want to start anything with Lexa right now, as she knew that when this was all over, Lexa might just leave her again. Sure, Lexa was staying now while she was hurt and afraid, but she belonged to her people, and Clarke knew that. Still, an ever growing part of Clarke just wanted to ignore her doubts and tell Lexa she still loved her.

Lexa brought her hand up to rest against Clarke's cheek, snapping her out of her thoughts. Clarke looked down to see that the glass container was filled with blackberries, and she realized she must have just been staring at Lexa.

"Sorry, I was just thinking about something. Let's go," Clarke said, heading for the cave before Lexa could try to silently question her.

When they got settled, Clarke pulled aside a pile of berries for herself and began to eat them while she put the blender jar onto the blender again. Lexa rubbed her stomach, letting Clarke know she was hungry and to hurry. A smirk settled across Clarke's face as she turned to Lexa without starting the blender.

"What? Are you hungry, Lexa?" Clarke teased.

Lexa glared at her as she leaned over and started the blender herself, but Clarke wasn't going to give up that easily. She pulled one of her blackberries from the pile and waved it in front of Lexa's nose.

"Don't these blackberries smell good?" Clarke asked before popping it into her mouth, "Mm. Delicious."

Lexa whined pitifully, and Clarke laughed.

"Oh, calm down, Commander," Clarke said, eyes sparkling with amusement, "Yours'll be ready in a minute."

Lexa rolled her eyes and turned to stare longingly at the blender as if that would make it go any faster. When it was ready, Clarke grabbed the jar and took the lid off, putting a straw in and holding it out to Lexa. Clarke held onto the bottom of the jar and Lexa held onto the side to steady it, her other hand resting in Clarke's. She slurped ravenously on her blackberry smoothie, going way too fast, and Clarke wasn't surprised when Lexa was squeezing her hand moments later.

"Don't drink so fast," Clarke said as she rubbed her fingers up and down Lexa's throat, "I don't want you to choke."

Lexa swallowed easily with Clarke's help and nodded, taking it slower after that, swallowing on her own. Clarke could tell when she was getting tired or maybe swallowing was starting to hurt because for the last bit of the drink, Lexa squeezed Clarke's hand again. Clarke dutifully reached up to rub the brunette's throat so she could swallow.

"Do you want to stop?" Clarke asked, as there were only about two swallows left.

Lexa shook her head, and she looked a bit frustrated as she was seemingly searching for a way to tell Clarke something.

"Are you getting tired?" Clarke guessed, and Lexa shook her head again.

"Is it hurting?" Clarke tried again, and Lexa nodded, looking relieved.

"I'll help you with the last couple swallows," Clarke said, and Lexa nodded gratefully, taking another drink.

Once Lexa had slurped up the rest of the drink, Clarke patiently waited for her to swallow the last bit. Once Lexa was done, Clarke turned back to finish her blackberries, giving Lexa a little time to rest because she knew the brunette would not like what she was going to say next.

"So, how about that medicine?" Clarke said upon finishing her dinner, and Lexa shuddered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed having a more lighthearted chapter this time! Thanks for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

Lexa watched as Clarke left the cave to gather berries. She hated this. She hated having her mouth wired shut and having Clarke feel like it was her responsibility to take care of her. But most of all, she hated not being able to actually talk to Clarke. She couldn't tell Clarke how she felt, and she honestly really wanted to. She wanted to make sure Clarke knew she loved her, and she was curious to know if Clarke felt the same. At times, it seemed like she did, but sometimes, Lexa couldn't help but feel that Clarke was only so gentle and caring with her because she felt guilty that she'd hurt her. I mean, Lexa had betrayed her after all. How could Clarke ever trust her again?

Today, however, Lexa wasn't just going to sit back and let Clarke take care of her. She was going to do something for Clarke as well. Clarke deserved this after all she'd done for Lexa. Lexa grabbed Clarke's bow and quiver of arrows and made her way out into the forest. When she noticed footprints in the dirt, she carefully crept along the trail until she spotted a deer. She quietly pulled an arrow from her quiver and expertly nocked it on the bow. Taking aim, she pulled back the bowstring and released. The arrow shot in a perfect arc, landing in the deer's chest with a thunk. Lexa smiled to herself as she went to collect her prize.

When Lexa got back to the cave, she was pleased to see that Clarke was not back yet, and she got to work preparing the deer, cutting off pieces of meat with her hunting knife and roasting them over the fire one by one. The smell of the cooking meat made Lexa's mouth water and her stomach rumble, and she wished that she could eat real food again, but she knew she would not be able to chew it.

"What the hell are you doing?" Lexa heard, and she turned to face Clarke.

"Lexa, why would you torture yourself like this?" Clarke asked.

Lexa realized she must have had a pretty pitiful look on her face, so she quickly wiped it off and held out the meat to Clarke.

"No. I can't accept that. You can't eat meat, so neither can I," Clarke said.

Lexa pointed from Clarke to the berries to herself, and then she pointed from herself to the meat to Clarke, hoping Clarke would get the gist of what she meant to say: _You always make my food for me. Let me make yours for you._ Thankfully, Clarke seemed to understand, and she gave in, taking the meat on the stick from Lexa.

"Fine, but this better damn well be worth—God, that's so good," Clarke said as she tasted the meat.

Almost as soon as she'd said it, she looked guiltily over at Lexa. Lexa just nodded at her to continue eating, a small smile turning up the corners of her lips at the obvious pleasure the meat had brought the blonde. Clarke relished the meat, trying to savor every bite, and Lexa watched on, pleased that she was able to bring Clarke such delight. Once Clarke finished the meat, she turned back to Lexa, and the guilty look appeared on her face again.

"Oh, shit! I'm sorry, Lexa! I meant to make your berries. I just got caught up in the meat," Clarke said, moving to turn on the blender and grind up the wild strawberries she had found for Lexa.

Lexa put a hand on her shoulder, letting her know it was alright. Once the drink was ready, Clarke put a straw in it and held it up to Lexa's lips. Lexa hungrily slurped it down until it was all gone, and Clarke watched her with a thoughtful gaze, an emotion in her eyes that Lexa could not quite place. It almost looked like—but that couldn't be right. Lexa had to have been imagining things.

Once Lexa had taken her medicine, and they had both had their fill of water, Clarke turned to Lexa with a serious gaze, looking like she wanted to say something, so Lexa turned her attention to the blonde.

"Lexa, I know I hated you about a week ago, but I want you to know that I don't anymore. I blamed you for a decision that I made all because you did something you couldn't help doing. I wanted to say I'm sorry…for the way I treated you. I'm sorry for blaming you for something you didn't do, and I'm sorry for saying I hated you, and most of all, I'm so goddamn sorry that I broke your jaw, Lexa. I know it's painful for you, and you should hate me for what I did to you, but you don't, and I'm not sure I deserve that. So, I figure I at least owe it to you to tell you how I really feel about you. I love you, Lexa. I know that your first duty is to your people and that you'll have to go back to them after this is over. I know that you may still have to pick them over me again in the future, but I don't care. I am in love with you, Lexa," Clarke gave Lexa a lopsided smile.

Lexa was taken aback at Clarke's admission. This was exactly what she had always wanted, and in the days after the mountain, everything she thought she would never have. A tear streaked from her eye at Clarke's admission. It was too good to be true, but here Clarke was, saying these words, and Lexa wished more than anything that she could tell Clarke how she felt. She had never wished that she could open her mouth more than she did in that moment. She wanted to tell Clarke that she was everything to her, that she would never betray the blonde again, and she wanted to spend the rest of her life making it up to her. Lexa wished she could at least tell Clarke that she loved her too. Clarke seemed to pick up on Lexa's internal struggle because she instantly said it again, "I love you."

While she said this, she did something weird with her hands, her fingers curling towards each other, forming two claw-like shapes. Lexa tilted her head and pointed questioningly at the strange gesture.

"This is a heart," Clarke explained, "It symbolizes love."

Lexa realized instantly what Clarke was doing, and gratitude washed over her. Clarke was giving Lexa a chance to say she loved her too. Lexa picked up on the doubt in Clarke's eyes and wasted no time in pointing to herself, copying the heart shape with her hands, and pointing to Clarke: _I love you._ Clarke's eyes shined, and she was instantly leaning over to kiss Lexa's cheek, not being able to help herself. Lexa brushed her lips lightly against Clarke's forehead, not putting any pressure on them so as not to hurt herself.

When they went to bed that night, Clarke pulled Lexa over to their bed of furs, and this time, when Clarke laid down on her side, she pulled Lexa's arm around her, intertwining their fingers atop her stomach. As Lexa buried her face in the other girl's blond hair, she wished she was not the commander of her people so that she could stay here in this cave with this girl forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it! Thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is about a week time jump in between this chapter and the last one. Thank you to everyone who leaves kudos and comments on this story. You guys are the best! Enjoy!

Once Clarke had discovered the chalk that her mother had tucked into a corner of the medicine bag, she had instantly pulled out a piece and begun drawing on the cave walls. She didn't notice the chalk before because it was tucked into the front pocket of the bag, but when she had accidentally stumbled across it, she was so overjoyed that she couldn't help immediately trying it out on the wall. She felt a bit guilty that she wasn't spending time with Lexa, but she got really caught up in what she was drawing. Her chalk glided across the wall, creating a mural of the land similar to the one she had drawn what seemed like so long ago in her cell. Only it was ten times better now that she actually lived on the ground and had seen it for herself. Lexa seemed content in just watching her though, sitting quietly on the floor as she worked.

When Clarke finally finished, she stepped aside to show Lexa a full view. Lexa's lips turned up into a smile, and Clarke felt fairly confident she knew the answer to her next question before she even asked it. "Do you like it?"

Lexa nodded, eyes sparkling, clearly enjoying Clarke's talent as much as the blonde did.

"Well, it's getting late. I'll go get you something to eat," Clarke said, moving away from the cave wall and setting down her piece of chalk.

Lexa's hand on her arm stopped her. The brunette shook her head, grabbing the blender jar and slinging Clarke's bow and quiver of arrows over her shoulder before giving Clarke a pointed look and handing her the piece of chalk.

"Lexa," Clarke chided.

_Clarke._ Lexa didn't even need to be able to talk to get her point across. It was obvious in her eyes. Clarke gave in and walked back to the wall as Lexa headed out of the cave. Clarke brought the chalk up to draw a moment from her memory that was very special to her, something she knew that Lexa would love. She got completely lost in her work again, and the only sound in the cave was the chalk scratching against the wall. It seemed like only a minute had gone by before Lexa returned, but Clarke knew it could not be so, as she was putting the finishing touches on her drawing at that moment. While she was working, Clarke noticed Lexa come up beside her with another piece of chalk in her hand, and Clarke was surprised when she saw Lexa begin to draw something as well. Not wanting to break her focus before she was done, Clarke turned back to her own work, finishing it off fairly quickly before turning to Lexa.

"There. I drew this one especially for you," Clarke said, stepping back and allowing Lexa to look at it.

It was a picture of Clarke and Lexa kissing in Lexa's tent, looking as Clarke had imagined they must have looked when they shared their first kiss before they marched upon the mountain. Lexa looked at the drawing with awe-filled eyes, and Clarke could tell that she loved it. The brunette walked over to stand in front of the drawing for a moment and then turned to Clarke with a huge smile on her face.

"I figured you would love that one," Clarke said, and Lexa nodded, "Now, what were you drawing?"

Clarke turned to where Lexa had been drawing, and Lexa looked a little embarrassed to have even been drawing at all. Clarke would admit Lexa was not as talented as her, but she was not a terrible artist either. It was clearly a picture of Clarke and Lexa holding hands and looking at each other lovingly. Clarke had a new braided hairstyle, and there was someone else standing next to them, a smaller person.

"Very cute drawing, but who's this?" Clarke asked, pointing to the other person in the drawing.

Lexa looked thoughtful for a moment before pointing at Clarke, then back at herself. Clarke was confused, wondering what Lexa could possibly be trying to tell her when realization washed over her.

"Is she supposed to be our daughter?" Clarke asked, and Lexa nodded, rubbing the back of her neck and breaking Clarke's gaze, clearly nervous.

Clarke was overcome with love at that moment, reaching out to touch the figure that was their future daughter, the promise of the life they could have together, the life that Lexa clearly wanted. Lexa wanted a child with her.

"What's her name?" Clarke asked, turning back to Lexa.

Lexa smiled, pointing to her mouth and raising her eyebrows.

"Oh, shoot. I totally forgot you can't talk," Clarke said, laughing a bit, "Does she have a name?"

Lexa shook her head, and Clarke decided to let Lexa know that this was something she wanted too. She may have pulled away from Lexa on that day they kissed in her tent, but after spending almost two weeks here alone with Lexa, she knew she was ready to be with her. She knew she never wanted to be away from Lexa again. "We'll just have to figure it out together someday."

Lexa looked up at her in surprise, for some reason shocked at the idea that Clarke would want a future with her as well.

"Yes, Lexa, I would love to have children with you someday," Clarke said.

Lexa smiled as wide as she could with her mouth wired shut, and before Clarke knew it, Lexa was flying into her arms, wrapping her up in a tight hug. Clarke squeezed her back, wishing she could just hold the brunette like this forever. But she knew the other girl must be hungry, so she pulled away.

"Let's get you some dinner," Clarke said, moving over to the blender.

Clarke realized that Lexa had collected some raspberries for herself, and she smiled at the brunette's favorite meal. Once the berries were all ground up, Clarke held up the drink for Lexa and held her hand, even though Lexa hadn't needed help swallowing in over a week. Clarke let her mind wander as Lexa drank, daydreaming about the life she could have with the brunette in the future. Once Lexa was almost done, Clarke noticed her eyes bug out a bit, and a series of coughing noises emitted from the other girl. Clarke's eyes widened in shock. Lexa was choking. Horrified and panic stricken all at once, Clarke immediately jumped up to get the scissors. As she rushed back over to Lexa, she tried to calm down a bit. Panicking would help no one, and she needed to focus or else she could lose Lexa forever.

"Stay as still as you can," Clarke ordered, and Lexa nodded, looking at Clarke with terrified green eyes.

Clarke had never seen the other girl look so scared, and she knew that Lexa's expression was probably mirrored in her own eyes. She forcefully pulled Lexa's lips back with one hand while she cut through the wires on Lexa's right side with the other. She tried to be gentler with the other side of Lexa's face, but the brunette still winced in pain. Clarke quickly clipped through the wires, and Lexa was bending forward, choking more forcefully now that her mouth was free. Clarke instantly began clapping her hard on the back, and Lexa finally coughed up a bit of berry smoothie. She collapsed against Clarke, breathing raggedly, and Clarke's arms were around her in an instant.

"You're okay," Clarke murmured over and over again, running her fingers soothingly through Lexa's hair, "You're okay."

When Lexa finally pulled back, Clarke said, "You scared me. I'm so glad you're alright."

Clarke proceeded to kiss Lexa's cheek over and over again, and Lexa shrugged her off, giggling a little.

"Mochof, Klark," Lexa murmured, wincing as she moved her jaw.

"Don't talk. You're going to hurt yourself. But you're welcome, Lex. What happened?" Clarke asked.

Lexa looked away for a moment, and then she reluctantly grabbed Clarke's hand and brought the blonde's fingers to her throat.

"You needed me to help you swallow," Clarke deduced, "Why didn't you just squeeze my hand?"

Clarke felt she already knew the answer though as Lexa hung her head in shame.

"You haven't needed my help in a week, and you were too proud to admit you needed me again tonight," Clarke said, and Lexa nodded.

"Lexa, I don't care if you hate being weak, but I don't want you to be stupid. If you need help, you need help. I am here to take care of you, so let me. Sometimes, you might just take in too big of a sip, or some days, your jaw may hurt more than others, and you might need help. It doesn't matter how many days you've gone in between without it. I was afraid I was going to lose you today, and I know you were scared too, so don't even try to deny it. Don't you ever do something like that again," Clarke said sternly, and Lexa hung her head again, refusing to look at Clarke.

Clarke softened a bit and hooked her fingers under the commander's chin, bringing green eyes up to meet blue.

"I still love you, Lexa. Even if you do stupid things sometimes, that will never change the way I feel about you," Clarke promised.

Lexa nodded and leaned against her chest. Clarke rested her cheek on top of Lexa's head, allowing her to stay like that for a moment before bringing up what she was dreading having to do. "You know I'm going to have to rewire your mouth shut now, right?"

Lexa pulled back and shook her head, pointing at the rabbit she had brought in for Clarke earlier. Lexa wanted her to eat first. Clarke nodded, and Lexa began to start a fire. Lexa had already skinned the rabbit earlier, so Clarke worked on cutting the meat off into strips. Clarke was relieved Lexa had suggested she eat first. She wasn't ready to rewire Lexa's mouth shut, and she didn't think she ever would be. She really wished she could forever put off what she knew she would have to do next.

Once the fire was ready, Clarke put a strip of meat onto her stick and held it over the fire with one hand while pulling Lexa back into her with the other. Lexa willingly melted into Clarke's side, wrapping her arms around Clarke's waist, and that's how they remained while the blonde ate her dinner.

When Clarke was finished, she moved to grab new wires and the utensils she would need to attach these wires to Lexa's teeth. Clarke paused for a moment, dreading having to do this to Lexa. She didn't know if she could stand knowing Lexa would be in pain the whole time she was putting these on and that instead of Abby, this time, Clarke would be the one hurting her. She took a deep breath, mentally telling herself she had to, or Lexa's jaw would never heal. She made her way over to Lexa, making pretty quick work of removing the cut wires that were still attached to Lexa's teeth. Then, she moved to attach the new ones. It was easy for her to attach the ones on the right side of Lexa's mouth, although it took a while, but when she got to Lexa's bad side, Lexa instantly cried out in pain. Clarke drew back immediately.

"I can't do this. My mom will be here to check on you in a couple days. I'll let her do it," Clarke said.

Lexa gave her a pointed look.

"Lexa, I can't hurt you. I won't hurt you," Clarke said forcefully.

Lexa was not fazed, grabbing Clarke's hands and bringing them back up to her mouth. Clarke tried to pull away, but Lexa's ironclad grip around her wrists held her there, and green eyes tried to get Clarke to see that she would really be helping the brunette, even if the procedure hurt her. Clarke took a shaky breath and relented, continuing where she left off. Lexa tried to keep her whimpers of pain to a minimum, but every now and then, one would escape her lips before she could stop it, and Clarke did her best to ignore it. However, she knew her sorrow and guilt played out on her face. Before long, she was murmuring soothing words to Lexa at each whimper, and Lexa squeezed her knee, letting Clarke know she appreciated it. Clarke breathed out a sigh of relief when she finally finished, and she removed her hands from Lexa's mouth. Lexa dipped her head in gratitude.

"I'm sorry, Lexa," Clarke couldn't help saying.

Lexa just shrugged, knowing that it was her fault after all, as she was the one who refused to admit she needed the blonde's help. Clarke wanted to point out that it was her fault Lexa was even in this mess in the first place, but she didn't, knowing it would only upset the other girl. Clarke opted instead to pull Lexa into her side again, kissing the top of her head.

"I love you so much, you know that?" Clarke murmured against her hair.

Lexa nodded, making the heart shape with her hands to let Clarke know she loved her too.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't going to update this until tomorrow night, but in honor of Clexa winning the Zimbio March Madness poll today, which I am so excited about, I decided to update tonight. Congrats, Clexakru! We deserve the win!

Abby made her way into the cave to check up on Lexa's jaw. It had been two weeks since she had last seen the commander and her daughter, and she would be lying if she said she hadn't worried a little about the blond girl in their time apart. Abby honestly hoped Clarke and Lexa were both doing well. Upon entering, Abby glanced at the cave walls and noticed Clarke had found the chalk she had included with the medical supplies. She scanned her eyes over Clarke's mural of the land before settling them on a drawing of her daughter kissing the commander, and that's when she knew there was definitely something going on between the two of them. Abby wasn't sure what to make of that. The commander had always seemed cruel and emotionless, and she had left them all to die at the mountain. However, Abby knew that Clarke wasn't dumb, so if she had feelings for the commander, there had to be a reason. Abby had seen a more human side of the young brunette when she had last been in this cave, and she wondered if this was the Lexa that Clarke always saw. When she turned her gaze to the ground, Abby realized that Clarke and Lexa were still asleep, curled up together on their bed of furs. Clarke's face was pressed against Lexa's chest, and the commander had her arm curled around the blonde. She hated to wake them up when they looked so content, but she knew she needed to because she couldn't stay here all day. She moved over to where they were laying and shook her daughter's shoulders.

"Just five more minutes, Lex," Clarke groaned in protest, burrowing her face further into Lexa's chest.

Her eyes shot open in realization when she did this, knowing that Lexa could not be shaking her awake when she was lying right beside her. She looked up to see her mother, and she attempted to move away from Lexa, but the commander only tightened her grip on the blonde in her sleep. Clarke shot Abby an apologetic look.

"Wait one second, Mom," Clarke mumbled against Lexa's chest, as her face was now squished against it.

Abby watched on as Clarke shook Lexa's shoulder, trying to awaken the other girl, "Lexa, come on. Let go of me."

Lexa just groaned and held Clarke tighter.

"Lexa, let go! My mom's here," Clarke said, shaking the brunette harder.

Lexa's green eyes blinked opened, noticing Abby, and she released her hold on Clarke, who immediately sat up. Lexa blearily sat up beside her, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

"So, you and Lexa?" Abby asked her daughter.

"There is no me and Lexa," Clarke tried to deny.

Abby gave her a pointed look.

"So it was cold last night. We were sharing body heat," Clarke explained.

"Then, how do you explain that drawing on the wall of you and the commander? Clearly you two are kissing in it," Abby pointed out.

"Fine. There is a me and Lexa, but it's serious, Mom. This isn't just some fling to me. I love her," Clarke said.

Abby was taken aback that whatever had started between them had moved so quickly, that her daughter was professing her love for the person she hated only two weeks ago. Abby noticed Lexa beside her holding up a heart shape with her hands, indicating that she loved Clarke as well. Abby had a lot of questions for her daughter, but she held them back, not wanting to ask in front of Lexa.

"Okay," Abby said warily, and Clarke was clearly shocked by the lack of questions, "So how's our patient doing?"

"Pretty great. Or she was, until two days ago. She started choking, and I had to cut through the wires," Clarke reported.

"Did you put them back on afterwards?" Abby inquired.

"Yes. I didn't want to, but she made me," Clarke admitted.

"Very good, Lexa. Then, it shouldn't have hindered your recovery. The bruising is almost gone, and your face is a lot less swollen than it was the last time I was here. Is it alright if I feel along your jawbone?" Abby asked.

Lexa nodded and turned the injured side of her face to Abby, so she could have better access. Abby lightly ran her fingers over Lexa's jaw, and the brunette winced in pain.

"The jaw feels like it's regaining formation at a pace that I would consider normal. I think it should be healed in about a month," Abby announced, and Lexa nodded.

"Great!" Clarke said, squeezing Lexa's hand.

"Well, I should get going then. It seems you two are doing quite fine here," Abby said, "I'll be back in two weeks."

"No, come on, Mom. You should stay for breakfast. Please," Clarke begged.

"And what is breakfast?"

"I don't know. Rabbit? Lexa gets rabbit a lot."

"Fine. I guess I could stay," Abby relented.

"Great. We'll go get some food. I'll be right back," Clarke said, standing up and grabbing the blender jar.

In an instant, Lexa was stopping her, shaking her head and holding out her hand for the blender jar.

"I can help, Lex. It's no big deal," Clarke said.

Lexa shook her head again, still holding out a hand for the blender jar, and she pointed with her other hand to Abby. Clarke sighed and handed her the jar. "Fine. I'll stay."

Lexa grabbed the bow and arrows and exited the cave as Clarke came over and sat beside Abby. They remained quiet for a few moments before Abby broke the silence. "So. Lex?"

"It's a perfectly acceptable nickname," Clarke said, blushing.

"So you really love her?" Abby asked.

"Yes," Clarke confirmed.

"Are you sure you're feeling love because you want to or because you feel guilty for breaking her jaw?" Abby questioned.

"No. I promise I love her because of who she is, and before you ask, I know she loves me too, and it's not just because I'm taking care of her," Clarke promised.

"And your new drawing? Is that what you two have been doing here?" Abby asked skeptically.

"Kissing? No, Mom. I know that would hurt Lexa right now, so no. But that drawing. That's how I know that Lexa already felt something for me before all this happened. The drawing isn't just a drawing. It's a memory. She kissed me in her tent right before we marched on Mount Weather, and I kissed her back. I pulled back after a while because I didn't want to start anything when we were going to war, but I had these feelings before the mountain too, Mom," Clarke explained.

Abby was surprised, not knowing that the commander and her daughter had been harboring feelings for each other all this time. She still couldn't believe Clarke could trust Lexa after what happened at the mountain though.

"How can you ever trust her again though after what she did? She betrayed you! She betrayed all of us," Abby said.

"She didn't have a choice, Mom. The Mountain Men had her people all rounded up by the door. If she didn't take that deal, they would've all been dead before we even got the door open. She did what she had to do for her people. Sometimes, it doesn't matter what she wants. She always has to do what's best for her people, just like you have to do for yours. If the Mountain Men had offered you that deal, would you really have been able to say no?" Clarke asked.

Abby realized that her daughter was right, and she wondered when she had gotten so smart. Abby would've had to take the deal for her people. Abby had always seen the commander as someone who was emotionless and almost inhuman, but she realized that that was who Lexa had to become in order to lead her people. The girl Abby saw in this cave was much different.

"Well, if you really love her, then who am I to stand in your way?" Abby said.

"Thank you," Clarke said.

"There is one other thing I wish to discuss with you," Abby said, and Clarke inclined her head, indicating for her mother to go on, "Your friends heard about your visit to camp and have been asking about you. I told them where you are and who you're with and why, and they want to come with me to see you on my next visit. Would that be alright with you?"

"Who wants to come?"

"Raven, Octavia, and Bellamy."

"I would really like that. I miss them, and it'd be great if they tagged along next time. I just don't think Lexa will like that very much. She doesn't like for other people to see her weak," Clarke explained.

"I see. So what do you want me to tell them?" Abby asked.

"I want you to tell them to come, but I have to talk to Lexa first," Clarke said, "I'm sure I can convince her to allow it though."

"Good. Would you like me to tell them about your new relationship?"

"Yeah. Why not? They're going to find out anyway."

At that moment, the fur over the entrance was pulled back, and Lexa entered the cave with two rabbits. She sat down near the fire pit, beginning to expertly skin the rabbits, and Clarke moved beside her to cut the meat into strips. Once they were finished, Lexa got a fire going, and Clarke and Lexa each stabbed a stick through a piece of meat, roasting them over the fire like shish kabobs. Once the meat was thoroughly cooked, Lexa held hers out to Abby.

"Thank you, Lexa," she said.

The meat was delicious, the juicy flavor bursting across her tongue, and Abby was glad she had stayed. She was also happy to have spent a little more time with her daughter. After they finished eating, Clarke got out the water canteen and drank from it before offering it to Abby. Abby drank her water while Clarke started the blender, grinding up some blackberries for Lexa. Abby watched curiously as Clarke held the drink up for Lexa, holding her hand with the other. At one point, Lexa squeezed her hand, and Clarke reached up to rub the commander's throat, helping her to swallow. Abby didn't think she'd ever seen her daughter be so gentle with anyone before, and there was no mistaking the love in the blond girl's eyes.

Once Lexa had finished her berries and drunk some water, Abby knew it was time for her to remind Clarke to talk to Lexa about her friends visiting next time, "So, about your friends?"

"Right," Clarke said, as Lexa turned a questioning gaze on her.

"So, my mom told my friends about where I am and why I'm here, and they want to come with her next time to see me," Clarke explained.

Lexa shook her head vigorously.

"Aw, come on, Lexa. Why not?" Clarke whined.

Lexa gave her a look that Abby did not know the meaning of.

"It's not like they're going to tell anyone, and they're not going to make fun of you. They're all really nice. I promise. They'll understand," Clarke said.

Lexa still looked wary, but Abby could tell the brunette was caving. Abby was astonished really at how easily her daughter could get the commander of the grounders to cave.

"Beja, Leksa," Clarke begged.

Lexa looked hesitant, but she nodded, giving in.

"Thanks, Lex," Clarke said, kissing her cheek, before turning to Abby and adding, "You can tell them to come."

"Good. I'm sure they'll all be happy to hear that. I've got to start heading back now though, so I will see you both in another two weeks," Abby said.

"Goodbye, Mom," Clarke said, and Lexa nodded to Abby as she walked out of the cave.

As she emerged into the light afternoon breeze, Abby realized that she was just happy that her daughter had found someone who obviously loved her a lot, even if that person happened to be the commander of the grounders.


	8. Chapter 8

"Will you teach me to be a warrior?" Clarke asked.

Lexa raised an eyebrow.

"I want to learn how to fight," Clarke said.

Lexa cocked her head to the side, wondering what was bringing this on. Clarke had never expressed any interest in this before.

"I want to be able to defend myself, in case I'm ever in danger, and I don't have you to protect me," Clarke explained.

Lexa wanted to tell Clarke that she would always be there to protect her, but she knew that was a promise that she could not keep, and she didn't know if she could find a way to say it either. However, she did think it a good idea for Clarke to learn to fight, so she simply nodded. She walked to the corner of their cave to grab their swords but was stopped by a hand on her arm. She stared questioningly at Clarke when she was handed a stick from their supply of firewood. In answer to her silent question, Clarke playfully hit the brunette with her own stick of firewood.

"This is so we don't get hurt," Clarke explained, "Besides, my mom said no strenuous activity, so you can't go all out. I don't want you to hurt yourself."

Lexa nodded, seeing the reasoning in that. This way, Clarke could go all out without fear of hurting Lexa, and Lexa wouldn't have to try so hard to defend herself. Clarke and Lexa exited the cave and made their way to the clearing outside. Lexa began by teaching Clarke the proper stance and then proceeded to show her some basic moves. After a while, they began sparring, but Clarke was not a very good fighter, and Lexa did not have to try too hard to defend herself. They probably could've used the swords. But Clarke didn't give up. She kept trying and trying, swinging her stick up to meet Lexa's again and again, even after receiving several metaphorical battle wounds from the commander. Finally, after about an hour of sparring, Clarke got past Lexa's defenses and jabbed the commander in the side with her stick. Lexa gasped and covered her pretend wound with her hands, falling to her knees in the grass. Then, she fell onto her back in defeat.

"Yay! I conquered Heda!" Clarke cheered, placing her boot on Lexa's stomach to hold her down.

Lexa couldn't help but smile at how cute Clarke was being as she triumphed over her victory. Lexa wished the blonde could always be this free. She wished she herself could always be this free. Clarke removed her boot from Lexa's stomach and gazed down at her. "Let's go for one more round."

Lexa groaned and closed her eyes, moving the back of her hand to her forehead, pretending she was too weak to get up.

"Come on, you big baby. It's just a little scratch," Clarke played along.

In an instant, Lexa was on her feet and coming for Clarke. The blonde was learning, and she put up a good fight, but as Lexa moved back, and she moved forward, her foot got caught under a tree root, sending her crashing to the ground. Lexa's eyes widened, and she was beside the blonde in an instant, silently trying to ask with her eyes if Clarke was okay.

"I'm fine, Lexa," Clarke said, pushing to her feet, "Let's head back to the cave."

Lexa didn't miss the grimace of pain on the blonde's face when she tried to put her weight on her injured foot. Lexa tried to scoop Clarke up in her arms, but the other girl pushed her away.

"I'm fine, Lexa. I can walk. I just twisted my ankle. It'll be fine by tomorrow," Clarke explained.

It may have been fine by tomorrow, but it wasn't fine today. It was hurting the blonde now, and Lexa stopped her, wanting to take care of Clarke like the other girl had been taking care of her. When Clarke met her eyes, Lexa grabbed her hand and rubbed it along her throat before dropping it and holding her arms out to the girl in front of her, hoping to say: _I let you rub my throat when I need it. Now, let me carry you back to the cave._

"Fine, Lexa. I guess I am being a bit hypocritical," Clarke gave in, "Now, I know what it must be like for you."

Lexa easily picked Clarke up off the ground and carried her back to their cave. When she set her down on the floor, Clarke thanked her, but Lexa wasn't done. She grabbed a cloth, giving Clarke a look that said to stay put, and went to the river, dipping it in the cool river water before bringing it back to Clarke. She knew they really needed ice, but as ice was only available in the winter, cold water would have to do. Lexa brought it over to wrap around Clarke's ankle.

"Thanks, Lex," Clarke said, and Lexa dipped her head.

After a few moments' silence, Clarke turned to look at Lexa, "Will you braid my hair?"

Lexa was taken aback by the question and wondered how she wanted it done. Did she want it to look like Lexa's own hair or…? Only the Heda was supposed to wear his or her hair like Lexa's, but she could make an exception for Clarke. She pointed to her hair to ask the question.

"No. It doesn't have to be like yours. I know that's only for the commander. I want mine to be like a warrior's," Clarke said.

There was no specific hairstyle for a warrior. They each had their own unique one. Lexa tried to convey this to the other girl by shrugging.

"Just do it however you want to, then," Clarke said, "Do it how you drew it in your picture on the cave wall."

Lexa nodded and moved behind Clarke, letting her blonde hair loose so that she could work with it. Lexa wove the hair at the top of Clarke's head into an intricate braid pattern before coming back around to face the blonde, letting the younger girl know that she was finished. Clarke immediately ran her hands over her hair.

"It feels really cool. I wish I could go down to the river, so I could see it," Clarke said wistfully.

Lexa shot her a stern look, letting her know that she would not be going down to the river while her ankle was still hurt.

"Now, I really know what it feels like to be you. I'm really sorry if I ever go a bit over the top, but now I know you understand what it feels like to be me. To worry," Clarke pointed out.

Lexa didn't want to admit it, but Clarke was right. Now, she did understand how Clarke felt about her being injured, so she nodded her head.

"Thank you, Lexa. For the hair. For training me. For taking care of me. For everything. Thank you for just being here with me," Clarke said.

Lexa gave her a pointed look and gestured towards her jaw.

"I know you'd stay with me, even if you weren't hurt. I know you wouldn't leave me. You came looking for me, after all," Clarke said.

Lexa nodded to let her know it was true. She wanted to tell Clarke she would never leave her again, but she couldn't figure out how. Clarke leaned into Lexa, and Lexa wrapped her arms around the blonde, hoping Clarke could feel how much Lexa loved her with every beat of her heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, sorry the chapter was a bit shorter this time. I'm thinking of doing a time jump for the next chapter to be where Clarke's friends come to visit, and after that, the story will soon be drawing to a close. If there's anything you guys would really like to see happen in this story, please feel free to leave me a comment or message me about it on tumblr at clexawarrior, and I'll be glad to try and work it into the plan that I have for the rest of the story. Thank you for reading!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the chapter where Clarke's friends come to visit will be next chapter. I was originally planning for it to be this chapter, but guest commenter Fan suggested an idea to me in the comments on the last chapter, and I decided to write it for this week's chapter. Thank you to Fan for the idea for this chapter, and thank you to everyone for reading! I hope you enjoy the update!

Indra moved through the trees in the direction of what sounded like a voice. She had been searching for Lexa for three days now. She had followed her trail to a clearing in the forest where she had come across dried blood, both black and red. The black could have only come from the commander. As she neared the general area in which the noise had come from, she started to hear the sounds of a scuffle. Peering out through the tree branches, she saw Wanheda attacking the commander. Indra watched as Lexa fell to the ground, and Clarke crouched down beside her, maybe to kill her. She didn't get the chance though as that was the moment Indra burst through the trees. Lexa sprang to her feet, but Indra was focused only on Clarke.

"Get away from Heda!" she shouted.

Clarke's eyes widened, and to Indra's satisfaction, she backed away, leaving Indra to inspect her commander.

"Are you alright?" Indra asked, "Did she hurt you?"

Lexa simply held up a stick with an amused look on her face, and Indra was seriously confused. She wondered if maybe Wanheda had dealt Lexa a hard blow to the head.

"We were sparring," Clarke spoke up, holding up a stick of her own, "She tripped over some rocks, that's all. I wasn't trying to hurt her."

"This is where you've been all this time?" Indra asked Lexa skeptically, "Sparring with Wanheda?"

Lexa answered with a simple nod.

"You were supposed to find Wanheda and bring her back to Polis. You can train her there. You've been gone for over three weeks, Heda. Your people were starting to worry, and so was I. That's why I came looking for you. Are you sure you're alright?" Indra asked.

Lexa only nodded again, and Indra was becoming a little frustrated with Lexa's refusal to explain anything.

"Then, why aren't you coming back now that you've found Wanheda?" Indra asked.

Indra was a bit worried when Lexa didn't answer right away, instead looking to Clarke, as if she was expecting the blonde to answer for her. As if she couldn't answer for herself. Clarke was staring at the ground, so Lexa brought her eyes back up to meet Indra's, looking a bit panicked for a moment before letting a calm expression take over her features. She pulled her lips back to reveal metal devices binding her teeth together. Indra gasped in shock as it all clicked together. The commander was not answering her with words because she could not open her mouth to speak.

"Oh, Heda, who did this to you?" Indra asked.

Lexa looked hesitant to answer, like she didn't want Indra to know. The corners of Indra's lips turned down in a frown, wondering why the commander would want to keep this knowledge from her. Was it the Ice Nation? It couldn't be. Where would they get metal like that? It had to have come from the Skaikru. When the commander finally pointed to Clarke, Indra's eyes sparked with fury. She immediately unsheathed her sword, ready to kill the sky girl for what she had done to Lexa.

"How dare you torture the Heda like this?" Indra snarled.

Before Indra could even swing her sword at Clarke, Lexa was stepping in front of it, shielding the blonde's body with her own, and Indra brought the sword to a halt before she hurt the brunette.

"Heda, you have to let me take care of this," Indra pleaded, "I can get her to remove those awful things from your mouth."

Indra was confused when Lexa shot her a death glare and shook her head. Didn't she want to get out of this mess and come back to her people? Lexa gripped the sword Indra was still holding and pushed it back. She didn't even flinch when the blade cut into her flesh, spattering drops of midnight black blood onto the grass.

"Be careful," Clarke said, grabbing Lexa's hand off the blade as Indra reluctantly sheathed it.

Lexa tried to shrug Clarke off, but the younger girl insisted on tearing off a bit of her shirt to wrap Lexa's bloody hand. Indra watched them curiously, noticing the amount of care the leader of the Skaikru took in bandaging the Heda's small wound. This did not fool Indra though. This was more than likely just an act put on by the blonde girl because she was in Indra's presence. This girl had tormented the Heda, and Indra knew she could not give up on trying to save her commander.

"Take those things off of her!" Indra growled.

"I can't," Clarke said, "They're healing her broken jaw. This is the only way to ensure she makes a full recovery."

Indra was taken aback at the news that her Heda had sustained such a serious injury. She knew that there was no recovering from a broken jaw.

"I have never seen anyone make a full recovery from such an injury," Indra said suspiciously.

"That's because you don't have the technology that the Skaikru has," Clarke explained, "I promise you, her jaw will heal perfectly."

"It better," Indra said, "How was she even injured in the first place?"

Indra noticed as Lexa closed her eyes and took a deep breath, and Indra's eyes hardened as she turned back to Clarke. Judging by Lexa's reaction, whatever Clarke was going to tell her wasn't going to be good.

"I broke her jaw," Clarke admitted, "I was angry that she left my people to die at the mountain, and when I saw her again, I just snapped. I shouldn't have hurt her. I know that, but I did, and now I am doing everything I can to take care of her. I promise she will heal."

"You did this," Indra snarled at the admission, eyes alighting with newfound rage, "Heda, I am sorry, but this girl needs to die now for what she has done."

Indra sighed in frustration when Lexa shook her head adamantly.

"She's right," Clarke said, "I'm the only one who can help her heal. Kill me, and her jaw will never heal properly."

"What about your mother?" Indra asked, "She's a healer as well."

"She cannot spare all that time away from our people to stay here. Besides, if you kill me, my mother will never help you, and then your commander will never speak again," Clarke reasoned.

Indra saw the reasoning in this, but that did not mean she had to like it. "Fine, but the moment the commander is better, you will die for the crimes you have committed against her."

Indra could see the anger smolder up behind Lexa's eyes as she said this. The commander was furious. She looked like she was seconds away from exploding. Lucky for Indra, she could not yell at the moment, otherwise Indra was sure she would have received a good verbal lashing. Lexa settled instead on another death glare and a definitive shake of her head.

"You must take her life, Heda," Indra pushed on, "The punishment for attacking the commander is death. You know this. Our people will never accept anything less."

Lexa's glare did not waver as she brought a finger up to her lips. Indra got her message loud and clear. She was not to speak a word of this to anyone. Indra finally relented with a sigh. "I will say nothing. Why are you doing this?"

"She knows that if you kill me, it will break our already shaky alliance, and it may even start a war. Lexa only wants peace," Clarke said.

Indra's head snapped up at the use of Lexa's given name rather than her title coming from the other girl's lips. Clarke lowered her eyes immediately, and Indra wondered why Lexa was allowing this girl to call her by her name. Indra wanted to say something about it, but it was not her place to question the commander. She had already questioned her more than once today, and she did not wish to further infuriate the young leader.

"I see," Indra said, "I swear I will not say a word of this, Heda. I just hope you are sure of what you are doing."

Lexa nodded and then proceeded to make a shooing motion with her hand. She was dismissing Indra, clearly wanting her to get back to their people. Indra decided not to put up a fight. She knew Lexa was right, and she needed to return. She had left Aden in charge while she was away, but she didn't want to burden the young boy with this task for too long.

"I shall return to our people now. I will tell them that you are having trouble with Wanheda, but you are determined not to leave her until her full loyalty is to you," Indra said, and Lexa nodded her approval.

With a final glance between the two young leaders, Indra bowed to Lexa before heading off into the trees. As she walked, she heard the sound of a laugh behind her, and she paused in her tracks, turning to find Clarke and Lexa laughing as they returned to sparring, their stoic facial expressions replaced with carefree ones. Lexa was wearing the biggest smile Indra thought she had ever seen on the Heda. Indra stayed to watch them, careful to remain out of sight. She nodded her approval of how well Clarke was fighting for someone who had never fought before. Heda was doing well with her. Soon enough, Clarke was holding out her hand, and Lexa was taking it. The two of them disappeared into the trees hand in hand. Indra turned to continue walking, smiling at her new realization that made so much more sense of everything that had happened earlier. Heda and Wanheda had developed feelings for each other.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've got an extra long chapter for you guys tonight. It's the longest chapter I've written, and it came out to be 4,123 words. Enjoy!

The sun beat down mercilessly on Bellamy's back as he waited outside with Octavia and Raven. It was midafternoon, and he could not wait to reach the coolness of the cave. After several minutes, Abby Griffin emerged from the fur-covered entrance and gestured for the others to join her. Bellamy followed Octavia and Raven up the side of the cliff to the cave where Clarke was presumably staying with the commander.

"They're all set. The commander is continuing to make a nice recovery, so you can go in and see Clarke now," Abby said, "Are you sure you'll be alright finding your way back to Arkadia on your own?"

"Yes. I know the way," Octavia assured her.

"Good. Have fun and play nice with the commander. I know she left us at the mountain, but she's not who you think she is. I'm sure you'll like her better once you get to know her, and even if not, please just be nice to her for Clarke's sake," Abby said.

"Will do," Raven said as the Blake siblings nodded.

"Okay. If you're not back by tomorrow evening, I'm sending out a search party. Stay safe," Abby said.

When Abby began to head down the path, on her way back to Arkadia, the three sky people looked to each other before entering the cave where they found Clarke waiting for them with the commander beside her. The first thing that Bellamy noticed was Clarke's hair. It was braided on the top in the unmistakable style of the grounders. The second thing he noticed was the stoic and emotionless face of the commander standing beside her, and he immediately looked away, scared to meet her eyes. Abby had told them all that Clarke was in a relationship with the commander, and upon hearing this, Bellamy had been shocked. He still found it hard to believe, as he had never seen the commander show any emotion whatsoever, much less love.

Bellamy was brought out of his thoughts when Raven threw herself into Clarke's arms, finally breaking the tension as she talked about how much she'd missed the other girl. Once Raven had pulled away, Octavia took her turn at hugging the blonde, and Bellamy followed suit, feeling quite glad to see her again.

"Hello, Commander," Raven said, finally acknowledging the other girl in the room.

"Commander," Octavia said.

Bellamy dipped his head to her. Lexa just lifted her chin as her way of acknowledging them all. Raven backed away slightly, and Bellamy could see that he was not the only one who was afraid of the commander. Even Octavia looked uncomfortable around her, and she was the one who was always talking about how she wanted to be a grounder.

Clarke noticed all of their looks too, and Bellamy could see the confusion in her blue eyes. He did not understand how she could be confused by their reactions, but it made it clear to him that she was quite at ease around the commander. Clarke turned to Lexa, noting the look in her eyes, and elbowed her hard in the ribs. Lexa grunted in pain, and Bellamy was almost positive that he was about to witness Clarke's demise.

"I told you, Lexa. No commander face. You don't need to be the commander with them, and you won't," Clarke scolded.

To Bellamy's surprise, Lexa simply nodded, and Bellamy was astonished as he watched emotion flood into her green eyes. Her face relaxed and so did her body, the tenseness leaving her muscles until she looked almost like a normal girl instead of the almighty commander.

"She says you can call her Lexa" Clarke told them.

Bellamy noticed that as Lexa relaxed, Octavia and Raven relaxed too. Even he felt more comfortable than he had a moment ago.

"So, Lexa, Abby told us Clarke was here with you because she broke your jaw," Bellamy clarified.

Lexa nodded.

"How?" Bellamy had to ask.

He had no idea how their princess could go up against the commander of the grounders and win. Lexa turned to Clarke to answer, and Bellamy realized that he had completely forgotten that Abby said Lexa couldn't speak.

"Sorry," he said, "I forgot."

"So, it's true then?" Raven asked, "You can't talk?"

Lexa shook her head, and Clarke said, "No. I don't know how much my mom told you, but her mouth is wired shut."

"Can I see?" Raven asked curiously.

Bellamy thought for sure Lexa would not allow this, but Clarke turned to her questioningly, and Lexa nodded. Lexa began to bring her hand up to her mouth, but Clarke stopped her, carefully pulling the commander's lip back for her to reveal the wires that were holding her teeth together underneath.

"That's amazing. It must suck not being able to talk though," Raven said.

"Not everyone talks as much as you, Raven," Clarke teased, and Raven rolled her eyes.

"So, how have you been?" Bellamy asked the blond girl.

"Good. Great, actually," Clarke said.

"Because of you and Lexa?" Octavia asked.

Yes. Because of me and Lexa," Clarke said, "And before you ask, I will not be giving any details about my relationship with my girlfriend."

Bellamy noticed Lexa blush at being referred to as Clarke's girlfriend, and he got the impression that he might have seriously misjudged the brunette.

"We brought cards," Raven announced, "I know how much you love cards and have probably missed playing with your besties, so I figured you'd want to play."

"I'd love to play cards," Clarke said, "BS?"

"Of course!" Octavia exclaimed.

Everyone moved to sit in a circle on the floor, and Lexa put her hand on Clarke's arm.

"Wait, guys. Lexa doesn't know how to play cards," Clarke said.

"That's okay. You can explain the rules. I'm sure she'll get the hang of it," Octavia said.

"Okay, so in BS, the deck is divided between all the players, and we go around in a circle, and on each turn, we put down all the cards in our hands of a certain number. We go in order through all the numbers and then start from the beginning again. For example, if I started, I'd have to put down an ace, which is a one, and then, Raven would put down her twos, Octavia would have threes, and so on. The deck goes up to ten, and then it goes jack, queen, king. First person to get rid of all of his or her cards wins. On each turn, you _have_ to play something, even if you don't have the card you need, in which case you have to lie, unless you use your one free pass. If you think someone is lying about the cards they played, you say 'BS' and if you are right, they take the entire pile of cards that has accumulated in the center, but if you are wrong, and they weren't lying, then you have to take the pile," Clarke explained.

Lexa pointed to her jaw questioningly.

"Since you can't talk, you can just point at someone if you think they're lying," Clarke told her, and Lexa nodded.

Clarke turned her gaze back to her friends, indicating she was ready to start the game, and Raven began dealing the cards. Once they were all set, they started to go around the circle, throwing down cards of their respective numbers. After several rounds, Raven threw down a seven, and Lexa pointed to her.

"How did you know?!" Raven asked, flipping over her card to reveal a four.

Lexa just shrugged in response, her lips pulling up in a smile. Raven huffed, taking the entire pile, and they began to continue play. Bellamy caught Clarke lying, and he was caught by Octavia, but no one had called out Lexa yet. She was so good at hiding her feelings that it was impossible to tell if she was lying. She only had three cards left, so when she threw down a five, Bellamy decided to challenge her. "BS."

Lexa smirked at him, turning her card over to reveal that it was in fact a five, and the pile was now his.

"Damn, you're good!" he told Lexa, and she gave him a playful smile.

Lexa won the first game, and as they played on, Bellamy began to like Lexa more and more. He realized that despite her position as leader, she was no different than them. He could tell that Octavia and Raven were starting to really warm up to her as well because they were getting more and more playful with her. Clarke was the first one to catch Lexa in a lie, and Bellamy wasn't surprised because she was the one who knew Lexa the best and could probably pick up on little things that the rest of them didn't notice.

"BS," Clarke said with a smug smile on her face.

Lexa glared at her as she flipped over a three that she had previously claimed was a seven, and she pulled the pile into her hands.

"Looks like there is a downside to letting someone know you too well," Raven joked.

"Clarke caught the great commander in lie. How does it feel to be bested by a princess, Lexa?" Octavia teased.

Lexa rolled her eyes, but she couldn't help the smile that broke out on her face. The game continued, and this time, it was Octavia who won. They played many more games after that. Everyone was completely comfortable around Lexa now, and Octavia and Raven weren't afraid to call BS on her anymore. Bellamy had a great time, and he could tell the others did too, as the game held many smiles and laughs. Bellamy was just really glad to be able to spend time with Clarke again and to play this game with his friends that made everyone so happy. Only when Raven's stomach growled did they stop playing, everyone laughing and realizing how hungry they also were.

"What are we having for dinner?" Raven asked.

"Since we have a lot of people here, we'll need something big. Lex, could you bring down a deer?" Clarke asked.

Lexa nodded, grabbing her bow and arrows.

"She doesn't have to do that," Octavia said, "I can get something."

"Her jaw is broken, O, not her arms. She'll be fine," Bellamy said, and both Clarke and Lexa nodded to him in gratitude.

"Can I go with you?" he asked Lexa, and she nodded.

"Well, what does Lexa eat?" Octavia asked, "Surely, she can't eat deer."

"She eats berries. We mash them up in the blender, and she drinks them with a straw," Clarke explained.

"Okay, then. We'll get the berries," Octavia said.

"What kind of berries are your favorite?" Raven asked Lexa.

"Raspberries," Clarke answered for her.

"We'll get raspberries, then," Raven said.

"Collect them in this," Clarke said, handing Raven the blender jar, "That way, it's easy to carry them. I'll go down to the river to fill up the water canteen, and then I'll get a fire going. Don't take too long. It'll get dark soon."

Bellamy followed Lexa into the slightly cooler evening air. The sun was beginning to set, and he realized that Clarke was right. It would be dark soon. The sound of Octavia and Raven's chatter faded away as he and Lexa made their way further into the trees.

"So our princess did this to you," Bellamy said, "Did you let her?"

Bellamy was surprised when Lexa shook her head.

"Then, how did she do it? You're the commander of the grounders, and we both know Clarke's not the best fighter," Bellamy said, unable to help his curiosity.

Lexa pointed to herself and pantomimed swinging a sword. Then, she jumped back, putting a hand over her mouth in shock, before tilting her head to the side as if she had gotten punched.

"So you sliced her with your sword, and you backed off because you were afraid you had hurt her, and that's when she got you?" Bellamy asked, and Lexa nodded.

"You're really good at explaining things without words, you know. I mean, I guess you've kind of had to learn. What is it like having your mouth wired shut?" Bellamy asked, "I don't mean to be rude. Just curious."

Lexa waved her hand at him to let him know it was okay before giving him a look that told him exactly what it felt like to have her mouth wired shut.

"I'm sorry you have to go through that," Bellamy said, and he found that he genuinely was.

Lexa just shrugged.

"But hey. At least Clarke came around," he said, and Lexa nodded.

"So you really love her then?" Bellamy asked.

Lexa nodded vigorously, something changing in her expression that allowed him to read the answer in her eyes. She loved Clarke more than he ever thought possible. Suddenly, she snapped to attention and brought her finger to her lips. She crept forward, and Bellamy followed until he saw what she had heard. A deer. Carefully nocking an arrow, she took aim and let it fly. It landed right in the deer's eye.

"Nice shot!" Bellamy said.

Lexa nodded in thanks, moving to the deer and slitting its neck with her hunting knife. She was about to pick it up when Bellamy rested a hand on her shoulder.

"Let me carry it," he offered.

Lexa shook her head in protest.

"Come on, Lexa. You did all the hard work. At least let me do this," he said.

She relented, nodding her head and allowing Bellamy to pick up the deer, before following him back to the cave. When they got back, Octavia and Raven were already there, and they looked up excitedly at the sight of the deer. Bellamy placed it on the ground, and Lexa began to skin it while Clarke moved to cut it up. Clarke handed them each a stick to put their meat on, and once it was ready, they all held their meat out over the fire to cook it. Lexa sat beside Clarke as they began to eat.

"Lexa, why aren't you eating?" Octavia asked.

"She needs someone to sit with her in case she chokes," Clarke explained.

"Oh. Okay," Octavia said.

"So, Lexa, what's it like to be the commander? Do you like it?" Raven asked.

Lexa turned to Clarke and went through a series of gestures and looks that Bellamy had no hope of understanding, but Clarke seemed to.

"She says it's great to be in her position of power so that she can ensure that the right thing is always done for her people. However, it's also a great burden. Sometimes, she has to take the lives of those she cares about, and she has to make difficult choices that she herself would never make if she were not the commander," Clarke translated, and Lexa nodded in agreement.

"I never thought of it that way. I just thought it would be great to have all that power. I never thought of the choices I might be forced to make," Raven said.

"Then, you would not be a very good commander," Clarke said, and Raven threw a bit of meat at her.

"Well, anyway, you're really cool, Lexa. I wish we could hang out more often," Raven said.

"I agree. I can see why Clarke likes you so much," Bellamy said.

Lexa dipped her head shyly at them, and Bellamy never thought he would ever see the commander of the twelve clans look shy. After they had all finished eating, Clarke moved to start the blender to grind up Lexa's raspberries. Once they were ready, Clarke pulled off the blender jar, removing the lid and sticking a straw in it. She moved to sit beside Lexa, but before she could give the drink to the brunette, Raven yanked it out of her hands.

"I want to do it," Raven said.

"How come you get to feed her? I should get to help too," Octavia protested.

"You can give her the water," Raven said.

"I should get to give her the berries. I found them," Octavia argued.

"Well, I got here first," Raven said.

Lexa looked back and forth between them, looking extremely overwhelmed.

"Guys, cut it out!" Clarke said, pulling Lexa against her chest, "Stop treating her like a child! You're making her uncomfortable. You don't need to fawn over her like that. If you keep making her feel helpless, you can leave."

"Right. Sorry, Lexa," Raven said before turning to Clarke, "So how do I do this?"

"Hold one hand underneath it," Clarke said, releasing Lexa and guiding Raven's hand under the blender jar, "and hold Lexa's hand with your other hand."

Clarke moved Raven's hand to Lexa's, and Lexa's other hand came up to hold the side of the container.

"Why am I holding her hand?" Raven asked, "I thought that was your job."

"Sometimes, she has trouble swallowing. If she squeezes your hand, just reach up and rub her throat like this," Clarke said, stroking Lexa's throat to demonstrate.

Lexa glared at her, and Bellamy could tell that Clarke was starting to lose her patience with all three of them.

"Listen, if you two start fussing over her again, you're out, and Lexa, if you refuse to accept help when you need it, I will leave you to suffocate," Clarke said sternly.

All three of them nodded and looked as if they wouldn't dare to cause trouble again, but that is the moment in which Octavia decided to do just that.

"Since I'm helping you, can I be a grounder again?" she asked.

"That's it. I'm out," Clarke said, turning to Bellamy, "Make sure you give Lexa her medicine after she eats and before she drinks. Just fill up the vial to the mark. It's in the medicine bag."

Bellamy nodded as he watched Clarke push her way out of the fur-covered entrance to the cave. He hoped she was not going far in case anything happened.

"O, not a good time to ask that," Bellamy said.

"I know. I'm sorry," Octavia said.

Lexa began to drink her raspberry smoothie, but Bellamy could tell she was still uncomfortable because she was drinking way too fast. Before long, she was reluctantly squeezing Raven's hand. Raven reached up to rub her throat until she swallowed.

"Lexa, calm down. They're not going to hurt you," Bellamy told her, "You don't have to go so fast. Just enjoy the raspberries."

She nodded gratefully to him and visibly relaxed, drinking at a much slower pace until it was gone. Octavia then moved to sit beside her with the water, but Bellamy stopped her.

"Clarke said she takes her medicine first," Bellamy said.

He grabbed the bottle from the bag, pouring it into the vial like Clarke had instructed. He moved to sit beside Lexa, holding the vial to her lips and tipping it back so the liquid flowed into her mouth.

"Bell, stop! You can't do it like that! You have to use the straw," Octavia said.

"Shit," Bellamy said.

He had already poured in half the vial, and a bit of the medicine started to dribble down Lexa's chin. Bellamy didn't know how much medicine they had, and he didn't want to waste it, so he quickly put his hand under Lexa's chin and tilted her head back, rubbing her throat to help her swallow and seriously hoping she wouldn't choke. Her eyes widened, making him realize that he had scared her, so he tried to comfort the brunette. "It's okay, Lexa. Don't panic. Just swallow."

He let out a sigh of relief when he finally felt her swallow. He let go of her chin, hoping he didn't hurt her, and was relieved when she gave him a thumbs up.

"I agree with Lexa. Nice save!" Octavia said.

"I'm really sorry about that, Lexa," Bellamy said.

Lexa just waved his apology away and gestured for him to give her the rest of her medicine. He grabbed the straw, putting it into the vial, and obliged. Once Lexa's medicine was gone, Octavia moved beside her to give her some water. After making sure that Lexa was all taken care of, Octavia and Raven began to talk about something or other, but Bellamy wasn't really interested. Lexa was sitting beside him fighting to keep her eyes open, and he knew what was going to happen next before he felt it. Lexa slumped against his arm, and her breathing evened out, so he knew she had fallen asleep. He sat and listened to Octavia and Raven for a few more minutes before turning to the still sleeping Lexa.

"Let's get you to Clarke," he said.

Bellamy carefully scooped Lexa up in his arms and carried her out of the cave. He found Clarke just sitting outside, legs dangling over the path. The moon was shining brightly overhead, illuminating Clarke's figure in the darkness. Bellamy watched as Clarke turned to face him.

"I brought someone to see you," Bellamy said, nodding his head to the sleeping girl in his arms.

"Lexa fell asleep?" Clarke asked, smiling.

"Yeah. She's out cold. Does her medicine make her drowsy or something?" Bellamy asked.

"Maybe a little, but I think this is more due to the two you left inside," Clarke said.

Clarke then reached out her arms for Lexa, and Bellamy set the commander down beside the blonde. Lexa immediately curled into Clarke's chest, wrapping her arms around the blonde's waist, like she could sense who it was, even though she was sleeping.

"Wow. She must really like you. She would barely lean against my arm, and she's all cuddled into you," Bellamy said, sitting beside Clarke.

"Yeah. She gets really snuggly when she's tired," Clarke smiled down at the brunette, running her hand up and down Lexa's arm.

"That's cute," Bellamy admitted.

It was true. Bellamy found it adorable to see the ruthless commander of the grounders curled into the woman she loved while she slept. It was nice to know that this girl that carried the weight of the world on her shoulders could let her walls down once in a while.

"Do you love her?" Bellamy asked curiously.

"Yes. So much," Clarke said, "More than anything."

"What will you do when this is over?" he asked.

"I think I'm going to go back to Polis with her," Clarke said.

"I figured you'd say that."

"You'll still see me. You can visit whenever you want. You can even come live there permanently if you'd like to. Octavia would love that."

"I don't know if Lexa would allow that. You're not the commander, remember?"

"She would if I asked. She listens to me. Besides, I do plan to be her second in command one day."

"You're that serious about this?"

"Yes. I want to spend the rest of my life with her, Bell, and she knows it. The best part is that she wants to spend the rest of her life with me too. I never want to leave her again," Clarke admitted.

"Then, I'm happy for you," Bellamy said.

They sat outside in silence for several more minutes, simply enjoying the cool night air: Bellamy, Clarke, and the sleeping brunette in between them.

"Well, we better get back inside before Octavia and Raven try to claim your bed for themselves," Bellamy said after a while.

"They better not. There are plenty of spare furs in the back for them to use," Clarke said.

Bellamy got to his feet, glancing back down at Clarke, who hadn't moved.

"Can you get this big oaf off of me?" Clarke asked, "She's too heavy for me."

"Big oaf? She's so small," Bellamy said.

"Better not let her hear you say that," Clarke said, and Bellamy laughed.

Clarke pulled Lexa's arms from around her waist so that Bellamy could easily pick her up again and carry her back inside. Octavia and Raven had thankfully found the spare furs and were just lying down for the night. Clarke got into her own bed of furs, and Bellamy laid Lexa down beside her. The minute Lexa was in the bed, she immediately rolled halfway onto Clarke, causing Octavia and Raven to let out a chorus of awws as the blonde grunted underneath her.

"Do you want me to move her?" Bellamy asked, eyes dancing with amusement.

"Nah. She's fine," Clarke said, reaching her hand up to rub soft circles on the brunette's back, "Besides, she'll just roll right back onto me again."

"Alright," Bellamy said, smiling, "Goodnight, Princess."

"Night, Bell," Clarke said, and Bellamy made his way to the back of the cave to grab some extra furs for himself.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who comments and leaves kudos on this fic! I hope you enjoy the new chapter!

Lexa pulled blueberry after blueberry off the bush in front of her, filling up the blender jar with what was soon to become her dinner. Once it was full, she was about to get up and leave when she saw a very plump blueberry towards the back of the bush. Lexa could almost taste the delicious juiciness of the berry that would burst over her tongue if she were able to bite into it. She regretted that she could not bite into it right now, but she knew that Clarke could, so she resolved to get the berry for the blonde. Sticking her head into the leaves, Lexa reached out her hand, pushing herself farther in until her fingers closed around the berry. She plucked the berry off the branch and pulled back to head to the cave, but she yelped in pain when the branches tugged at her hair, forcing her to stop moving. She growled in frustration when she realized that her hair had gotten tangled in the branches. It was caught in three different places, mainly on the branch to her left, which a huge clump of her hair was knotted around. Reaching her arm back out, she dropped the blueberry on top of the pile that was accumulating in the blender jar. Then, she set to work on untangling her hair from the branches above. However, the more she struggled to get free, the more knotted her hair became. Lexa felt panic bubble up in her chest at the realization that she was stuck. Knowing that Clarke was out there somewhere hunting for herself, Lexa screamed as loud as she could, but she was held back by the fact that her mouth was wired shut, and she could not scream half as loud as she would've otherwise been able to. Still, she hoped that the blonde might be able to hear her.

After a few minutes of screaming to try and catch Clarke's attention, Lexa resigned herself to the fact that the younger girl was not close enough to hear her, and she would have to wait until the blonde came looking for her. After a few more minutes of fruitlessly struggling to untangle her hair from the branches, Lexa gave up and settled into the half-laying half-sitting position she was forced to remain in so that the branches would not pull too hard on her hair.

After what had to have been an hour, Lexa's back ached from sitting in the same horrible position for so long, and she had to blink back the tears of frustration that began to fill her eyes at the prospect of being stuck out here all night. Lexa was extremely relieved when she finally heard the sound of Clarke's voice somewhere nearby in the forest, calling out her name. Lexa began to scream again as best she could, and before long, Clarke was racing towards her.

"Oh, Lexa, I was so worried. You weren't coming back, and I instantly feared the worst. What happened?" Clarke asked.

Lexa didn't know how to answer, but luckily, she didn't need to because when Clarke reached her side, she noticed right away what the problem was. To Lexa's horror, she burst out laughing.

"You got yourself stuck in a blueberry bush?" Clarke laughed, clutching at her sides, "You look ridiculous."

Lexa glared at the blonde, not finding the situation funny in the slightest. If Clarke would stop laughing and help her, that would be great. She did realize she must look rather comical at the moment though, and she might have found it funny too had she not been stuck out here for an hour now. She scoffed in irritation, tired of being held in the same uncomfortable position by the branches that had taken hostage of her hair.

"I'm sorry," Clarke said, trying her best to stop laughing, "I'm sorry. I couldn't help it. The commander of the twelve clans gets defeated by a blueberry bush. What would your warriors say?"

Lexa wanted to tell Clarke that they would never know and that she would never be in this predicament in front of them because there were people to pick berries for her in Polis. However, with her mouth held shut by the wires, she had no way of defending herself, and she could only hope to get Clarke to see reason and help her. Lexa put her hand on Clarke's arm and looked at her with pleading green eyes.

"Okay. Okay," Clarke relented, "Let's see if I can get you out of here."

Lexa's eyes widened at the thought that Clarke might not be able to get her out. What would happen if Clarke couldn't untangle her hair from the branches either? Lexa shuddered as she thought of the answer to that question. They'd have to cut off her hair. Lexa hoped with all her might that it wouldn't come down to that, and Clarke must have noticed the worry in her eyes because she knew exactly what Lexa was thinking.

"We shouldn't have to cut off your hair. I think I'll be able to untangle it. Just stay still," Clarke instructed.

Lexa sat as still as she could as Clarke unwound her hair from around the branches it was caught in, sighing in great relief when Clarke got the biggest tangle out. Clarke got the second tangle out fairly quickly, but when she reached the third, no matter how hard she worked at it, it only knotted tighter around the branch. After several minutes of trying to no avail, Clarke finally let go.

"I can't get this one out, Lexa. I'm going to have to cut it," Clarke said, "I'm really sorry."

Lexa shook her head as well as she could with a lock of her hair still stuck in the bush.

"It's the only way to get you out, Lexa," Clarke argued, "It's not much. Just a small lock of hair, and I'll only have to cut off the bottom—third?—of it. It won't be really noticeable. I promise."

Lexa eyed Clarke warily, but she knew Clarke was right. It was the only way for her to get away from this horrible bush. She also saw that it was indeed small, compared to the other tangles. Lexa knew she was lucky the other tangles had come out, or she would've had to cut most of the hair from her head. It was necessary for her to wear her hair in the style of the commander, and if she had to cut it, she would no longer be able to do so. She was lucky Clarke would only have to cut off a small lock. Lexa nodded to let Clarke know she could cut the hair.

"Lucky for you, I brought your hunting knife in case someone was attacking you or something," Clarke said, holding up the knife.

Clarke got to work in cutting off the bottom part of the lock of hair that she couldn't free from its leafy captor, cutting off as little as possible. Once Clarke finished, Lexa looked at the lock of her hair that was now shorter than all the others and sighed in relief when she realized that Clarke was right, and it wasn't really noticeable, easily getting lost amongst the braids. Clarke put away the hunting knife and grabbed the blender jar before standing up and offering a hand to help Lexa up. Lexa gratefully took it, finally moving from the cramped position she had been in for too long.

"If you don't mind my asking, why was your head in the bush in the first place?" Clarke asked amusedly.

Lexa's eyes lit up as she realized she had forgotten about the blueberry that had cost her a lock of her hair. She reached around Clarke to pluck it from the top of the pile in the blender jar before holding it up so the blond girl could see it.

"You wanted the plumpest blueberry on the bush?" Clarke asked, shaking her head, "I should've known."

Lexa did not hesitate to hold it out to Clarke.

"You got it for me?" Clarke asked, and Lexa nodded, "Now I feel bad for laughing at you."

Lexa just shrugged, knowing she probably would have done the same if the roles were reversed. Clarke released Lexa's hand to grab the berry and pop it into her mouth. Lexa watched a smile spread across the blonde's face as she enjoyed the juicy flavor.

"Delicious," Clarke said, taking Lexa's hand again, "Thanks, Lexa."

Lexa just squeezed her hand in answer.

* * *

 

When they got back to the cave, Lexa had a major kink in her back from sitting on the ground in such an awkward position for so long. More like many kinks in her back, and she wanted nothing more than to lay out on her bed of furs for a while before eating.

"Lexa, are you okay?" Clarke asked, "You're walking funny."

Lexa turned to look at Clarke, moving her hand to her lower back and groaning, hoping Clarke would get the message.

"Your back hurts from crouching on the ground for so long?" Clarke asked, and Lexa nodded.

"In that case, let me give you a massage," Clarke said, "It's the least I can do for you after getting me that wonderful berry. Lie down on the furs."

Lexa complied, lying out on her stomach on their shared bed of furs. She was a bit surprised when Clarke sat on top of her, straddling her waist. She must have tensed up at the contact because Clarke asked, "Is this alright, or do you want me to sit beside you?"

Lexa gave her a thumbs up signal to indicate that she was fine how she was, and she sighed in content when Clarke's hands began to massage her back. Lexa reveled in the feeling of Clarke's fingers against her as she kneaded the knots out of the brunette's back. At least one good thing had come from Lexa's encounter with the bush.


	12. Chapter 12

Clarke looked up when she heard someone enter the cave. She was not surprised to find it was her mother, coming for Lexa's six week check-up. Clarke squeezed the hand that Lexa grabbed onto when Abby entered. She knew that Lexa was hoping to get the wires off of her teeth today.

"Hello, you two," Abby said in greeting, "How have you been doing, Lexa?"

Lexa held up a thumbs up gesture, which Abby knew Clarke must have taught her, and Abby smiled at her.

"She's been doing really well, Mom. She hasn't had any problems, and I think her jaw might be back to normal," Clarke said.

"Well, in that case, let me have a look," Abby said.

Clarke's mother proceeded to run her fingers along Lexa's jaw. She was able to put more pressure on the jawbone, and the brunette didn't flinch once. Clarke knew this was a very good sign.

"You're right. Her jaw is completely back to normal. I can remove the wires today," Abby said.

Abby reached into the medicine bag to grab the scissors and begin the procedure on Lexa, but Clarke stopped her before she could even get the scissors out of the bag.

"Mom, wait. I want to do it," Clarke said.

"Clarke, it'll be faster if I do it. I don't have a lot of time today because I have people to tend to back at Arkadia. There's some kind of virus going around, and eight people have come down with it already," Abby explained.

"Then you should get back to them," Clarke told her, "You don't have to watch over me. I promise I know how to do it."

"Clarke, Lexa's jaw is healed now, and she will be returning to her people. Don't you want to come back with me to yours?" Abby asked.

"No," Clarke admitted, "I want to go to Polis with Lexa."

Clarke watched as two shocked pairs of eyes settled on her: one brown and one green. She had never discussed this with either of them, not even Lexa, so the brunette was as shocked as her mom. Clarke wondered what Lexa expected would happen once this was all over, but it was clear now to the blonde that the commander had assumed that Clarke would return to her people. Clarke thought about it, but she knew she did not belong in Arkadia anymore. She would miss her friends, but she knew that she was never cut out for that lifestyle. She wanted to learn to be a warrior, and she finally understood where Octavia was coming from when she chose to be Indra's second. More than anything though, Clarke just wanted to remain with Lexa. She had spent three months without the woman she loved after the mountain, and the only thing she learned from the experience was that she never wanted to be without her again. She knew that Lexa belonged to her people. The brunette didn't have a choice, but Clarke did. Clarke could choose to lead by Lexa's side and take some of the responsibility off the shoulders of the girl who was overwhelmed with a burden that someone her age should never have to bear.

"I understand you love her, and you can visit her whenever you want, but you don't have to live with her full time," Abby said, when she finally remembered how to speak.

"I know that, Mom. I want to live there. I want to go see the capital. I don't want to go back to Arkadia. I'll miss you and my friends of course, but you guys can come visit me anytime you like. I just don't feel like I belong in Arkadia anymore. I belong with Lexa now," Clarke admitted.

"Clarke," Abby warned.

"Mom, please don't fight me on this one. I've already made up my mind," Clarke told her.

"If you're sure," Abby said, "This will definitely take some getting used to."

"I know, and I'm sorry," Clarke said.

"You don't have to be sorry. You love Lexa. I get what that's like. I was in love once too, you know," Abby said, "And to be honest, I don't think I could've picked a better girl for you if I tried."

"Really?" Clarke asked.

"Yes. Lexa, I never would've thought it at first, but you're a very sweet girl. Make sure you take care of Clarke in the capital," Abby said, "I don't want her to get hurt."

Lexa nodded earnestly, clearly wanting Abby to know that she would do anything to ensure Clarke's safety.

"Lexa will keep me safe, Mom," Clarke said.

"Good. If you're sure you will be fine getting her wires off, Clarke, I will leave you two be for now. I have to get back to our people," Abby said.

Clarke nodded in response, and Abby hugged her goodbye. "I'll miss you so much."

"I'll miss you too, Mom," Clarke said, "Come visit soon."

Abby nodded before pulling away and hugging Lexa, to the brunette's shock. Lexa returned the hug, and Abby said one final goodbye to them both before exiting the cave. All Clarke could do was stare after her and hope that she had made the right decision. She finally tore her gaze away to see concerned eyes fixed on her.

"Yes, Lexa. I'll be fine. I promise," Clarke said, "I just hope you're okay with my decision. I'm sorry I never mentioned it to you, but I was never really sure of it myself."

Lexa nodded. Green eyes proceeded to give Clarke a pointed look, and Lexa gestured to herself.

"No, I'm not just doing this for you, Lexa. I mean, I definitely want to be close to you, but I'm doing it for me too. I don't fit in with the Skaikru anymore. The more time I spend with you, the more I want to be like your people and the more intrigued I am by your ways. Sure, I was born to be a leader, but I was never really the leader of my people. My mom was. But I'd love to help you be the leader of yours," Clarke said.

Lexa nodded gratefully, and Clarke moved to get the scissors. "Let's get these wires off then."

As Clarke prepared to put the scissors in Lexa's mouth, she realized that she was going to miss taking care of Lexa. I mean, she was happy that Lexa's jaw was healed, and she would be free to talk and eat again, but she was also sad that the commander wouldn't look to her for help anymore. Lexa was a warrior, the leader of her people, and was therefore perfectly capable of doing everything for herself. Clarke was the one who always needed her help. Clarke knew it was selfish, but it was nice for the brunette to need her for a change. It made her feel important and like she could actually give back to the other girl for helping her so much. She would miss being here in their own little cave with Lexa, taking care of the almighty commander who loved Clarke enough to allow the blonde to see her weak. Lexa's hand came up to cup Clarke's cheek, and blue eyes met worried green. Clarke realized that she must have just been sitting there with a dazed expression on her face as she thought.

"I'm sorry. I'm just…gonna miss taking care of you, that's all. I never realized how much I enjoyed it until now. It feels like you're always helping me, and it's nice for me to able to give back for a change," Clarke explained.

Lexa reached up and grabbed Clarke's wrist that still held the scissors, lowering it back to her side.

"What are you doing?" Clarke asked.

Lexa held up one finger, and Clarke understood. "One more night? You'd keep your mouth wired shut for one more night just so I can take care of you, even though you hate it?"

Lexa nodded, and Clarke's heart melted at the gesture. "That's very sweet of you, Lex, but I can't ask you to do that. You've had those things on for long enough."

Clarke raised the scissors again, but Lexa would not have it. She pushed Clarke's hand right back down against her side, shaking her head firmly.

"Are you sure?" Clarke asked.

Lexa nodded, making her hands into the shape of a heart.

"I love you too, Lex," Clarke said.

Clarke reveled in her last night of taking care of Lexa. She was pretty sure that Lexa acted extra helpless just so that Clarke would feel needed, and Clarke knew she was falling harder in love with the brunette with each passing second. While gathering berries, Lexa was surprisingly careless, slicing the palm of her hand open on a jagged branch so that Clarke had to stitch it up when they got back to the cave. Clarke suspected that Lexa squeezed her hand far many more times than she actually needed to during dinner, and when they went down to the river for an evening bath, Lexa let Clarke wash most of her body for her, feigning exhaustion from carrying a deer up to the cave for Clarke to eat, even though she'd done it countless times before with no problem at all. As Clarke curled up with Lexa that night to go to sleep, Clarke was extremely grateful to have someone like Lexa in her life. All Clarke had to do was say she would miss taking care of Lexa, and Lexa acted weaker than Clarke had ever seen her so that the blonde could do just that. She didn't think she had ever been loved this way, nor had she ever felt love this strong for someone else.

* * *

 

The next morning, once they were both fully awake, Clarke got ready to cut through Lexa's wires for real this time. She brought her scissors into Lexa's mouth and carefully snipped through the wires. She felt Lexa's eyes on her as she worked to remove the metallic devices from the brunette's teeth. Once she pulled the last of the wires from Lexa's mouth, she sat back and raised her eyes up to meet the other girl's.

"That's it. I'm all done," Clarke said.

Lexa tentatively flexed her jaw, opening and closing her mouth. A smile turned up the corners of her lips as she realized that she could now do so without pain.

"Well, you can talk now. Say something," Clarke prompted, wanting to hear the brunette's beautiful voice again.

"Ai hod yu in, Klark," Lexa rasped.

"Ai hod yu in seintaim, Leksa," Clarke responded.

"You know what else we can do now that my mouth is free?" Lexa asked.

"What?" Clarke asked, liking where this was going.

Lexa didn't respond. She simply leaned over and pressed her lips to the blonde's. Clarke reveled in the feeling of Lexa's lips against hers again after far too long, and a huge smile broke out on her face. After a few seconds, Lexa pulled away, leaving Clarke to whine in disapproval.

"We need to eat, Clarke," Lexa said, "Because another thing that I can do now is eat meat."

"That's right. You can go off your berry diet," Clarke said.

Lexa nodded and moved to start a fire while Clarke began to cut more meat off the deer Lexa had brought down for Clarke the previous night. They each took a piece to roast over the fire, and Clarke waited for Lexa to bite into hers, wanting to see the look on her face when she tasted meat again. Lexa bit into the juicy slab of meat and closed her eyes in pleasure.

"Good, huh?" Clarke asked.

"So good," Lexa moaned.

Clarke ate quietly, allowing Lexa to have a moment to enjoy her meat with no interruptions. She knew it must have been hard for the other girl to solely eat berries all this time, especially with Clarke eating meat right in front of her. Clarke was just glad that Lexa was finally getting to eat real food again. Once they finished eating, Lexa turned to Clarke, and the blonde gave her full attention to the other girl, sensing the seriousness in her posture.

"Clarke, I wish to speak with you about something," Lexa said.

"Go ahead. What is it?" Clarke asked.

"I know you wish to return to Polis with me, but I do not wish for you to completely leave your people. I want your people to become my people. I am offering the Skaikru the chance to join my coalition and become the thirteenth clan," Lexa said.

"Yes! I mean, I'd have to talk to my mom about it, but I'm sure she would agree. I would love that. Thank you, Lexa," Clarke said, "and thank you as well for being so sweet to me. Thank you for not hating me after I broke your jaw, and thanks for last night. I know you were acting weak on purpose for me."

Lexa blushed a deep shade of red. "You noticed that?"

"Yes. And I appreciated it. You didn't have to do that for me," Clarke told her.

"I would do anything for you," Lexa said softly.

Before she knew it, Clarke was crashing her lips against Lexa's. As they kissed hungrily, Clarke's tongue brushed lightly against Lexa's bottom lip, and Lexa quickly opened her mouth, accepting it. As their tongues danced together in a battle for dominance, Clarke pulled Lexa's shirt up and over her head before quickly discarding her own. Clarke backed Lexa up to lay on the furs, climbing on top of her without breaking the kiss. She moved her lips to kiss along Lexa's newly healed jawbone, and as her lips traveled lower, Clarke's hand searched for the clasp to undo Lexa's bra.

"Is this okay?" Clarke asked, pulling back to look Lexa in the eye when she found the clasp.

Lexa nodded at her to keep going, and Clarke pulled Lexa's bra from her body, exposing her girlfriend's perfectly round breasts. Clarke immediately captured a nipple in her mouth, sucking it as her hand moved up to knead the other, causing Lexa to emit a tiny moan, a sound Clarke would most definitely like to hear again.

As she moved her mouth to the other nipple, Clarke's hands found their way down to Lexa's pants, unbuttoning them and pushing them down as far as she could, along with the brunette's underwear. Lexa kicked them off the rest of the way, immediately spreading her legs for Clarke.

"Clarke, I need you," Lexa growled.

Clarke pulled away for a moment to admire the sight before her. The commander of the twelve clans was panting beneath her, begging for Clarke to touch her, her eyes dark with arousal.

"Wow, Commander, when we first met, I never thought I'd see you like this," Clarke joked as she drunk in the sight of the beautiful girl underneath her.

"Clarke please," Lexa said, trying to regain a bit of her calm composure, "I have not been touched in a very long time."

Clarke's heart swelled at Lexa's admission, overjoyed at the fact that Lexa wanted her when she could have anyone.

"You're so beautiful," Clarke said.

She wasted no time in pushing two fingers inside of Lexa, causing the commander to cry out in pleasure as she tangled her fingers in Clarke's blond curls. Clarke built up a faster pace, Lexa's moans becoming harder and harder for her to hold back, and Clarke didn't think she'd ever heard a sound more beautiful. Clarke added a third finger, allowing her tongue to swirl around the other girl's clit, and she knew the brunette was close. Pulling Lexa's clit into her mouth, Clarke sucked hard, and the commander of all twelve grounder clans screamed her name, which echoed off the cave walls, as the brunette orgasmed beneath her.

"How was that?" Clarke asked nervously as Lexa came down from her high.

"Amazing," Lexa breathed out before flipping Clarke onto her back with a growl, "My turn."

Clarke squealed in pleasure as the brunette settled on top of her. Lexa had her out of her clothes in record time, and Clarke didn't even try to bite back her moans as the brunette worshipped every inch of her body. When the blonde came harder than she ever had before, she knew she'd made the right decision in expressing her desire to accompany Lexa back to Polis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So a bit of smut this chapter. This is my first ever attempt at writing smut, so hopefully I didn't do too bad. Anyways, this is the last chapter of this story. I will be writing an epilogue though, which will be out sometime later next week. Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read this, especially those of you who have been here from the very beginning! I love you all!


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I received multiple reviews on fanfiction.net on the last chapter asking me to continue this fic, so I have decided to extend it. As of right now, I am planning to write three or four more chapters. Enjoy!

Clarke let go of Lexa's hand when they finally reached the outskirts of Polis. They had agreed that it was best to say nothing of their relationship to Lexa's people until after the ceremony for the Skaikru's induction into the coalition. As they walked through the gates, they were met with a chorus of people shouting for their Heda. The crowd parted around them, everyone bowing to the commander as she and Clarke walked by. Clarke looked around in wonder. There was genuine joy in the eyes of the people at the sight of Lexa, and Clarke smiled at how much they obviously loved their commander. She and Lexa made their way through the stalls of the marketplace, stopping to taste a bit of meat at a butcher stand. It was better than anything she had tasted on the ground this far, and Clarke hummed in approval. When Clarke realized where Lexa was leading her, she gasped in awe. They were heading towards a huge tower that rose high into the sky. It looked like something straight out of one of the old books she had read on the Ark.

"You live in there?!" Clarke asked.

"Yes, Clarke, and now this is where you shall live as well," Lexa smiled.

"That's amazing," Clarke said.

Her lighthearted tone wavered though when she noticed Indra waiting for them at the base of the tower. The warrior's face was set in a scowl, and Clarke could tell right away that something was wrong. Lexa's smile faltered as well as she realized what had made Clarke's drop.

"Indra, is something wrong?" Lexa asked, stopping in front of her.

"Sha, Heda. Skaikru attacked one of our villages. A Trikru village not far from Arkadia," Indra reported.

"What? My mother would never authorize that," Clarke protested, "It must be a mistake."

"Your mother did not know about it. She was away at the time, and a band of rebels slipped out of the camp to attack our people. They were led by a man named Charles Pike," she said.

Clarke exchanged a guilty glance with Lexa as they both realized the reason why Clarke's mother had been away from her people. In a way, this was all their fault.

"How did you come by this information?" Lexa asked.

"Octavia of the Sky People arrived here two days ago to assure us that it was only rebels and that they had it all under control. I have offered her a guest room because she wishes to speak with Wanheda. Her brother led her to believe that Wanheda would be returning with you, and I can see that this information was correct," Indra said.

"What does she want to see me about?" Clarke asked.

"She would not say. Only that it is important," Indra said.

"Let her know I will be up to see her shortly," Clarke said.

The blonde waited while Lexa exchanged a few more words with her general. Once Lexa was ready to go, she gestured for Clarke to follow her inside. Her posture was rigid, the calmness that Clarke had come to know in the past weeks gone.

"Lexa, are you okay?" Clarke asked.

"I am fine, Clarke. I am only worried that the clans will not accept the Skaikru into the coalition as easily as I had hoped," Lexa admitted.

Clarke was glad that Lexa didn't try to lie to her and pretend she was fine. She smiled slightly at the fact that Lexa trusted her enough to tell her exactly what she was thinking.

"It was never going to be easy," Clarke told her, "We both know the Ice Nation probably will not accept it."

"I can deal with Azgeda," Lexa said, "What I can't deal with is all twelve clans rejecting my decision. If the Trikru rejects the Skaikru's initiation into the coalition, it will reflect badly on me, as that is my birth clan, and the other clans will most likely follow."

"Lexa, don't worry about that. Indra is the leader of the Trikru, is she not? She will never betray you," Clarke said.

Lexa just nodded, still looking wary. After making sure no one was watching, Clarke reached over and gave Lexa's hand a reassuring squeeze. Lexa turned to her and smiled, squeezing back before letting her hand drop.

"I will take you to the room where Octavia is staying," Lexa said, "She should be expecting you."

* * *

When Clarke walked into Octavia's room, the brunette instantly jumped up from where she had been sitting on the bed. Clarke pulled the door shut behind her, and Octavia rushed over to meet her.

"Clarke, thank god you're here," Octavia said.

"Octavia, is everything alright? You said everything was under control, but the way you are acting right now suggests otherwise," Clarke said.

"I lied to Indra. I didn't want to stir up suspicion in Polis because I didn't want them to declare war, but it's worse than what I said. While Abby was with you two, Pike and some other survivors from Farm Station slipped out of camp and attacked a Trikru village. That much was true. None of the Trikru were hurt because Bellamy and I managed to get there before Pike and warn them, but everything isn't under control. Abby and Kane have decided to hold an election to allow the people to vote for who they want as chancellor, and some of the rebels have decided that Pike should have a place on the ballot," Octavia explained.

"And if he gets elected, there's no way the Skaikru will become the thirteenth clan," Clarke said.

"The thirteenth clan? Lexa's letting us into the coalition?" Octavia asked.

"Yes, but she won't be able to if Pike ruins it. Why did he even attack a village in the first place?"

"When his station landed, they were attacked by the Ice Nation, and many of them were killed. Now, he thinks that all grounders are savages and that we should kill them."

"Then, he's an idiot. Where is he now?"

"He's locked up in the stockade. They're holding him and his followers there for now until they decide on a punishment."

"This is crazy," Clarke said, "If he's locked up, he shouldn't be allowed to be elected."

"That's what I said, but nobody's listening," Octavia said.

"Then we'll ride back to Arkadia together. At dawn," Clarke said, "I will make sure that they understand that we will be joining the commander's coalition, and that I will be the ambassador for the Skaikru. I will also be sure to set some ground rules while I am there, and the new chancellor will punish anyone who breaks these rules as he or she sees fit."

"But what if Pike is elected chancellor?" Octavia asked, "He won't follow your rules, and he sure as hell won't allow us to be the thirteenth clan. He hates the grounders."

"You leave that to me," Clarke said, "Pike won't get elected. I'll make sure of it."

"Are you sure you want to do this, Clarke? You shouldn't have to leave Lexa for us," Octavia said.

"You wouldn't have come here if you didn't need my help. Besides, if Pike gets elected, we will go to war, and I don't want to see you or my mom or any of our friends get hurt. And don't feel guilty if you think I'm only doing this for you. I'm not. With the Skaikru's guns, there will be many casualties on the side of the grounders too. I don't want Lexa getting hurt either," Clarke explained.

"Okay. We leave at dawn," Octavia agreed.

"You should get some rest," Clarke said, "We have a long day ahead of us."

Octavia simply nodded, and Clarke turned from the room to head to the commander's room, which she would be sharing with Lexa. When she walked out into the hallway, Clarke realized that she didn't actually know where Lexa's room was. Lucky for her, a guard was waiting down the hall to bring her to the room where she would be staying. When she entered, she could just see the outline of Lexa in bed in the dim light of the candles. Clarke gazed in awe upon Lexa's huge bed and the beautiful design of the tall headboard. Thinking Lexa to already be asleep, Clarke climbed into bed beside her, wrapping her arms around the brunette and snuggling into her from behind. However, the minute Clarke settled into Lexa, the commander was rolling over in the blonde's arms, turning to face her.

"What did Octavia say?" Lexa asked.

"She said that it's worse than what she told Indra. My mother is holding an election to allow the people to choose whether she or Kane should lead our people, but Pike is running for chancellor alongside them," Clarke said.

"Is he not being punished for his crimes?" Lexa asked angrily.

"He is. He's being held in a prison cell right now, but apparently some of his followers have suggested that his name be placed on the ballot as well," Clarke said.

"Who would vote for a prisoner?" Lexa asked.

"Anyone who doesn't agree with my mom and Kane's agenda. Anyone who doesn't like the grounders," Clarke said.

"If he wins, Clarke, there will be a war," Lexa said softly, "And if there is a war with the Skaikru, my people may not take too kindly to you staying here. I may not be able to protect you."

"I understand that," Clarke said, "Which is why I'm going back to Arkadia with Octavia. Tomorrow at dawn."

"What? You're leaving?" Lexa asked.

Clarke couldn't help but cringe when she noticed the disappointment flickering like the candlelight in Lexa's green eyes. Lexa knew she would most likely have to part with Clarke eventually if a war broke out between their people, but the blonde could tell that the commander did not expect her to be leaving so soon.

"Yes, Lexa, but not for long. I just have to go back to Arkadia to fix this problem before things get out of hand, and we get torn apart by a war that neither of us can stop. I want to be the ambassador for the thirteenth clan, and I want to be with you. I don't want anyone getting in the way of that," Clarke said.

"Then, I will arrange for you to take our fastest horses," Lexa said, "Just promise me that you will come back."

"I will always come back to you, Lexa," Clarke said.

She leaned over to place a kiss on Lexa's soft pink lips before lying back down to go to sleep. She smiled when she felt Lexa curl into her side, and she played with Lexa's brunette locks until she fell asleep.


	14. Chapter 14

After riding quickly through the forest for hours on end, Clarke and Octavia finally arrived at Arkadia. It was nearing evening as the two girls guided their horses straight up to the gates. Guns were pointed at them, as the guards assumed they were grounders, but the weapons were immediately lowered at the realization of who Clarke was. Soon enough, the gates were being opened, and Clarke and Octavia got down from their horses, handing them off to a stable boy as they were led inside. Abby was waiting for them with Bellamy and Raven close by, and the older woman instantly enveloped Clarke in a hug at the sight of her.

"Clarke, what's going on? Is Lexa okay?" Abby asked.

"Yes. She's fine. Angry and upset, but fine," Clarke said.

"This is about Pike, isn't it?" Abby said.

"Yes," Clarke confirmed.

"Bellamy told me that Octavia had gone to Polis to inform you of what has been going on, but I didn't expect you to be returning with her," Abby said, "I'm sorry this happened."

"It's okay. You were gone while it happened. Because of me and Lexa. It's not your fault," Clarke said.

Abby nodded, and Clarke turned to look at her friends.

"Would you guys mind telling me exactly what happened?" Clarke asked.

"Pike and the other Farm Station survivors joined us a few months ago, and they hated the grounders because they landed in Ice Nation territory and were attacked. We tried to show them that the grounders won't bother us if we don't bother them and that the grounders aren't all bad, and we have been living peacefully for a while now. But word somehow got out that you were with the commander. Nobody knows why or for how long, but Pike tried to convince people that the commander captured you, and we had to fight to get you back," Raven explained.

"Not a lot of people believed it of course," Bellamy continued, "There was no proof, but Pike's people believed it instantly. He tried to talk me into going with them because he knows I have pull with what's left of the original hundred. He tried to tell me that we should destroy the grounders for supposedly capturing you, but I didn't listen to him."

"Once Abby left camp, Pike saw that as his time to strike," Octavia said, "He gathered his people and snuck out to attack a Trikru village. Luckily, Bellamy heard them talking, so we knew exactly where they were going. We had horses, but the others had to go on foot, so we easily beat them there and were able to warn the Trikru villagers about what was coming for them, but Pike and his band of fools still burnt down many of their homes and their food supply."

"This man needs to be stopped. No one will be voting for him when I am done here," Clarke said, "Before I talk to our people though, I wanted to let you know, Mom, that Lexa has offered the Skaikru a place in her coalition, and I strongly suggest that we take it."

"What would that mean? That we would follow Lexa?" Abby asked.

"Yes," Clarke said.

"Would this not solve our problem then? If Lexa is our leader, then Pike will not be able to lead," Abby said.

"That's not exactly how it works. Yes, Lexa would be our commander, but the Skaikru still needs its own leader," Clarke explained.

"You can tell Lexa that Marcus and I would love it if Skaikru was to become the thirteenth clan," Abby said, "But a lot of people here are starting to show support for Pike. How are we going to stop him?"

"I'll stop him," Clarke said, "Call everyone for a meeting."

"What are you going to say, Clarke?" Bellamy asked, "I've tried this already. Many of our people still refuse to listen to reason."

"Clarke is not going to say anything," the blonde replied, "Wanheda is."

* * *

Clarke stood in a big room in the Ark that was used as the assembly room. She was positioned in the front on a raised platform beside Abby as she looked out over the crowd of people that had gathered to hear her mother's message. Many people were surprised to see Clarke standing beside the other woman, and some people looked as if they didn't want her there. She intended to fix that soon enough.

"People of Arkadia," Abby began, "I have gathered you all here today due to the recent events that have transpired here, but most of all, I have gathered you because my daughter has returned, and she has a message that I think all of you will want to hear."

Abby nodded to Clarke, and the younger girl stepped forward, gazing out into the sea of faces that were now watching her. She didn't miss the sneers that people shot her as they noticed her clothes and hair. She knew she looked like a grounder, but she was going to make these people see that she was not to be messed with.

"The rumors that have supposedly been going around the camp in the last couple days are true. I have come into contact with the commander again, but contrary to Pike's ridiculous beliefs, she was not holding me hostage. I was returning to Polis with her when I received news of Pike's absurd antics back here. The commander has offered us a place in the coalition, and we are going to take it because that is the best option for our people. This way, we will not be at risk of a war breaking out between us and the grounders because _we_ will be grounders, and we will also be open to trade with them, which will be extremely useful to us for our survival during the winter time. For these reasons and many more, Skaikru _will_ become the thirteenth clan," Clarke said.

"How can we ever trust the commander? She left us to die at the mountain," a voice called out.

A chorus of people cried out in agreement, and Clarke steeled her features, waiting for them to quiet down so she could put them all in their place. She clenched her hands into fists when she heard a very familiar voice speak up next.

"Why should we listen to you? You walked out on us ages ago. You're not our leader anymore," Jasper said.

"No, I'm not. My mother is, but I will be the ambassador of our people once we are initiated into the coalition," Clarke said.

"Your mother won't be in charge for much longer either. We'll never be the thirteenth clan. We'll vote for Pike," Jasper said, and there were murmurs of agreement throughout the crowd.

"Pike is a prisoner here, which means that he is not eligible for election. His name will not be included on the ballot, and anyone who decides to write it in will join him in a prison cell," Clarke said sternly.

Many people dropped their gazes at the tone of Clarke's voice, and she was pleased to see that many of them were people who had spoken out against her only moments ago. They were afraid of her, and that was exactly the reaction that Clarke was hoping for. It was the only way she could keep them under control. However, this threat was not enough to stop Jasper.

"You can't expect us to listen to you. You killed everyone in that mountain. Even the people that helped us!" he shouted.

"You're right. I did," Clarke said, not allowing herself to show any remorse, "I killed everyone in that mountain to save my people. I am Wanheda, the commander of death, and I will not hesitate to kill anyone who tries to resist my mother or Kane's rule or the commander's coalition. Is that clear?"

Clarke was met with a chorus of agreements, and even Jasper lowered his head in defeat, choosing not to argue with her anymore. She knew she was being hard on the boy, but she knew that she needed to do what was right for her people and for Lexa, and to do that, she had to make sure that the Skaikru became the thirteenth clan.

"Then, you are dismissed," Clarke said.

Abby remained by Clarke's side until most of the people in the room had filed out, and Clarke could finally drop her stern expression.

"That was so badass, Clarke!" Raven exclaimed, "They're all afraid of you."

"Yeah. I don't think anyone will be voting for Pike after that," Octavia said.

"Where did you learn to be so scary?" Bellamy asked.

"Lexa," Clarke answered simply.

It was the truth. After watching Lexa shift between the girl she knew so well and the ruthless commander, it had become second nature to Clarke to do the same. She had tried her best to copy her girlfriend's daunting commander posture as well as she could, and she made sure to speak with an authoritative voice that left no room for questions.

"That was scarier than Lexa," Raven said.

"That's just because you know what a big softie Lexa is now," Clarke said.

"You did do a great job with them," Abby said, "I don't know if I could've done better myself. It seems you have a natural talent for leading"

"Lexa said something similar once," Clarke said, and Abby gave her a soft smile.

"So what now?" Abby asked.

"Now, I talk to Pike," Clarke said.

* * *

The guards nodded to Clarke as they let her into the cell where Pike was being held. He immediately got to his feet, but she knew that he could not get to her due to thehandcuffs around his wrists and the shackles on his ankles.

"You have returned from wherever you were hiding out with the commander," Pike stated.

"How did you know that I was in contact with the commander?" Clarke asked.

"I heard Abby talking to Raven one night. She said she was going to check up on the commander the next day, and Raven told her to say hi to Clarke for her," he said.

"So you made up a rumor that the commander was holding me hostage?" Clarke asked.

"It was the only way to make them follow me. Many people were angry with you for disappearing, but it suddenly didn't matter. All that mattered was that the grounders had taken one of our own, and our people wanted revenge," Pike said, "Lots of people here still don't trust the grounders after what happened at the mountain. It wasn't that hard to convince them that I was right."

"Well, people will be learning to trust the grounders, you included, because we are becoming the thirteenth clan in the commander's coalition," Clarke said.

"You're making a mistake. We can't trust these people. How can you ever trust this commander of theirs after she betrayed you at the mountain? How do you know she won't betray us again the first chance she gets?"

"The commander and I are on great terms at the moment, and you would do well to be respectful of her. She did what she had to do at the mountain, just as I did. I cannot blame her for putting her people first, and I am sure she will not betray us again in the future because we will be her people too," Clarke said.

"Think about what you're doing here. These people are savages, and we need to wipe them out before they wipe us out," Pike argued.

"I don't know what twisted reality you are living in, but you obviously haven't been listening to me. We will be living at peace with the grounders as the thirteenth clan, and you are not going to act against that. Any act against them will be seen as an act of war and will be punishable by death."

"My name is going to be on the ballots for the election in two days. If I am elected, I will lead my people as I see fit."

"I already took care of that. Your name will not appear on the ballot, and I have already told our people that anyone who votes for you will be joining you in this cell. Now, you can either swear your loyalty to the new chancellor, or you can die here and now by my hand," Clarke threatened.

Pike hesitated to answer, looking completely bewildered at how quickly the tables had turned. He had been smug the whole time because he knew he would probably win the election, but now that his chances at that were gone, he didn't know what else he could do.

"I will be loyal to the new chancellor, but not because of you," he finally said, "I will be loyal to my chancellor because I always have been. I know that the chancellor knows what is right for us. I was only trying to help because I thought your mother was making a mistake."

"If she knows what is best, then she is never making a mistake," Clarke said harshly, "I will be staying here for a few more days to make sure everything stays under control, but you will remain loyal until the end of your days, do you understand? Even after I have gone back to Polis because if I ever hear word of you setting a toe out of line again, I will not hesitate to come back here and kill you myself."

Clarke whipped around, storming out of the cell and down the hallway. Once she was out of view from the guards, she allowed herself to smile at the look of fear she had seen on Pike's face. Her friends were right. Her people found her intimidating. Lexa would be so proud.

* * *

That night, Clarke laid in her bed all alone, awake and staring at the ceiling. She couldn't get comfortable because of the glaring absence of a certain brunette girl beside her. She hadn't fallen asleep without Lexa in a month and a half, and she didn't know if she even could anymore. She hadn't spent a day without Lexa since the brunette found her in the woods all those weeks ago, and she was now being reminded of why she never wanted to leave the other girl again. Clarke sighed, pushing up out of her bed and stumbling into the hallway. She hoped that a walk around the Ark would clear her mind of a certain commander so that she could get a bit of rest. After a few minutes of walking, she rounded a corner and almost ran right into her mother.

"Mom. What are you doing up?" Clarke asked.

"I was thirsty," Abby explained, raising up the glass of water that she had been holding, "Why are you awake?"

"Honey, are you alright?" Abby asked when Clarke didn't answer.

Clarke numbly shook her head, and she felt the tears that had been burning behind her eyes finally fall. Abby instantly pulled Clarke into her and began to rub her back soothingly.

"Oh, Clarke, what's wrong?" Abby asked.

"I miss Lexa," Clarke sobbed, "I miss her so much, Mom. I don't know if I can sleep without her."

"You'll see her tomorrow, Clarke," Abby said.

"I can't leave tomorrow. I don't know when I can because I have to make sure that things go smoothly here before I can go back. You know that. If I leave, everything might just fall apart again, and I need to stop a war from breaking out before it's too late," Clarke said.

"It's fine, Clarke. I can handle it from here," Abby said.

"I'm staying. I need to make sure that everything works out so that we can be the thirteenth clan. It's the only way that Lexa and I can ever be together," Clarke said.

"If you're sure. You'll get used to being here without her for a while. The first night will be your worst," Abby said, "Why don't you come and sleep with me tonight?"

Clarke pulled back and wiped at her tears, nodding to let Abby know she would join her.

"Thanks, Mom," Clarke said.

"Of course, sweetie," Abby said.

When Clarke settled into Abby's bed with her, she curled into her mother, and her body instantly relaxed at the contact. She began to actually feel sleepy, and she sighed in relief. As she was lulled to sleep by the comforting warmth of her mother beside her, the last thing she wondered was if Lexa was having a hard time as well. Little did she know, Lexa was curled up in her bed in Polis, sleeping soundly, with the sheets Clarke had used the night before clutched tightly to her chest because they still carried the blonde's comforting scent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the new chapter! Thanks for reading!


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In honor of my birthday being today, I have decided to give you all a present lol. An early update! Sorry it's a little short, but I will still be doing my usual Thursday update as well. Thanks for reading, and enjoy!

Clarke was glad to find that the election went smoothly. Kane was chosen as the chancellor, and only two people voted for Pike. Clarke made good on her promise and threw them into the cell with him. The next day, Pike and all his followers received their punishment in the form of shock lashing. Two days later, and there had been no trouble, but Clarke resolved to stay for a couple more days just to be sure. However, at the moment, she was seriously regretting that decision. She was sitting on a rock on the outskirts of Arkadia, hoping to have a moment to herself. She missed Lexa so much. It felt like someone had taken all her oxygen, and she could no longer breathe. She had been without Lexa for five days now, and her mother was right that the first night was the worst, but it wasn't getting much better. She wished she didn't feel such a sense of loyalty to her people so that she wouldn't feel the need to stay here, but she knew that this was just a part of who she was, and she could never change it. She closed her eyes and tried to imagine Lexa's strong arms around her, but before long, she sensed someone approaching, and she looked up to see it was Raven.

"You doing okay?" Raven asked.

"Yeah," Clarke answered.

"Your mom said you've been missing Lexa," Raven commented.

"I have. It's hard being without her after having been alone with her every day for so long," Clarke said, "I wish I could just go home."

She said it before she could stop herself, and she looked guiltily at Raven, hoping the other girl wouldn't feel betrayed at this new information that the blonde no longer thought of Arkadia as her home.

"To Polis," Raven stated.

"To Lexa," Clarke corrected, "Lexa is my home now."

"I understand," Raven said, "I wouldn't mind seeing her again myself."

Clarke nodded, and then they devolved into a peaceful silence, looking out over their people. Clarke gazed out over a group of children kicking a ball through the grass, and she envied their innocence. They hadn't really encountered the harshness of life on the ground, and Clarke hoped, for their sake, they never would. She would try her best to make sure that these children would grow up in a time of peace.

"I know there's nothing I can do to get you back to Lexa faster, but I do have some good news for you," Raven announced.

"Yes?" Clarke asked.

"We want to come to Polis with you. Me, Bellamy, and Octavia. Bellamy said you told him on the night that we visited you that we could come live there permanently, and we've decided to take you up on that offer," Raven said.

"Are you sure?" Clarke asked, "You guys want to leave Arkadia just like that?"

"Arkadia was never really a home to any of us. On the Ark, Octavia lived under the floor, Bellamy spent his whole life worrying about her, and I would be dead by now if it weren't for Finn. We've never belonged here either, and we've all decided that we want to try and start over in Polis," Raven said.

"That would be amazing," Clarke said, "I'm sure Lexa would love that as well."

"We won't be coming right away. We'll stay here for a few more weeks to make sure everyone stays in line, and we'll meet you in Polis once we're sure Octavia won't have to take any last minute horse rides to warn you of something or other," Raven laughed.

"Yes. That would be nice," Clarke said.

After that, they fell back into silence, and Clarke thought of her friends coming to join her in Polis. Now, she would be able to live there with not only the love of her life, but also the people she had come to love in her time on the ground. However, at the thought of Polis, Clarke couldn't help but think about how she wished she could be looking into a very expressive pair of green eyes, and her smile fell.

"Don't worry, Clarke," Raven said, "You'll see her soon."

"I know," Clarke said.

As she settled into Raven's warm embrace, she hoped that things in Arkadia would go smoothly for the next couple of days so that she could go home to her girlfriend.

* * *

As the ambassadors for the twelve clans left the room, Lexa remained seated in her throne, staring off into oblivion. She couldn't help but be worried about Clarke. The blonde had been gone for five days now, and Lexa couldn't push the thought out of her mind that her girlfriend had been hurt. If whatever Clarke was planning did not succeed, and Pike became the new chancellor of the Skaikru, then Clarke could very well be dead by now. Lexa hoped it did not come down to that and that the young leader was alive and well. However, with the pass of each day, Lexa had to try harder and harder to restrain herself from riding out to Arkadia to make sure the love of her life was safe. Lexa was brought out of her reverie when she felt a hand on her arm.

"I'm sure Clarke will be fine, Heda," Aden said.

"How long have you been here, Aden?" Lexa asked.

"Long enough to know you are worried about something," Aden said, "It's Clarke, isn't it?"

"Fine. I am worried about Clarke. I do not like the idea of her dealing with the traitorous Skaikru on her own," Lexa said, "I don't want her to get hurt."

"You love her," Aden deduced.

"Very perceptive, Aden," Lexa said.

"I'm sorry, Heda," Aden said, and she could see that the young boy was afraid he had upset her.

"I am not mad," Lexa said, "I just wish for you to keep this information between us for now."

"For now? You're going to tell everyone then?" Aden asked.

"Yes. Once the Skaikru has been initiated into the coalition."

"They're becoming the thirteenth clan?"

"Only if Clarke is able to talk some sense into them without getting herself killed," Lexa said, swallowing thickly.

She took a moment to blink back the tears that had formed in her eyes at the thought of never seeing Clarke again. Aden gave her a moment to revel in her thoughts before he spoke up beside her.

"Clarke will be okay. She will take care of it," Aden reassured his mentor, "I have heard the stories of the great Wanheda who felled the mountain, and that woman would never be taken out by a band of rebels."

"You are right, Aden. Clarke is strong, and I know I am just being silly. But when you love someone, it is second nature to worry about them. You'll understand one day," Lexa smiled warmly, "However, I would like something to take my mind off of such things. What do you say we go have dinner?"

"Sha, Heda," Aden said, smiling as well.

As Lexa walked beside Aden out of the throne room, she let out a breath she didn't know she had been holding. She was glad Aden had come along to take her mind off of her overwhelming thoughts. She knew she was worrying for nothing. Clarke would be fine.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the chapter many of you have been waiting for. Clarke and Lexa are reunited! Enjoy!

Clarke breathed out a sigh of relief when she finally reached the gates of Polis. She barely registered anything as she was herded through the gates, and her horse was taken from her. She just had one goal, and that was to get back to the tower she now thought of as home. She pushed her way through the marketplace, nodding at anyone who shouted to her, and she nearly cried tears of joy when she saw the woman who was waiting for her at the tower's base, seemingly having been informed that she had returned. The people of Polis had been kind and friendly to her as she greeted them on her way to the tower, and she really hoped Lexa didn't mind her showing them that she cared about their Heda. She flew into Lexa's arms, and Lexa stumbled back a step at the force before clutching tightly to Clarke. The blonde clung to the commander as the people watched on.

"You have no idea how much I want to kiss you right now," Clarke whispered in her ear.

"You might as well," Lexa murmured in reply, "I think the people can already see how much we care for each other."

Clarke pulled back to look into beautiful green eyes that she had been missing for too long, wanting to make sure that the brunette commander was absolutely certain. Lexa gave her a small nod, and Clarke crashed their lips together, tangling her fingers into Lexa's intricately braided hair as she pulled her in for a searing kiss. After a few seconds, Clarke finally remembered where she was, and she pulled away, looking warily at the people who were watching them curiously. She was shocked when the people burst into cheers, and they started chanting for their Heda. Lexa held up a hand to bring them to silence.

"As you can all see now, I love Klark kom Skaikru," Lexa announced, "She has proven herself to be a good equal for me when she felled the mountain and saved us all. I hope you will find her to be worthy of me."

"Sha, Heda," the people replied.

"Very well," Lexa said when no one spoke out against it, "Return to what you were doing."

At Lexa's dismissal, the people who had stopped to watch her and Clarke turned back to what they had previously been doing. Clarke turned back to Lexa to find her wearing a knowing smirk.

"You knew they would accept this," Clarke realized, "How?"

"I brought up my decision to initiate Skaikru as the thirteenth clan at my latest war council meeting, and it was approved unanimously. No one spoke out against my decision, not even the Ice Queen," Lexa said happily, "Although I do believe Nia has something up her sleeve and will most likely try to sabotage the Summit, but Roan has already agreed that if she tries to mess things up, he will be willing to challenge her and take her place. Yesterday, I made the announcement to the people here that you would be staying with us after the Summit as the ambassador for your people, and they all easily accepted it. The people actually seemed to want you here. You have made quite a name for yourself, Clarke."

"That's amazing," Clarke said, "I'm just glad they're okay with, you know, us."

"I am as well," Lexa said, "Now, would you like me to show you around Polis, my love? It is where you will be staying from now on."

"I would like that very much, thank you," Clarke said.

Lexa grabbed Clarke's hand and led her through the marketplace. There were people everywhere, and Clarke was in awe at how this primitive way of life seemed to bring such peace for them. They all loved Lexa, many of them smiling at her or shouting friendly greetings as they went along, and Clarke could see now why they accepted her relationship with Lexa so easily. They just wanted their Heda to be happy.

As they walked, something caught Clarke's eye at a weapons stand, and she decided to tug Lexa over to it so that she could get a closer look. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Lexa giving her a questioning glance, but Clarke kept her eyes on the weapon that had stood out to her. It was a bow and arrow, but this one had a much better structure than the one she had gotten at the trading post months ago, and the arrows were crafted better.

"Would you like to try it?" the man at the stand asked as he noticed what she was staring at.

"Yes, please," Clarke said.

He handed her the bow, and she let go of Lexa's hand to hold it. There was a target set up next to the stand so that people could try out the weapons before buying them, and Lexa watched on as Clarke nocked an arrow, carefully taking aim before letting it fly. It landed in the center of the target with a thunk. Clarke squealed in delight as she pulled out the arrow before turning back to the man and realizing she had nothing to offer him.

"What do you want for it?" she asked anyway.

"Nothing. It is all yours, Wanheda," he said.

"That's alright," Clarke said, "I can't just take it."

"Please," the man insisted, "My sister was a prisoner in the mountain, and you saved her life. It is the least I can do."

"I didn't save her," Clarke said, "Your commander did."

"No. Heda told us it was your plan to take down the mountain in the first place. Without you, we would've never even been able to get close to the Maunon. Besides, you defeated the Maunon, so they can never attack us again. We all owe you, Wanheda."

He bowed his head to her as he said this, and she finally accepted the bow, to his delight.

"Mochof," she said as she took it.

"Pro, Wanheda," he said.

Clarke and Lexa said goodbye to the man before continuing their walk through the marketplace. Slinging the bow and arrows over her back, Clarke turned to Lexa, noticing the smile that was now occupying her face.

"You told your people that it was my plan to take down the mountain?" Clarke asked.

"It is true," Lexa said.

"You could give yourself some credit," Clarke said, "You helped me come up with that plan."

"You mean, I tried to help," Lexa said, "You shot down most of my ideas. The plan was yours, Clarke, and I didn't want to take credit for what you did."

"You're so sweet, you know that?" Clarke said with a huge smile on her face.

"Only to you," Lexa answered.

Clarke leaned over to kiss her on the cheek, and Lexa smiled wider than she already was. It was at that moment that Clarke's stomach growled, and she instinctively looked around the marketplace for a source of food.

"I'm hungry," Clarke said.

"I gathered that by the noise your stomach just made," Lexa said.

Clarke playfully shoved her as Lexa pulled her to a stand where they could get some food. Clarke picked out some meat that looked the same as what she had tried when she first came to Polis, and she was pleased to find that it was just as good this time around. She had to stop a moan from escaping her lips at the delicious taste, and she turned to Lexa, who was eating beside her.

"What is this stuff?" Clarke asked.

"It is cow meat, Clarke," Lexa explained.

"Steak," Clarke realized, and Lexa cocked her head at the term.

"It's what we used to call this stuff on the Ark," Clarke explained, "We didn't have it often. We didn't have meat in general often. We'd get our source of nutrients through protein packets and similar things, but we did have a few animals on the Ark, and so we'd have meat on very special occasions, like Unity Day. It was my favorite food."

"Living on the Ark sounds like something I would not enjoy," Lexa admitted, "I love meat very much."

"Which is why I'm glad you can eat it again," Clarke said, reaching up to ghost her fingers along Lexa's previously injured jaw, "It doesn't hurt anymore, does it? It never bothers you when you chew?"

"I am fine, Clarke. I promise," Lexa said.

Clarke and Lexa ate the rest of their meal in peaceful silence, and Clarke knew that she could most definitely get used to having meals like this. When they were finished, Lexa began to lead Clarke away, but the blonde stopped her.

"Wait. Don't we have to pay for this somehow?" Clarke asked.

Lexa blinked at her. "I am Heda, Clarke. I do not have to trade for things."

"That hardly seems fair," Clarke said.

"Clarke, I lead my people. That is what I do for them, and you know that is not an easy job. They like to do things for me in return, and so I let them. If you are to be my Hedatu someday, you'd better get used to the special treatment," Lexa teased.

Before Clarke could respond, she was interrupted by a young blond boy calling for Lexa. He stopped in front of her, and she ruffled his hair before he noticed Clarke standing beside her.

"I'm sorry, Heda. I didn't know you were busy," he said.

"You are fine, Aden. I have not forgotten about our training session," Lexa said before turning to her girlfriend, "Clarke, this is Aden. He is the most promising of my novitiates. In the event that I should die, he will most likely succeed me."

"Hello, Aden," Clarke said.

"Wanheda," Aden acknowledged, "It is nice to finally meet you when I have heard so much about you. Heda speaks of you a lot. She has it bad for you."

Lexa glared at him, and he smiled as Clarke laughed aloud, noticing that Lexa was on very familiar terms with her nightbloods.

"I know she does," Clarke said, squeezing Lexa's hand.

"Anyway, I have promised to train with the natblidas this evening. I hope you don't mind," Lexa said, "Would you like to come and watch?"

Clarke nodded, and she and Lexa began to follow Aden through the busy marketplace to a more secluded clearing. Clarke noticed many more young kids waiting there for Lexa with a bald man wearing robes.

"Heda, I have received word that you announced your love for Wanheda to all the people in Polis," the man said angrily, "What were you thinking?"

"You would do well to respect my decisions, Titus. If you continue to speak out against me, I will not hesitate to put you in a cell," Lexa threatened.

"Remember my teachings, Heda," Titus said, "Love is weakness."

"You're the one who put that bullshit idea in her head?!" Clarke exploded, "Love is not weakness. Love is strength! Loving each other has made both of us stronger, and you need to respect that. She is your commander, and you need to do as she says without trying to manipulate her to do what you want!"

Clarke took a deep breath to try and calm down, and she succeeded when she caught sight of Lexa next to her, trying not to smile.

"Sha, Wanheda," Titus said, "I am sorry."

"Titus, why don't you return home? I think we will be fine from here," Lexa said before Clarke could say anything else.

Titus bowed to Lexa and left the clearing, and Lexa finally let her smile show. All the nightbloods started talking at once, laughing and praising Clarke for her words, and she gathered that they did not really like Titus either. It wasn't hard to see why because it appeared that he constantly questioned Lexa's authority. Clarke resolved never to let him "teach" Lexa anything ever again.

Clarke sat down on a rock to watch as Lexa began her training session with the nightbloods. She enjoyed the way the sinking sun danced in her girlfriend's hair as she ducked and twirled, sparring with a young girl. Lexa made sure to spend time sparring one-on-one with each of the nightbloods. While she worked with one of the nightbloods, the rest of them picked a sparring partner and sparred amongst each other. They were really great warriors, and Clarke could tell that they were trained better than any of the other warriors she had seen on the ground. She really hoped that Lexa would train her in the same manner someday. After a while, Aden broke apart from the group and made his way over to stand in front of Clarke.

"Heda said that I could be done for today, and she asked me to spar with you if you would like to," Aden said.

"Sure," Clarke said.

She knew she was about to get her butt kicked by a fourteen year old, but she also knew that it would be good practice for her to spar with someone that had been well-trained, and she could admit that it would be fun. She grabbed a sword and swung it at Aden, but he was prepared, easily blocking her strike before delivering a strike of his own. Remembering what Lexa had taught her so far, she easily stepped to the side, grabbing for his sword arm as he swung. However, he was too fast, twisting out of her grip before she could even touch him, and she knew she was in for an intense training session. Clarke sparred with Aden until Lexa finished her lesson with the nightbloods. She even beat him a few times, but he didn't mind. He seemed happy that she was learning. Clarke was just pleased that she got to spend time with him because he was very sweet, and he was obviously quite special to Lexa.

* * *

Once Clarke and Lexa got up to their room that night, Clarke was relieved to finally be alone with her girlfriend after being away for a week. She had fun today, walking the streets of Polis and training with the nightbloods, but Clarke would be lying if she said that she had not been waiting to be left alone with Lexa since the moment she got there.

"I have been waiting all day to do this," Clarke said, pulling Lexa into her for a passionate kiss.

She moved her lips against Lexa's in absolute delight, groaning when the brunette pulled away. That was, until she noticed the look on her girlfriend's face, and the groan died in her throat.

"Is something wrong, Lex?" Clarke asked.

"Earlier today, when I asked my people if they thought you were worthy of me, it was just something I had to do. To make sure they approved of our relationship. I know that you are more than worthy of me. I am the one who is not worthy of you," Lexa said.

"Has this been bothering you all day?" Clarke asked knowingly.

Lexa hesitated before giving an affirmative nod.

"You're adorable," Clarke said, shaking her head, "You are more than worthy of me, Lexa. You're perfect, and I love you more than anything."

"I love you too, Clarke," Lexa said, grinning.

"I think we've done enough talking for now though, don't you?" Clarke asked, eager to feel Lexa against her again.

Lexa nodded enthusiastically, and Clarke reattached their lips. The blonde was already fumbling with the straps on Lexa's armor as she pushed the commander down onto the bed.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With the finale being tonight, I don't know whether to feel excited or upset. On one hand, I cannot wait to see Clexa on my screen again, but on the other, I am not ready to lose Lexa again, this time forever. I really wish JRot wouldn't have thrown away such a beautiful love story! No matter what happens tonight, I hope you enjoy this new chapter! Thank you all for reading and supporting this story!

Clarke followed Lexa out of the tower to find her mother getting down from a horse. She and Kane had just arrived in Polis for the Summit that would be taking place in three days' time, and Clarke couldn't hold back her excitement at seeing her mother again.

"Hey, Mom," Clarke said, pulling Abby in for a hug.

"How are you, baby?" Abby asked.

"Great," Clarke said, pulling back from the hug, "I'm so glad you could make it for the Summit. You'll love it here in Polis."

"I'm sure I will," Abby said before turning to Lexa, "Come here, Lexa."

Lexa glanced around at her warriors, and Clarke could tell she was debating on whether or not to hug Abby in front of them. However, she relented and made her way into Abby's waiting arms. Abby ran a hand over Lexa's hair before pulling back, and Clarke was glad that her mother had taken to like Lexa.

"How have you been doing, Lexa? It's not bothering you anymore, is it?" Abby asked, referring to her jaw, making sure to be discrete in case any of the people of Polis were listening.

"I am fine, Abby," Lexa said, "Thank you for everything though."

"Hello, Clarke. Commander," Marcus said as he came over to join them.

"Hey, Marcus. How was your ride to Polis?" Clarke asked.

"Smooth. Uninterrupted," Marcus answered, "It's amazing here though. Will we be staying in this tower?"

"Yes. The commander has already arranged some of the guest rooms for you," Clarke said, "Would you like me to take you there now?"

"That would be lovely, sweetheart," Abby said, "Perhaps after dinner tonight, you can show us around the city."

Clarke smiled and was about to respond with how she would love to when she heard Lexa's surprised gasp from somewhere behind her. Clarke turned in horror to see the glint of metal at her girlfriend's throat. Looking behind the brunette, she found none other than Pike. Clarke could see green eyes already beginning to calculate a way to escape, but before she could move, Pike grabbed her right arm and twisted it behind her, catching her off guard, and she bit back a cry of pain. Clarke did not hear the bone snap so she knew the arm wasn't broken, but it looked as if Pike had successfully dislocated the brunette's shoulder, as her right arm was now dangling uselessly. Ryder and Indra, the warriors who had escorted Kane and Abby into Polis, began to charge Pike, but Pike held up his arm, gesturing for them to stop.

"If you come one step closer, your commander dies," Pike threatened, and they froze on the spot.

"What the hell do you want, Pike?" Clarke asked, stepping forward.

"What I've always wanted. For these savages to die," Pike said, "Skaikru will not become the thirteenth clan if I can help it. Since I lost the election, and Kane here is adamant that we make peace with the grounders, we will. This girl will surrender, and I will be the new commander."

Lexa locked eyes with Clarke, and the blonde knew that her girlfriend would never surrender her position as commander. Clarke could tell though that Lexa wasn't as brave as she was pretending to be. Her face and eyes remained emotionless during Pike's speech, but Clarke caught the slight quiver of Lexa's lips when he mentioned that he wanted to be the new commander, and Clarke knew this was a sign that the other girl was afraid. Clarke wondered how on earth Lexa managed to look so brave in this moment because the blonde was one step away from trembling in fear for her girlfriend. Clarke fixed Lexa with a stern look that told her to just go with whatever Pike told her to do. Clarke figured Lexa probably couldn't do much without her dominant arm when she had a knife pressed to her throat. She knew Lexa was strong, but so was Pike, and Clarke hated to say it, but Pike had the advantage right now. Even if Lexa could get away, Clarke didn't want her to chance it just yet.

"Charles, stand down," Kane said authoritatively, "We are not here to attack the commander."

"And you are not in charge right now," Pike said, "Seems to me that I have the upper hand at the moment if you value the commander's life."

"How the hell did you even get in here?" Clarke asked.

"He must have followed us," Abby said.

"You're right," Pike said, "I followed you all the way here, and when I got to the gates, the guards thought nothing of it. All I had to do was say I was with the Skaikru."

"You think these people are going to accept you as their new commander?" Kane asked.

"If they want their old one to live, then yes," Pike said, "I won't hesitate to kill her at the first sign of rebellion."

"So you're just going to keep her prisoner?" Clarke asked.

Pike nodded, and Clarke could see the fire burning in the green eyes that she knew so well. Pike inclined his head to Ryder and Indra.

"You two will now take me to the commander's throne room," he said, "No one else is to come. If I catch sight of anyone other than you, your beloved commander will breathe her last."

Lexa gave Clarke a pointed look, and Clarke knew exactly what she was thinking. She thought she could take Pike out herself. She might have been able to get away from Pike, but Clarke could see the man's gun holstered at his waist, and she knew that he would not hesitate to whip it out and shoot Lexa at the first sign of trouble. Clarke gave Lexa a sharp shake of her head. She could tell the brunette girl didn't like it, but she didn't argue as Pike pushed her into the tower, followed by the two warriors.

"Should we go after them?" Abby asked.

"We can't," Clarke argued, "If he sees us, he'll kill her. She can probably outfight him, but he has a gun. If he gets ahold of that, she's a goner."

"We have to do something," Abby protested, "We can't just let him have her."

" _We_ don't have to do anything," Clarke said, "I do."

"Clarke, you're not going after them all by yourself."

"Mom, I have to. I know a back way to the throne room. If I go now, I can make it there before them. I'll be careful. I promise."

"Clarke, you can't—" Abby objected, but Clarke was already slipping into the tower.

She took the back staircase and hurriedly ran up the stairs. She was trembling, and she knew it was because she was about to go out of her mind with fear. She couldn't lose Lexa. Not after everything they'd been through. She couldn't have everything taken away from her when she had just found it. She knew that worrying wouldn't help her though, and she tried to calm down as she ran up the stairs, formulating different plans in her head that could get Lexa away from that horrible man. Her feet ached, and she was starting to sweat as she ran up and up the endless amount of stairs, but she knew she needed to be fast if she was going to make it to the throne room before Pike. When she finally reached the top of the stairs, she was breathing heavily, but she knew she couldn't stop now. After running down the hallway, she burst into the throne room, glancing around for a place to hide. The only objects in the room were the thrones, so Clarke hurried over to crouch behind the one on the right side of the room that was the closest to Lexa's own throne. She tried to slow her breathing while she waited for Pike to arrive so that he wouldn't be able to hear her panting gasps for air.

After a few minutes, the doors to the throne room banged open, and Clarke was glad she had managed to get her breathing under control. She watched from the space in between the thrones as Pike marched in with Lexa in front of him and Indra and Ryder following close behind. He made his way over to the balcony behind the commander's throne before turning to face the warriors.

"I am your new commander now, and as my first action, I will send a message to the people of Polis in the form of their previous leader's lifeless body," Pike said, and Clarke's eyes widened in disbelief.

He acted fast, cutting at Lexa's throat with the knife, but Lexa was faster. He only had time to nick her neck before she grabbed onto the arm that was holding it, twisting hard and causing him to drop it. She used his surprise to her advantage, twisting away from him. Clarke watched in horror as he reached for his gun, and she sprang out of her hiding place. She was by his side in an instant, kicking him square in the chest in the hopes that he would fall over the balcony. He stumbled and fell over the edge, but not before he grabbed onto Lexa's arm, pulling her with him. Clarke nearly screamed as she watched the girl she loved falling over the side, and she acted fast, quickly reaching out and grabbing Lexa's hand. Lexa cried out in pain at the feeling of her shoulder being further dislocated.

"I'm sorry, Lexa. I have to," Clarke said, holding on tight.

Lexa nodded, but Clarke was finding that the combined weight of the brunette and Pike was too much for her. She could feel herself getting pulled closer to the edge, and she was afraid for a moment that she was going to fall over as well. She sighed in relief when Ryder wrapped his strong arms around her waist, keeping her grounded. The people of Polis had begun to notice the commotion now, and Clarke could hear them shouting below, but she kept her focus on the two people who were dangling over the edge of the tower. Lexa was kicking at Pike, trying to get free of his grasp, but he somehow held strong.

"Let go of her, Pike!" Clarke shouted, "You're done here!"

"If I go, she's going with me," Pike declared.

Clarke looked around for something she could use to get rid of Pike, so she could get Lexa back on level ground. She knew that if she pulled him up as well, he would immediately pull out his gun, and therefore would probably kill them all. Clarke's eyes landed on Pike's discarded knife lying on the floor a few feet away, and she quickly made eye contact with Indra, hoping she would get the message. Luckily, she nodded, grabbing the knife and bringing it to Clarke. The blonde knew she had one chance at this. She also knew that she might very well hit Lexa, but she knew she had to try, or they would all be dead shortly, and it wouldn't matter.

"I warned you," she said to Pike, causing him to look up at her again.

She quickly reared back her left hand and threw the knife. The steel blade embedded itself in the flesh of Pike's arm, causing him to finally release Lexa, and he screamed as he fell to his death. Lexa reached up with her newly free hand, and Clarke grabbed it, trying to mainly pull her up by her uninjured arm, but she didn't miss the way Lexa's face scrunched up in pain. Soon enough, she was looping an arm around Lexa's waist and pulling her the rest of the way up. Both girls just sat on the ground for a second, breathing quickly from the shock of the situation they had just been in, and then Clarke was throwing her arms around Lexa and crying into her neck, relieved that she was still alive. Lexa whispered soothingly in her ear, trying to act brave in front of Ryder and Indra, but Clarke felt something wet against her face where it was pressed against the commander's, and she knew that the other girl had shed a tear as well. Lexa quickly nudged her face against Clarke's shirt to wipe the tear away so that the others wouldn't see it. After a few more seconds, Clarke pulled back and brought her hands up to cup Lexa's cheeks.

"I thought I was going to lose you today," Clarke said.

"But you didn't," Lexa pointed out, "I am well, Clarke."

"Not completely," Clarke said, "I know he hurt your arm, so don't even try and pretend."

"Yes. My right arm," Lexa admitted, "I can't move it."

Clarke pulled Lexa's sleeve up to inspect the injury. She recognized it instantly as a dislocated shoulder, and she nodded when she found she had been right in her earlier assumption.

"It's already swelling up pretty bad," Clarke commented, "It'd be best if I just fix it for you now."

"What's wrong?" Lexa asked, "Is it broken?"

"Your shoulder is dislocated. All I have to do is pop it back into place. Then, most of the pain you're feeling will go away, and you should be able to move it again," Clarke said, "Don't worry. I know how to do it. I used to help my mom out in medical a lot on the Ark, and this was a common injury."

"Then fix me, Clarke," Lexa said, adjusting her position so that her right arm was facing the blonde.

Clarke expertly popped Lexa's shoulder joint back into its socket, and Lexa hissed in the brief moment of pain. When she felt the pain go away, Lexa looked to Clarke in wonder, and she flexed her arm to find that she could in fact move it again.

"Thank you, Clarke," Lexa said.

Clarke was about to respond when her mother rushed into the room with Kane following behind her. Abby quickly made her way to where Clarke and Lexa were still sitting on the floor, crouching down beside them.

"Lexa, are you alright?" Abby asked, looking over her for wounds, "I know Pike dislocated your shoulder. I can—"

"Mom, I already did it. I popped it back into place," Clarke said.

Abby grabbed onto Lexa's arm, flexing it to make sure that Clarke did it right. Satisfied, she gently lowered it back down to Lexa's side.

"Good job, Clarke," Abby said before turning her attention back to Lexa, "Still, you probably shouldn't move that arm for a few days to let it heal. Come with me to your healer's tent, and I'll make you a sling."

"I will be fine," Lexa assured her, "It already feels much better."

Clarke smiled at Lexa's attempt, but she knew since her mother cared about Lexa now, she would never let the commander off the hook about this.

"Lexa, you are going to take care of this wound to make sure that it heals correctly," Abby said, "Come on."

Lexa glanced helplessly at Clarke, and the blonde just shrugged, knowing that there was no arguing with her mother about this. She had been hurt multiple times, so she knew firsthand what her mother was like in these situations. Lexa finally relented, but not before holding out a hand to Clarke, inviting the younger girl to come with her. The two of them followed Abby, hand in hand, on their way to find Polis' healer.

* * *

Once in the healer's tent, Abby noticed the thin line of black that had oozed from the nick on Lexa's neck. Clarke smiled as her mother fussed over Lexa, cleaning the wound and putting on a small bandage, although it clearly did not need one. Next, Abby grabbed a sling and fitted it to Lexa's arm while Lexa stared at it distastefully, and Clarke had to try hard not to laugh at her adorable girlfriend. After Abby had tied Lexa's right arm comfortably in a sling, she finally left the two of them alone.

"You once told me that when someone saves your life, your people say thank you," Lexa remembered, "so thank you for saving my life today."

"I don't know how you could expect me to do anything else," Clarke said, "I love you. Sorry about your arm though."

"Just because Pike is of the Skaikru does not mean that it is your fault. There is nothing you could've done. He is a traitor, and there was no way you could've known he would follow your mother and Kane here," Lexa said.

"Yes, but I had the chance to kill him," Clarke argued.

"But you didn't. You are merciful, and that's why I love you," Lexa said, "You see the best in people."

"But—"

"My arm is fine, Clarke," Lexa said, "I do not even need this sling. It will only serve to get in the way in the next couple of days. I do not know why I listen to your mother."

"Because deep down, you know that she knows what she's talking about," Clarke said, "And even if you think she doesn't, humor her."

"I will wear it, Clarke," Lexa said, "But that does not mean that I have to like it."

"So I get to deal with grumpy Lexa for the next couple days?" Clarke asked, pinching the brunette's cheek.

Lexa swatted her hand away, but did not deny it. "Perhaps."

Clarke groaned, but was instantly cut off by Lexa's lips on hers. Clarke sighed into the kiss, happy that she was getting the chance to kiss her girlfriend again after almost losing her today. Just as Lexa deepened the kiss, she pulled back and got to her feet, and a whine escaped Clarke's lips before she could stop it.

"We should probably get to dinner," Lexa said, smirking, "Kane and Abby will be waiting for us."

"You did that on purpose," Clarke grumbled.

"I do not know what you are talking about," Lexa said.

The wink that Lexa shot over her shoulder as she left the healer's tent said otherwise. Clarke scoffed before pushing to her feet and hurrying after the brunette. She rolled her eyes as she realized that even though Lexa was being frustrating at the moment, she was just relieved that the beautiful brunette was still alive.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, everyone! I hope you're all having a great week, and I hope you enjoy the new chapter. Thank you all for continuing to read this story. It means a lot to me!

Lexa watched on as the hot poker was pressed into Kane's flesh, sizzling as the chosen symbol for the Skaikru was emblazoned on his skin. Lexa saw Clarke turn to look at her out of the corner of her eyes, so she met the blonde's blue gaze, giving a slight nod in her direction. Clarke smiled in return, and Lexa was glad that the Summit was going smoothly and that the Skaikru was now officially the thirteenth clan. She was even happier that her girlfriend had allowed her to remove her sling before the ceremony. Lexa was just about to address her warriors when Skaikru guards burst through the doors of the throne room.

"What is the meaning of this?" Lexa snarled, upset at the interruption.

"My apologies, Commander, but we have come to tell you of the Ice Nation's attempted attack on our camp. When we were patrolling for the evening, we caught Ice Nation warriors in the woods, waiting to attack our camp as dusk fell. They won't say how, but they had bombs, and they were going to throw them into our camp and take out our people. Luckily, we took hold of them before they could do any harm," one of the guards reported.

Lexa was about to question Nia about this treachery, but the queen beat her to the punch. Nia rose from her chair and strode to the center of the room, turning to address Lexa with a furious expression.

"I lied when I said I wanted the Skaikru to become the thirteenth clan. My plan was to make it look like I supported this so I could send warriors to take out their camp while their leaders were away, and then there would be no more Skaikru, but as my plan has failed, I will speak out against this today," Nia said.

"It's too late, Nia. Skaikru has already taken the brand," Lexa said, "which makes them the thirteenth clan. You're too late."

"Then, I can no longer support this coalition. Azgeda will no longer live under the commander's rule," Nia declared.

"You and I both know that is not part of the agreement. The only way you can back out of the coalition is if it shatters, and the only way for that to happen is if I am removed from power," Lexa said.

"And we both know that I will not be successful in a vote of no confidence today. Therefore, I am calling upon my armies to attack Polis tomorrow at dawn," Nia said.

"No, Mother, let's do this the right way," Roan spoke up, stepping forward, "I challenge you for your position as leader of Azgeda."

"I accept," Nia said easily, "If you win, you will become the new leader of Azgeda, but if I win, Azgeda is able to leave the coalition with no objections."

Nia and Roan looked up to Lexa at this moment, making sure that she would accept their terms to make them official. She gave them a nod to proceed with their challenge.

"Tomorrow afternoon then," Roan said, "Who will be your champion?"

"I have my own nightblood," Nia revealed, and the people in the chamber gasped in shock, "and she will be my champion. Who will fight for you?"

Lexa was as shocked at the news of another nightblood as the rest of her people were, and she had to try hard not to let it show in her eyes how worried she was. If this nightblood won, then she would be eligible to compete in the Conclave after Lexa's death, and if she were to win it, Lexa knew that her legacy would be lost. She could not risk having Nia's nightblood make it out of this fight alive, and in that moment, she knew what she had to do.

"I will," Lexa said.

A stunned silence followed Lexa's words, and she was not surprised that she was met with this reaction. It was not usual for the Heda to be chosen as the champion in a challenge, and it was even less likely for her to volunteer herself. Lexa did not even know if it had ever been done before.

"I will fight for Roan of Azgeda," Lexa declared, "That way, if I lose, then you will get what you really want Nia, and your natblida will have a shot at replacing me."

Nia smiled in glee at Lexa's words, and the brunette avoided Clarke's gaze, hoping the blond girl wouldn't make a scene in front of everyone. However, she knew Clarke wouldn't be able to stop herself from stepping forward after what Lexa had just said.

"What are you talking about?" Clarke asked.

"Nia's nightblood and I will fight to the death tomorrow," Lexa explained.

"No," Clarke said, "You can't. I won't let you."

"I am Heda. I do not need permission," Lexa snarled, "If this is the only way to keep the Ice Nation under control, then it is what I must do. I will see you all tomorrow afternoon at the arena."

With that, Lexa exited the throne room and walked a ways down the corridor, knowing that Clarke would be sure to follow. Sure enough, as people started to file out of the throne room, Clarke made a beeline to Lexa's side. When Clarke reached her, Lexa grabbed the blonde's hand to try and comfort her, but Clarke immediately yanked it away. Lexa could not help but shrink back a little when she realized how angry Clarke really was.

"What the hell are you doing? You can't let Nia's nightblood kill you!" Clarke seethed.

"I won't, Clarke. You've never seen me fight. I will win this," Lexa assured her.

"Lexa, you shouldn't be taking chances like this," Clarke said, "I don't want to lose you."

"I have to do this," Lexa said, "Don't you see that? If that girl doesn't die tomorrow, then she will most likely take the throne when I die, and that cannot happen."

"And if you die in this fight, then you have just made sure that she takes the throne tomorrow," Clarke growled.

"I'm sorry, Clarke. I'm sorry that I've worried you, but I can promise you now that I will not die tomorrow. I will win," Lexa said.

"You promise?" Clarke asked, looking up at Lexa with tears starting to form in the corners of her blue eyes.

Lexa simply nodded, reaching out to wrap her arms around Clarke. The blonde clung to Lexa, burying her face in the commander's coat as she tried not to fall apart. As Lexa held her girlfriend in the quiet of the now abandoned hallway, she could only hope that she would be able to keep the promise she had just made.

* * *

The next day, Clarke found herself standing on the sidelines of an arena as Lexa stood in front of a raised platform, ready to fight. When Titus announced that the fight should begin, Lexa's shoulder pauldron was removed, and she drew her sword. She barely had time to meet Clarke's eyes before the nightblood, Ontari, was coming at her with her own sword. Lexa easily dodged it, ducking under the sword and slashing at Ontari's legs. The younger girl seemed unfazed and drove her sword hilt into Lexa's back, but Lexa barely seemed effected by it, standing back up and meeting Ontari's sword with a clang.

After a few minutes of intense fighting, Lexa managed to get Ontari's sword away from her and quickly picked it up from where it settled upon the ground, leaving Ontari weaponless. The Ice Nation warrior quickly snatched a spear from one of the guards at the edge of the arena and immediately came at Lexa with it. With her long spear, it was easy for her to knock Lexa's swords from her hands, and Clarke could see Lexa panic for an instant. Ontari took advantage of this, clubbing Lexa in the side of the head with the middle of her spear. Lexa was thrown sideways with the impact, landing sprawled out on her stomach, dazed. Clarke's heart jumped in her chest when she saw that Lexa wasn't moving, and time seemed to slow down as Ontari made her way over. As Ontari moved the spear back to stab Lexa, Clarke worried for a moment that this was the end of the girl she loved, but at the last minute, Lexa rolled out of the way. She quickly sprang to her feet, ducking under the spear when Ontari swung it at her, and she ripped it from Ontari's hands. Now, it was the Ice Nation warrior's turn to be caught off guard by a moment of panic, and Lexa didn't waste it, slitting the other girl's throat, even as she tried to duck away.

Ontari fell to the ground, bleeding a river of black across the pavement below, and Clarke laughed in relief as she met Lexa's gorgeous green eyes. The people of Polis began to chant for their Heda, but it was drowned out by the sound of the Ice Queen's outraged cry. Lexa wasted no time in turning to meet Queen Nia's eyes.

"Jus drein jus daun," Lexa said.

Nia's eyes sparked with fury, and she was about to yell out a response when Lexa threw the spear in her direction. It smacked into her chest, pinning her to the chair behind her and effectively killing her. The people resumed their chant, and Lexa announced that Roan was now the king of Azgeda, but Clarke was only half paying attention. She rushed out from her place among the crowd, running to the middle of the arena to meet Lexa. The commander saw her coming, and Clarke literally jumped into her arms. Lexa held on tight as Clarke wrapped her legs around the brunette's waist before kissing her passionately on the mouth, and the people around them cheered. When Clarke finally pulled away, Lexa lowered her gently to the ground and moved her hands to grip Clarke's waist, smiling brightly at her.

"You kept your promise," Clarke said, feeling giddy with relief.

"I did," Lexa said, "And now we can finally have peace."

Clarke's smile matched Lexa's as she brought her hands up to cup her girlfriend's cheeks. She didn't think she had smiled this wide in a long time.

* * *

That night, they had a celebration in Polis in honor of the Summit being successful and the Ice Queen being replaced. For the first time ever, it seemed that the thirteen clans could finally have peace. Clarke enjoyed celebrating with Lexa, Abby, and Marcus, but she had to admit that she had convinced Lexa to have a little too much to drink, while she herself only got buzzed. She wanted Lexa to be able to let loose, and to be honest, she had been very curious to see what a drunk commander would be like. She was not disappointed because it turned out to be quite a hilarious spectacle. While it had been funny to watch Lexa yell at her guards for stealing her shoulder pauldron when it was perched atop her shoulder, the blonde was seriously regretting the decision to get her girlfriend drunk now that she was tired, and Lexa kept refusing to come to bed.

"Come on, Lexa. It's late," Clarke said, "We should seriously go to bed."

"No, Clarke. I have to defeat the Ice Queen," Lexa slurred.

"Lex, she's dead," Clarke said, "You took care of her earlier."

"But what if she was just pretending?" Lexa asked, "What if she's hiding somewhere?"

Clarke groaned and pulled the commander through the streets towards the tower, hoping to get her to bed before she threw up or passed out. However, Lexa had other ideas. Something caught her eye at a jewelry stand, and she pulled Clarke over, picking up a locket.

"We don't need that, love," Clarke said, "Put it back, and let's go."

"No, Clarke, Queen Nia is in here," Lexa whispered, pointing to the part of the locket that would normally hold a picture.

Clarke busted out laughing at the commander's completely serious expression, and Lexa pouted. Clarke wanted to be annoyed, but she was finding it hard to be mad when Lexa was being so cute.

"Queen Nia wouldn't fit in there," Clarke pointed out.

She took the locket from Lexa and opened it up, wanting her girlfriend to see that it was empty, but the minute she opened it, Lexa backed away, stumbling over her own feet and collapsing on the ground. Clarke quickly handed the locket back to its owner and crouched down beside the drunk brunette. She tried to get Lexa to stand, but the commander groaned, bringing her hand up to her forehead.

"Everything's spinning," she said, "I feel sick."

"Walk with me back to the tower, and you can lie down," Clarke told her.

Lexa nodded, allowing Clarke to help her to her feet, where she instantly swayed and would have fallen right back down if Clarke hadn't been there to steady her.

"What's wrong with me? Why can't I stand?" Lexa asked, fear showing in her green eyes.

"You're okay, Lexa. You're just drunk. Very, very drunk," Clarke explained, "I'm assuming you've never been drunk before."

"I couldn't. It would have been unwise. I have never wanted to let my guard down like this, but I trust you, and you wanted me to," Lexa said.

"I'm sorry I pushed so hard for you to do this," Clarke said, "but you don't have to be afraid. Once the alcohol leaves your system, you'll be back to normal."

"Will you carry me, Clarke?" Lexa pleaded.

"I can't, Lexa. You're too heavy," Clarke said, "but I can help you walk back. Just lean on me."

Lexa obliged, and they slowly made their way to the tower, the commander leaning heavily on Clarke. When they finally got into the elevator, Clarke sighed in relief at the fact that they were almost there. That was, until Lexa clutched at her stomach, and Clarke could tell by the look on her face that the motion of the elevator was making her sick. Clarke pulled Lexa's head against her chest, running her fingers soothingly through brunette hair, and hoping that Lexa wouldn't be sick all over her.

When they reached the correct floor, Clarke was happy to find that the contents of Lexa's stomach had remained inside of her the whole ride. As they staggered down the hall, Clarke could tell that Lexa was fading fast, and she wanted to cry when her girlfriend collapsed halfway to their room. Clarke tried to get her back up, but she was out cold. Clarke was exhausted at this point, and she was getting rather annoyed, so she grabbed onto Lexa's legs and pulled her down the remainder of the hallway and into her room.

When they were at the foot of Lexa's bed, Clarke crouched down and used all her strength to lift Lexa off the floor, and she knew she would've dropped her if the bed wasn't right there. Clarke proceeded to take Lexa's armor and coat off, taking off her boots as well before moving her into a more comfortable position. Clarke took her own jacket and boots off before collapsing into bed beside the commander. To Clarke's dismay, Lexa's glazed-over green eyes opened when she felt the bed dip beside her.

"Clarke, have intercourse with me," Lexa said, and Clarke almost burst out laughing again at the blunt statement.

"Lexa, you're crazy drunk. I'm not having sex with you," Clarke said.

"Please," Lexa begged.

"No," Clarke said, "Now go to sleep."

"You're very pretty, Clarke," Lexa murmured, "Like a goddess."

Clarke smiled as she watched Lexa's eyes slide closed again as she slipped into oblivion. The brunette looked so peaceful when she slept, and that was one of Clarke's favorite ways to see her girlfriend. She leaned over to unweave some of the reachable braids in Lexa's hair so that the other girl could sleep more comfortably. Lexa's eyes fluttered as she worked, but they did not open again.

Clarke pressed a kiss to Lexa's forehead. "Goodnight, ai hodnes."


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter is a longer one, and the next one probably will be as well. As always, I hope you guys enjoy the chapter, and thank you for continuing to read this story!

Clarke woke when she felt movement underneath her head. She was half-tempted to tell Lexa to go back to sleep, but as she couldn't remember if she and Lexa were supposed to be somewhere soon, she turned her head up from its previous position on Lexa's chest, so she could look into the brunette's eyes. However, the moment those green eyes blinked open, Lexa squeezed them shut again, groaning, and the memories from the previous night came rushing back to Clarke.

"You have a hangover," Clarke realized.

"I am not familiar with that word," Lexa said.

"It's what happens after you get drunk," Clarke explained, "Your head hurts like hell, and you feel like you're going to be sick."

"Yes, that about sums it up," Lexa said, rolling them over so she could bury her face in Clarke's chest. "I must have had a lot to drink last night."

"I'm sorry I let you get so drunk," Clarke said, feeling guilty that she hadn't even thought of the hangover that Lexa would get from it. "I'll go get you some water."

"No, stay," Lexa said, tightening her grip on the blonde. "You are warm, and I am tired."

"I'll come right back, Lexa, but please let me get you a drink," Clarke said, "It'll help you recover faster."

Lexa's only response was to loosen her grip on Clarke, and the blonde took that as her cue to get up from underneath her girlfriend. Lexa buried her face in Clarke's pillow as the blonde walked out of the room and headed down to the dining hall. A few minutes later, Clarke returned with a nice cool cup of water.

"Here. Drink this," Clarke said, extending the cup to Lexa as she blinked open her eyes.

The commander slowly sat up and faced away from the windows to keep the blinding light out of her eyes as best she could. Clarke sat down beside her and rubbed her back as she slowly drank from the cup. When Lexa had finished most of the water, she handed the cup back to Clarke, who got up to set it on the table in the center of the room. She made a mental note to talk to Lexa sometime about getting a bedside table. When she rejoined Lexa on the bed, the brunette girl was still sitting up.

"What happened last night?" Lexa asked.

"Do you remember anything at all?" Clarke asked.

"I remember you begging me to drink, saying that it would be so fun, and I finally gave in. I remember consuming drink after drink as you watched, and then it all becomes fuzzy," Lexa said, "Was I as entertaining as you hoped I would be?"

"You were hilarious," Clarke smiled.

"Do I even want to know what I did?"

"Probably not."

"Thanks for taking care of me," Lexa said.

"You don't have to thank me. It's my fault you even needed taking care of in the first place," Clarke pointed out.

"Yes, but I would've never been able to lose myself if you hadn't been there to watch me," Lexa said, "It's nice to be able to let my guard down once in a while."

"You never have to keep your guard up around me," Clarke promised.

Lexa pressed a quick kiss to Clarke's lips before slowly lying back down. Clarke would've loved to keep talking to the brunette, but she was looking extremely pale, and Clarke could tell that the commander did not feel well at all, so Clarke laid back down beside her. She pulled Lexa against her, allowing the brunette to fall comfortably back asleep. Clarke was no longer tired, so she just laid awake, staring up at the ceiling. She played gently with Lexa's hair while the other girl slept, and she studied the beautiful design of Lexa's huge headboard. Really, Lexa's entire bed was huge, and Clarke marveled at how this gigantic bed was reserved for one person. Clarke felt like royalty even getting to share the bed with Lexa, and she wondered how Lexa must feel, being treated like a goddess among her people. Clarke was sure she would find out because she would likely be treated the same way due to the fact that she was Lexa's girlfriend. Clarke wished she had something to draw with because she would love to do a sketch of that headboard while she waited for Lexa to sleep off her hangover, or maybe she could do a sketch of her sleeping girlfriend. However, she knew that she would most likely wake Lexa if she tried to get up, so she simply remained where she was, continuing to play with Lexa's beautiful hair as the hours went by.

Clarke wasn't sure how much time had passed before a knock sounded at the door, but she knew it was a good amount. She didn't want to move and wake Lexa, but when the knock came again, Lexa groggily lifted her head from Clarke's chest, looking towards the door.

"I'll get it," Clarke said, "You go back to sleep."

Lexa hummed in approval as Clarke slipped out of bed, and she could tell that Lexa was only half awake because she seemed to fall right back into oblivion once Clarke was no longer beside her. Clarke made her way over to the doors, annoyed that somebody had disturbed Lexa's peaceful slumber, even if it was only for a few seconds. She opened the door to find a guard she did not recognize standing on the other side.

"Wanheda," the guard said, surprised that it had been she who had opened the door, "Is Heda alright?"

"Heda had a little too much to drink last night. Other than that, she's fine," Clarke assured him.

"Oh, Heda finally got to have some fun, huh?" he said, smiling, and this caused Clarke to smile as well.

"Yes. It took some convincing though."

"I would imagine it would."

"So what can I do for you?" Clarke asked.

"Two of the Skaikru are here asking for you. They say it is urgent," the guard reported.

"Is it Abby and Marcus?" Clarke asked, "The ones who are here because of the Summit?"

"No, these two are much younger. I would assume around your age. They just arrived here this morning," he explained.

"Take me to them," Clarke said, wondering what on earth could possibly be wrong now.

"Sha, Wanheda."

* * *

Clarke followed the guard outside to find none other than Bellamy and Octavia waiting for her. She thought for a moment that they had simply come to join her in Polis. Then again, they wouldn't come without Raven, and Clarke remembered that they had told the guard to tell her that it was urgent. Then, there were the looks on their faces, and Clarke seriously hoped that whatever they were about to tell her wouldn't be too bad.

"What's this about?" Clarke asked, and they turned at the sound of her voice.

"Clarke," Octavia greeted, "I wish I could say it was nice to see you, but under the circumstances, I'm afraid that it is not."

"It's Jaha," Bellamy explained, "He's been giving everyone this chip. He says it's the key to the City of Light and that if you take it, all your pain will go away. It wasn't such a problem at first until everyone started taking them. Now, we've figured out that they control your mind."

"Control your mind? How?" Clarke interrupted.

"There's this crazy artificial intelligence lady," Bellamy continued, "She calls herself A.L.I.E. Once you take this chip, she controls your mind. You just blindly follow her. You forget the ones you love, and you try to convince more people to join you in the City of Light. This woman is the one who set off the bombs that destroyed the earth. I think her aim is to take over the world, destroying everyone who's alive and making the City of Light the only plane of existence."

"At first, we didn't know much about it," Octavia said, "We thought Jaha had just lost his mind, but now the situation's getting out of hand. Almost everyone in Arkadia's been chipped, and they're coming here next."

"Where's Raven?" Clarke asked. "Is she alright?"

"She's fine," Octavia assured her, "She stayed back with Monty and a few guards to try and hack into A.L.I.E's code and find a kill switch to shut this thing down, but we rode ahead to warn you, just in case she can't."

"Thanks, but I don't know what we can do to stop this A.L.I.E. woman. How did you even find out about her in the first place?" Clarke asked.

"Jasper's been chipped," Bellamy said, "and he told us about her when he tried to convince us to join him in the City of Light."

"That's also how we know you forget about the people you loved," Octavia chimed in. "He doesn't even remember Maya."

"Jasper also tried to talk to Raven about something," Bellamy said, "He wanted her to get A.L.I.E. into the Ark system because A.L.I.E. believed that version two of her code was in there. Raven refused to do it of course, but they got to Sinclair, chipped him, and he did it for her. The only problem was that version two _wasn't_ in the Ark. A.L.I.E. was confused because, according to her, it should've been. Now, she's marching her army of zombie Arkadians on Polis because she thinks that version two of her code might be here. If she's so adamant to find this code, it must be the only thing that can destroy her, right?"

"Or the one thing she needs to set her plans into action," Clarke pointed out.

"Either way, we can't let her have it," Octavia said, "If she thinks it could be here, there must be a reason. The grounders might know something. We need to talk to Lexa."

"Where is Lexa anyway?" Bellamy asked.

"Someone may have convinced her to get drunk last night, and she's had a killer hangover all day," Clarke said guiltily.

"Aw, poor Lexa," Bellamy said.

"You got the commander drunk? I'm sorry I missed it," Octavia said, "I'm sure that would've been a sight to see."

"It was funny, but I don't want to make her come all the way down here if she doesn't know anything. Do you have any of these chip things on you that I could show her?" Clarke asked.

"I told you she'd ask that," Octavia said smugly.

"Yes, I brought one because Octavia insisted you'd want to see it," Bellamy said, holding it out for her.

"Thank you, Octavia," Clarke said as she took the chip in her hands. "Wait here. I'll be back soon."

Octavia and Bellamy nodded in agreement as Clarke made her way back into the tower. On the long elevator ride up to the room she shared with Lexa, Clarke took some time to really look at the chip. The only thing that really stood out was the infinity symbol that was on the top of it. Clarke could've sworn she'd seen the symbol before somewhere, but if she had, she couldn't place it. When she got back into her room, she found Lexa still sleeping, but the brunette blinked her green eyes open when she heard the sound of the door opening and shutting.

"Clarke?" she asked.

"Hey, Lex, how are you feeling?" Clarke asked.

"Much better," Lexa said, sitting up. "Where were you?"

"Bellamy and Octavia are here. Apparently, Jaha is giving everyone at Arkadia some chip that controls their minds, and the mind controlling artificial intelligence woman, A.L.I.E., is bringing her army here to look for version two of her code. We think this code may be the only thing able to stop her," Clarke explained.

"What are you talking about?" Lexa asked, looking extremely confused.

Clarke forgot who she was talking to, and she realized that Lexa must think she was crazy. Either that or she must think that she's hallucinating or dreaming. Clarke tried to think of it in a way that Lexa would understand, but she gave up, walking over to sit beside her on the bed.

"In short, this chip controls people's minds if they swallow it. Do you know anything about it?" Clarke asked, handing the chip to Lexa.

"It's the symbol of the commander," Lexa said right away.

"What?" Clarke asked.

"It's the symbol of Heda," Lexa repeated, "I have it on the back of my neck, as did all the commanders before me."

That's when it hit Clarke, and she realized where she had seen the symbol before. Lexa had it tattooed on the back of her neck. Clarke moved to sit behind Lexa, and she brushed brunette curls out of the way to inspect the tattoo. She ran her fingers over it and instantly realized that there was a raised portion of skin right in the middle. A scar.

"Lexa, you have a scar back here. Is there something inside your neck?" Clarke dared to ask.

"The commander's spirit," Lexa replied simply, as if the answer should be obvious.

"What do you mean by that?" Clarke asked.

"I mean that the commander's spirit is inside my neck. That's why I have the sacred symbol there. It is what allows the previous commanders to speak to me in my sleep," Lexa said.

"So the commander's spirit is a physical thing?" Clarke asked and Lexa nodded. "It can't be one of these chips because it's not controlling your mind, but why else would it have the same symbol?"

"I don't know, Clarke," Lexa answered honestly, "I have not really seen it. Titus is the Flamekeeper, so he is the one who you should be asking about these things."

"Then let's go talk to Titus," Clarke said, "Are you okay to come with me?"

"I should be. I just need to braid my hair first," Lexa said.

"No, Lexa. That will take forever. We need to sort this out before A.L.I.E. gets here."

"But I cannot go outside among my people with my hair like this."

"Lexa, this is urgent."

"But, Clarke…fine, but only because I love you."

"Thank you," Clarke said, kissing Lexa on the cheek. "Let's go."

* * *

"Clarke, where's Lex—omg, that's Lexa! I've never seen you without your hair all done up before," Octavia said.

"I know. I wanted to braid it, but Clarke literally just dragged me out of bed," Lexa said.

"It looks pretty the way you have it," Bellamy offered. "Are you feeling better?"

"Much better," Lexa said.

"So this must be pretty important if you dragged Lexa out of bed for it," Octavia said to Clarke.

"Oh, it is. I showed her the chip, and she said it's the symbol of the commander, and look at this. Turn around, Lex," Clarke instructed.

Lexa obliged, and Clarke swept her hair to the side, revealing the broken infinity symbol that was tattooed on her neck. Bellamy and Octavia gasped, and Octavia ran her fingers over the scar.

"She's got a scar," Octavia noticed, "There's something in her neck."

"She says it's the spirit of the commander, but she doesn't know anything more and that we need to talk to Titus about it," Clarke explained.

"Then, let's go. Where is he?" Bellamy asked.

"His chambers are outside of the tower. I'll take you there," Lexa said.

Clarke slipped her hand into Lexa's as they walked down a side alley to where Titus apparently resided. Clarke didn't even want to think about what being involved with the symbol might mean for the brunette. She only knew that she would do whatever it took to make sure that no one harmed her Lexa.

When they got into Titus's chambers, they were met with a surprising sight. Murphy was tied to a chair in the middle of the room, and Titus was standing over him, questioning him. Clarke immediately stormed over to him, fury sparking in her eyes.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Clarke asked angrily.

Titus turned to look at her with a furious expression, and for a split second, Clarke was afraid that he was going to hit her, but after noticing Lexa and the other two behind her, he clearly seemed to think better of it.

"Wanheda, this man was caught stealing from our people," Titus reported, "The only reason he was brought here instead of being killed on the spot was because he had the sacred symbol."

Clarke watched as Titus held up the chip. "That's actually what we're here to talk to you about."

"I told him what it was," Murphy said, "Jaha tried to get me to take it to go to—"

"The City of Light. Yes, we know," Clarke said, "He's taken over Arkadia. Apparently, almost everyone is chipped, and they are headed here now. A.L.I.E. is looking for version two of her code. She thought it was on the Ark, but she could not find it, so now she's coming here."

"Your first commander." Murphy addressed Titus and Lexa. "She came down from our thirteenth station, Polaris. Her escape pod is in the corner. She might have been A.L.I.E.'s creator, and if so, she would've had version two of the code. I'd start looking in here."

"The first commander was from Polaris," Clarke said, and suddenly, it felt as if everything was falling into place. "The second version of A.L.I.E.'s code is in Lexa's neck."

"You think so?" Lexa asked, and Clarke nodded. "Titus, what exactly does the Flame look like? Does it look similar to those chips?"

"Yes," Titus admitted, "but it has to be activated to use it."

"It's an AI," Murphy said, "and A.L.I.E. will do anything to get her hands on it if that's what she's looking for."

"Can we remove it from your neck?" Clarke asked Lexa.

"Of course not," Lexa said, "Without it, I would not be Heda."

"You're still the commander, Lexa, whether you have that chip in you or not, but if you keep it in your neck, and A.L.I.E. finds out where it is, she'll probably kill you. Let me take it out, and that way you'll be safe. If worse comes to worst, and we have to surrender it, we won't have to surrender you," Clarke said.

Lexa nodded hesitantly. "Okay."

"Heda, I can't let you do this," Titus said, "The spirit must remain inside of you until the day you die. It is our way."

"You will not oppose me, Titus, or you will be executed for treason," Lexa said sternly, "We clearly have not understood the real purpose of the Flame, and as long as I carry it, I am in danger. You need to allow Clarke to remove it."

Titus bowed submissively before pulling out a red cloth and handing it to Clarke. "In here is everything you will need to remove the Flame."

"Thank you. Take us to a medical room," Clarke instructed.

* * *

When they arrived in one of the medical chambers in the Polis Tower, Titus turned to head back to his chambers to release Murphy and show him to a guest room in the tower, per Clarke's orders. As they entered the room, Clarke could see in Lexa's eyes that she was a little wary, so she reached down to squeeze the brunette's hand.

"You'll be okay, Lexa," Clarke whispered in her ear. "I promise I won't let anything happen to you."

Clarke unwrapped the cloth that Titus had given her, relieved when she saw a scalpel inside. She pulled it out before turning to her friends.

"Will you guys go find the healer? He usually stays in a tent outside. Tell him I need stitching supplies."

Octavia and Bellamy nodded and ducked out of the room, in search of the supplies that would allow Clarke to stitch her girlfriend back up. She took the lid off of the case that was meant to hold the Flame, ready to put the Flame back inside after saying the deactivation words that Titus had taught her. Clarke instructed Lexa to lie out on her stomach on the table in the center of the room, and Lexa obliged, still looking uneasy.

"I won't start until they come back with the stitching stuff," Clarke told her.

Lexa nodded nervously. They waited in silence for Bellamy and Octavia to return, Clarke rubbing Lexa's back to relieve the tension in her muscles that had built up at the thought of going through surgery. Once Bellamy and Octavia brought Clarke her supplies, they hung around, looking awkward as Clarke got ready to begin. Lexa was lying on the table with her face turned to the side, and Clarke knew it couldn't be the most comfortable position, but it was the only way for the blonde to have good access to her neck. Clarke moved Lexa's hair to the side and ran her hands over the space, making room for her to work.

Octavia spoke up from behind Clarke. "Do you want us to just wait outside or…?"

"I actually could use your help. I need you guys to tie Lexa down for me so I can safely cut this thing out of her head," Clarke said.

"I do not need to be restrained, Clarke," Lexa argued.

"Lexa, this will hurt, and if you move in any way, you will mess up my cut, and it could kill you. Just let me take precautions," Clarke begged.

Lexa nodded at the knowledge, and Clarke sent Bellamy to get some rope. When he came back, he and Octavia got to work tying Lexa to the table while Clarke sterilized her supplies and her hands with a bottle of rubbing alcohol that she found in the cabinet. She moved over to Lexa's side as Octavia was just tying the last knot. Lexa strained against the ropes and found she could not move an inch. Clarke did not miss the fear that flared up in green eyes at the prospect of not being able to move. Clarke knew the commander hated to feel trapped, but there was no other way for her to make sure Lexa stayed still while she worked. Clarke realized that Bellamy had picked up on the same thing she had and was relieved when he tried to calm the commander down.

"Lexa, you're going to be fine. We're not going to hurt you. You know that, right?" he said, and she nodded.

"Well, Clarke is, but we're not," Bellamy amended.

Clarke jabbed him in the ribs. "Don't remind me."

She was not mad though. Bellamy's attempt at joking had clearly relaxed Lexa a little, and Clarke shot him a grateful smile. Bellamy and Octavia then moved away to give Clarke space to work. She glanced back to see Octavia sitting on the counter and Bellamy standing beside her, and Clarke nodded to them before turning to begin the procedure. She grabbed her scalpel and began to cut into Lexa's skin. Lexa whimpered in pain as Clarke drew the scalpel in a line down her neck. Clarke wished she didn't have to do this, but she knew that it would be better than allowing A.L.I.E. to kill her girlfriend. Once the incision was complete, Clarke's eyes were drawn to the black waterfall that was flowing down either side of Lexa's neck and accumulating in twin pools on the table below. She forced herself to look for the AI, and she easily spotted it. Reaching into Lexa's neck, she grabbed it, pulling it out carefully and trying not to hurt Lexa too much. She said the deactivation code, and the tendrils that extended from it shrank back into it and disappeared. Clarke set it on the table before getting to work stitching Lexa back up before she lost too much blood.

"All done," Clarke said once she was finished.

Bellamy and Octavia moved to help Clarke untie Lexa, and once she was free, the brunette's shoulders slumped in relief. Lexa was just about to get up from the table when Clarke stopped her.

"Wait, let me wipe the blood off your neck," Clarke said, and Lexa stopped moving. Clarke grabbed a wet cloth and carefully wiped the black from the back of Lexa's neck.

"Okay, you're all done," Clarke said, wiping the blood off the Flame as well.

"Thank you, Clarke," Lexa said.

Clarke pulled her in for a passionate kiss in response, careful not to grab her by the back of her neck. Clarke was relieved that the surgery had gone well, and she had successfully gotten the chip out of Lexa's head. Clarke got lost in the kiss, only coming back to reality when Octavia awkwardly cleared her throat. Clarke and Lexa immediately pulled back in embarrassment, wearing matching blushes.

"Listen, you guys are cute and everything, and we're glad that you got the AI out without any trouble, but what are we going to do with it now?" Octavia asked.

"Well, I guess we'll just put it in its case, and I'll hide it in our bedroom," Clarke said.

"We're just going to wait for them to come?" Octavia asked.

"There's nothing else we can do," Clarke said, putting the Flame into its case and sliding the case into her jacket.

"For now, let's go have dinner. I'm starving," Clarke announced, "and then I'll have one of the guards show you to a guest room. I'll be taking Lexa to bed after dinner. She lost a fair amount of blood today, and she could use some rest."

"First, a hangover and then a surgery. Lexa, you've had a rough day, haven't you?" Bellamy asked sympathetically.

"Oh, I've had worse," Lexa assured them, and they all laughed as they made their way to the dining hall.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the longest chapter I've ever written at 6,125 words, so I hope you all enjoy it! Our girls are going into the City of Light this chapter, so get ready! Thanks for reading!

Aden burst into Lexa's room where Clarke, Lexa, Octavia, and Bellamy were sitting around the table, discussing what to do with the second AI. Clarke noticed the look on his face, and she glanced at Lexa, knowing whatever he told them next wasn't going to be good.

"What is it, Aden?" Lexa asked.

"They're here," Aden announced, looking out of breath, as if he had run all the way up to the commander's room. "The one you call Jaha has been distributing chips to the people of Polis. He's letting that bad woman Clarke told me about control their minds."

Last night, Aden had come to speak to Lexa, but she had already been asleep, and Clarke took the time to fill him in on what had happened that day. She figured she at least owed him an explanation as to why the commander had been busy all day on their first day of supposed peace.

Lexa's face hardened at the news. "How many?"

"A lot," Aden admitted, "and their numbers are still growing. I tried to stop them, but it's no use. When their friends and family recommend the chip to them, it's hard to get them to see reason."

Clarke smacked her hands against the couch in frustration. "Damn it. It looks like we'll have to figure out a way to defeat A.L.I.E. sooner than we thought."

"How? We're still no closer to finding a way." Octavia gave her a helpless look.

Aden drew their attention back to him. "Well, you need to hurry. They're looking to speak with you, Lexa. The entrance to the tower has been sealed off, and I told the guards at the door to gather all the other guards in the tower and meet us in the throne room soon since it's on the highest floor. I think the bad people are going to try climbing the tower."

Lexa slipped easily into commander mode. "Have the guards grease the windowsills of every room in the top half of the tower and barricade the stairs and elevator shaft. Then, meet us in the throne room."

Aden nodded before hurrying out the door to carry out the commander's orders. The room fell into silence, and Clarke racked her brain, trying to think of anything that could possibly beat this crazy AI woman. She was about to give up when she finally remembered something that Octavia had told her when she and Bellamy had first arrived.

"You said Raven was looking for a kill switch," Clarke said, breaking the silence. "What does that mean?"

"It means that she is reading through A.L.I.E.'s code in order to find a kill switch in the City of Light that will shut the entire thing down," Octavia explained, looking at Clarke confusedly.

Clarke continued without explaining herself. "This kill switch. Will Raven be able to activate it on her own from her computer?"

"She certainly thinks she can," Octavia told her, "Why?"

Clarke took a deep breath before saying where she was going with her interrogation. "Because I think she'll need someone to physically go into the City of Light in order to pull it." Clarke knew her friends would protest, but she said it anyway, knowing that it would most likely be the only way.

"You can't, Clarke," Bellamy said, catching onto what Clarke was implying. "If you take that chip, A.L.I.E. will be able to control your mind. You'd never get close to the kill switch."

Clarke pushed on anyway, prepared to argue in order to make them see her point. "If I'm right, if I take the Flame, then I'll be able to take the chip and go into the City of Light without A.L.I.E. being able to reach me. If we're right about the second AI being the only thing that can stop her, then it makes sense. It must be like a virus or something."

"So you're saying you're going to take the Flame and find the kill switch yourself?" Octavia sounded unsure of what to make of that.

Clarke nodded immediately. "Yes."

Lexa finally spoke up, drawing everyone's attention to her. "You can't. Only nightbloods can take the Flame. If you do not have night blood running in your veins, then the Flame will reject you and kill you in seconds. According to legend, our people have tried it before, and let's just say it was not pleasant."

Clarke paused to think for a moment, trying to figure out how to get around this new obstacle that was suddenly blocking her way. After a few moments of silence, the perfect idea came to her. "What if I did a blood transfusion, like what they were doing at Mount Weather? I could filter night blood into me and filter my red blood out."

Lexa raised an eyebrow. "And where are you hoping to find a nightblood willing to give up their blood?"

"I was hoping I could use yours?" Clarke said, sounding less sure than she had a moment ago.

"Relax, Clarke, I was only teasing." Lexa smiled, and the blonde's shoulders slumped in relief. "You may have my night blood, but I am coming with you."

"Lexa, there's only one Flame," Clarke pointed out.

"Yes, but my mind has already been exposed to the Flame. For five years actually. I don't think A.L.I.E. will be able to affect me now," Lexa said.

"And if you're wrong?" Clarke asked.

"We'll cross that bridge when we get there." Bellamy broke through their argument. "For now, we need to get to the throne room. We can't waste any more time."

Clarke's friends began to get off the couch, Octavia grabbing the Flame from where it rested on the table in front of them, and Clarke got to her feet as well, stopping Bellamy and Octavia in their tracks with her next words. "You guys need to go get my mom. Tell her to bring blood transfusion supplies and meet us in the throne room as fast as she can. She's on the floor below us. Second door on the right if you take the stairs."

Clarke and Lexa headed for the throne room as Octavia and Bellamy raced off to grab Abby. When they got inside, Lexa looked at her throne and frowned before moving to pull Clarke's new throne up beside hers.

Clarke wondered what her girlfriend was hoping to accomplish with this. "What are you doing?"

"We will have to sit when we go into the City of Light. Now we can sit side by side." Lexa looked back at her with a smile on her face. Clarke wondered how on earth she was smiling at a time like this.

The room fell into a tense silence for a second before Clarke decided to ask the question that was on her mind. "Are you afraid?"

Lexa blinked. "Not really. We are basically going to war, Clarke. That is my element."

"I'm a little scared," Clarke admitted.

Lexa moved over to put her hand comfortingly on Clarke's arm. "Don't be. I'll be right by your side through it all. I promise I won't let anything happen to you."

Clarke nodded, sitting in her throne, and Lexa moved to sit beside her. Wordlessly, Lexa took Clarke's hand, and they just sat like that, unmoving, as they waited for Abby to arrive. Clarke tried to focus on the feel of Lexa's hand in hers rather than how nervous she was about what they were going to do. When Abby finally came in with Bellamy and Octavia, Clarke noticed that Aden was with them and that he had brought a few guards.

Aden bowed respectfully to Lexa before reporting, "Your orders are being carried out, Heda. I brought these guards here to protect you."

"Thank you, Aden," Lexa dipped her head to him.

Abby made her way over to Clarke, kneeling in front of her and placing her hand upon her daughter's knee. "What's this I hear about you taking the chip?"

"I have to, Mom. It's the only way." Clarke looked earnestly up at her mom.

"And you want me to exchange your blood with Lexa's?" Abby questioned.

"Yes. It's the only way that I can take the Flame," Clarke explained.

"And you two are planning to destroy this City of Light once and for all?"

"Yes. And we will."

Abby stayed silent for a moment, clearly not liking the idea, before she stood up straight, removing her hand from Clarke's knee. "I hope you're right."

She immediately got started setting up the equipment that she would need to make this go as smoothly as possible. When Abby began sticking needles in their arms, Clarke could tell that Lexa was uncomfortable with this new development, but she did not speak out against it, simply letting it be. Once Abby was done, the procedure began, and Clarke watched as her red blood flowed into Lexa, and Lexa's black blood flowed into her.

"We seriously must be soulmates now that we've had each other's blood running through our veins." Clarke tried to joke to calm her nerves, but her voice cracked halfway through.

Lexa smiled at Clarke before moving her hand back to rest in Clarke's own. She gave Clarke's hand a reassuring squeeze, seeing right through the blonde's brave façade. Clarke was really nervous, but she had to admit she was a lot less scared knowing that Lexa would be going with her.

Clarke could feel Lexa's gaze on her, and she turned her blue eyes up to meet a forest of green. "Are you ready, Clarke?"

Clarke nodded before turning back to her friends. "Bring me the Flame."

Octavia grabbed it from her coat pocket and brought it over to Clarke. "Do you remember the activation words?"

Clarke did not understand why she needed the activation words before Abby made the incision, but she said them anyway. When she did, the tendrils shot out of the small AI, and Octavia held it up to her neck. Clarke was surprised when it tore its own way into her flesh, and she screamed in pain. She could feel concerned green eyes on her, and she gripped hard to Lexa's hand until the pain subsided.

Abby moved to stand in front of her as she fell silent. "Are you alright?"

Clarke blinked, turning her head from side to side and realizing that she couldn't feel the Flame at all anymore. "I feel fine, and I was right. This is the only way to defeat A.L.I.E. I don't know how I know. I just…do. Bring us the chips."

Bellamy grabbed the chips from where they were stored in the pocket of his own coat, handing one to Abby, before moving to give his to Lexa while Abby did the same for Clarke. Clarke accepted the chip, watching out of the corner of her eye as Lexa did the same, and she swallowed it. She closed her eyes, and the world faded to black.

* * *

When Clarke opened her eyes again, she realized that she was standing on a black asphalt surface in front of what appeared to be the entrance to a tunnel. The next thing she realized was the lack of a person standing next to her. She was all alone.

"Lexa?" Clarke called.

At that moment, Lexa materialized next to her, still holding her hand, and opened her eyes as well. The blonde breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of her girlfriend. Clarke noticed that Lexa was wearing her full battle armor with two swords strapped over her back and black warpaint smeared across her face. Clarke looked down over her own clothes and realized that she had on a navy blue jacket, a blue shirt, and jeans. Skaikru clothes. She hadn't worn Skaikru clothes in a long time. She also realized that she had her gun holstered at her hip instead of her usual sword or bow and arrows.

"So this is the City of Light?" Lexa didn't move her gaze from where it was fixed upon the buildings that loomed above them.

"Yes," Clarke answered.

Lexa turned her head back to face Clarke, the corners of her lips turned up in a small smile. "It's kind of amazing."

"This must have been what the world looked like before the bombs," Clarke told her, taking a moment to look around herself.

Lexa's next question brought the blonde back to reality. "So what do we do?"

"I don't know, but we're not helping anyone by just standing around. I guess we'll have to find out where the kill switch is." Clarke began to walk down the street.

Lexa nodded, following her down the road in front of them until they came to sidewalks that were teeming with people. Clarke was shocked to find that there were so many people already here. So many minions that A.L.I.E. had already collected. Clarke and Lexa pushed through the crowds, trying to get their bearings in this strange place, when Clarke's eyes landed on a very familiar person crossing the street.

"Jasper," she called out.

However, Jasper didn't seem to hear her, walking right past her with his ice cream cone and sitting down on a red bench.

"They can't see us," Lexa realized, coming to the same conclusion as Clarke.

The blonde nodded. "That's a good thing. A.L.I.E doesn't know we're here yet."

"Then, we need to hurry. Let's go," Lexa said forcefully.

That's when Clarke saw it. There was a blue infinity symbol on the traffic light instead of a walk signal. She turned to Lexa, but the commander was already walking off.

"Lexa!" Clarke called out.

Lexa turned back, and Clarke pointed to the symbol, but before Lexa could see it, it was gone, replaced by a red hand that indicated that the people should stop crossing the street.

Lexa trained her confused green eyes on Clarke. "What? The hand?"

"No, there was an infinity symbol there just a second ago," Clarke told her, catching up to her girlfriend.

"You mean like that?" Lexa pointed to something on her right.

Clarke followed her finger to where a lady was walking away from them. A lady who had her hair done up in the shape of the sacred symbol.

"It's a sign from Becca Pramheda," Lexa murmured.

Clarke's brow furrowed in confusion. "Who?"

"The first commander. Come on." Lexa grabbed Clarke's hand.

They hurried after the woman who was making her way through the crowd, and Clarke caught onto what Lexa had been implying. These symbols were directing them towards the kill switch. Suddenly, as they were walking past a staircase, the people around them stopped what they were doing, and they all turned collectively to look at Clarke and Lexa. Clarke froze and grabbed Lexa's arm to pull her to a stop beside her. A.L.I.E. knew they were here.

"Should we run?" Clarke looked around, trying to gauge how many people there were.

"We can take this batch. We'll run if they call for reinforcements," Lexa said, unsheathing her swords.

Clarke quickly grabbed her gun, and she and Lexa stood back to back as A.L.I.E.'s minions began to charge. Clarke instantly began shooting, taking down person after person. She could hear Lexa's battle cries behind her, and she knew that her girlfriend was holding her own as well. The more people that came at them though, the closer they got, and it was harder for Clarke to keep track of them all when she could only shoot one person at a time. They were almost gone when Clarke felt her gun being yanked out of her hands as someone snuck up on her, and she heard a gunshot, followed by a burning pain in her left arm. Her shooting arm. She turned her gaze to the man who had shot her and realized that he was about to let another bullet fly. That was, until a sword slashed through the air, easily cutting off the man's hand that was holding the gun. Lexa scooped Clarke's gun off the ground, tossing it back before easily finishing off the rest of the people around them. Once she was sure there were no more coming for them at the moment, the fierce look melted off her face and was replaced by one of worry as she made her way over to Clarke.

Lexa immediately began checking Clarke over for wounds. "Clarke, what happened? Are you alright?"

Clarke saved her the trouble. "It's my left arm. A man snuck up on me and grabbed my gun, and he shot me. I think it went clean through so it's not gonna kill me, but I don't think I'll be able to shoot anymore."

"We have to stop the bleeding."

Lexa unbuckled her long coat and tore off a bit of the black shirt she wore underneath. Clarke tried not to swoon at the gesture as she watched her girlfriend tie the ripped piece of her shirt tightly around Clarke's arm above the bullet wound. Lexa stared into her eyes for a moment to make sure she was alright, and Clarke seriously wanted nothing more than to kiss her right there and forget about the City of Light, but the moment passed when the commander pulled back, closing her coat back up.

"That'll have to do for now." Lexa pulled the last belt buckle into place. "We need to move before more of them come."

"How will we even know where to go?" Clarke asked, "How do we know they're not already waiting for us somewhere?"

"They probably are," Lexa admitted, "I'm sure they're not going to let us just walk right in to wherever the kill switch is without a fight."

Suddenly, the sky overhead started to go black, and Clarke and Lexa looked up in wonder as the daylight turned quickly to night. Clarke clung tightly to the arm of Lexa's coat, suddenly afraid of what this might mean, and Lexa didn't hesitate to squeeze Clarke's good arm in reassurance.

"What's happening?" Clarke tried to keep the fear out of her voice.

"It must be the Flame," Lexa said calmly, "It's changing things."

"Wait a second. My father's watch," Clarke said, noticing for the first time since they got there the item that was on her wrist. She realized that it was set for ten minutes till the infinity symbol. It was counting down. "We have ten minutes to find that kill switch."

Lexa's reply was cut off by a jingling sound. The two young leaders whipped around to see a little girl riding a bike past them, and neither of them missed the infinity symbol that was stitched on the back of her jacket. They took off running after the bike, chasing it down an alleyway until they reached a fence. A dead end.

Clarke rattled the fence. "Should we climb it?"

Lexa contemplated the question for a moment before shaking her head. "No. There's barbed wire at the top. We have plenty of time to find another sign."

They started to head back the way they had come when they were interrupted by a very familiar man, stepping out of the shadows with an army of people behind him.

"I'm afraid I can't let you do that," Jaha said.

"Snap out of it, Jaha. She's controlling you." Clarke tried to get through to him.

Jaha continued on as if she hadn't even spoken. "You can surrender now, Clarke, or you can both die right here. It's your choice."

Clarke turned to look at Lexa for help, and she realized that Lexa wasn't paying any attention and was instead looking at something behind them. She wanted to be angry that Lexa wasn't taking this seriously until she noticed the very serious look on Lexa's face.

"Clarke," Lexa called, not moving her eyes from the object they were trained on.

Clarke followed her gaze to find a metal door in the side of the wall, and she knew that it hadn't been there a moment ago. She watched as a white bird materialized on the door. A raven.

"Raven," Clarke said, "She must've found the kill switch. Somehow, she created a door to lead us right to it."

Lexa nodded. "Let's go."

They raced over to the door and were about to open it when Jaha nodded at his army, and they began to charge. Clarke looked helplessly back at them, knowing that they couldn't allow these insane people to follow them through the door.

"You go through," Lexa said, "I'll hold them off."

"No. I'll stay with you, and we'll take them out together. We still have seven minutes," Clarke said, after checking the watch.

"Clarke, you can't shoot. They'll take you out in seconds," Lexa pointed out. "Only one of us needs to pull that kill switch. Go!"

Clarke pulled Lexa in for a kiss, pouring all of her love and passion for the girl in front of her into it, and she could tell that Lexa felt the same way through the ferocity of her kiss.

"I love you," Clarke said after she pulled back, still holding onto Lexa's arm.

"I love you too," Lexa answered, and Clarke was comforted by the amount of love she found in the brunette's gaze. "Always."

Then, she slipped out of Clarke's grasp and charged at the oncoming army, flying at them in a flurry of swords. Clarke took one last look at her dauntless warrior before she pushed through the door to find herself…back on the Ark. She could see the earth through the window that encompassed the wall.

"You made it, Commander," a voice said behind her.

She spun around to see a woman dressed in a plain purple shirt and jeans with her dark hair pulled back into a ponytail, and she didn't know how, but she knew instantly that this was Becca. It felt weird to hear Becca refer to her as the commander, and she realized in that moment that Lexa had been right before. The Flame was what made a person the commander.

"Becca," she greeted.

"Yes. You have done well, Commander. As the holder of the second AI, your mind is in control, and therefore, you are the only one who can pull the kill switch," Becca explained, gesturing to a simple white lever on the table in front of them.

Clarke rested her right hand on top of the lever. "I just pull this, and the City of Light is destroyed?"

Becca nodded, and Clarke was about to pull it when she heard another voice speak from behind her.

"I advise you not to do that." Clarke spun around to find a woman in a red dress walking over to her. The woman looked exactly like Becca, and Clarke realized that this was the first AI Becca had created. This was A.L.I.E.

Clarke knew she should've just ignored the woman and pulled the lever anyway, but she was still curious as to what A.L.I.E. could possibly have to say that would make her want to stop. "Why not?"

"Because if you do, I will irradiate the entire world again. Then, all of you will die, even those who were born in space. The City of Light will be the only way to live." A.L.I.E. turned her head to the side in a robotic fashion.

"She's lying," Becca said, "There's no way she can irradiate the world again so quickly. She only has five minutes. It's impossible."

Clarke did not know who to believe. She knew that Becca was probably telling the truth, and A.L.I.E. was lying, but what if Becca was the one who was lying? She'd probably do anything to destroy the AI she created that went rogue, and Clarke knew it was a stretch, but she had to consider the possibility that Becca might let them all die to destroy A.L.I.E. Clarke didn't know who she could trust. She had never met Becca before, so she didn't know why she should trust her any more than she should trust her rogue AI. Clarke knew of someone who did know Becca though, and she looked back, grateful to see that Raven hadn't deleted the door.

"I'll be right back," Clarke said, and she was surprised when the two women didn't try to stop her as she walked out the door.

She emerged into the dark alleyway and looked upon a bunch of dead bodies, scattered across the ground. She smiled to herself at the wreckage that Lexa had left behind. That was, until she noticed one of the bodies _was_ Lexa's. She was lying on the ground, face covered in blood, and she wasn't moving.

"No!" Clarke screamed, rushing over to where she lay.

Upon closer inspection, Clarke saw that the blood on her face came from a gash on her forehead, but she also noticed that the commander's throat had been slit, probably with her own sword. Clarke pressed her fingers to Lexa's pulse point, desperately hoping to feel the steady beat of the brunette's heart, but she found exactly what she knew she would. Nothing. Lexa was dead. She screamed in agony, cradling the commander's lifeless body to her chest as she sobbed uncontrollably. Lexa had kept her promise. She had made sure that nothing happened to Clarke, and she had died because of it. Clarke couldn't help but wish that it was she who had died instead.

She couldn't believe that her Lexa could truly be gone. It seemed like only yesterday they were hiding away in their cave, falling slowly in love with each other again. She didn't want to believe that she would never see those warm green eyes full of love ever again. She didn't want to believe she'd never again see that smile Lexa saved only for her or hear the beautiful girl's melodious laugh. Her tears splashed onto the pavement below. She wanted to kiss Lexa in the desperate hopes that it would bring her back to life, like in the silly kid movies she used to watch on the Ark. The only thing that stopped her was the thought that Lexa's lips wouldn't move against hers. She wanted her last kiss with the other girl to be the one they shared before Clarke had gone through that door, when Lexa was alive and well. Besides, she knew all too well that this was reality, and it never worked like the movies had led her to believe. Clarke clung to Lexa, not wanting to let her go, but she noticed there were only two minutes left on the watch, and she didn't care who she could trust anymore. If A.L.I.E. irradiated the world, and they all died, so be it. She just knew she had to destroy this blasted City of Light so that her Lexa didn't die in vain.

Clarke gently laid Lexa's body back down on the pavement in front of her, carefully stepping around it before heading angrily to the door. She burst back into the room and found both women still waiting for her by the table that held the kill switch. She stormed over to it, putting her hand on it, ready to pull.

"Think about this, Clarke. If you stay here, you can stay with Lexa forever," A.L.I.E. said in her mechanical manner.

"Don't you dare say her name!" Clarke shouted brokenly. She blinked back her tears, trying to get her emotions under control, even though she felt like her entire world had just been torn out from underneath her feet. "Besides, she's gone. Even here."

"Oh, Clarke, she's—" Becca started, but Clarke cut her off.

"I don't care. I'll pull the switch."

A.L.I.E. was about to protest again, but Clarke didn't give her the chance, successfully pulling the switch, and her world went dark again.

* * *

Clarke opened her eyes to see her mom standing in front of her. She wanted to be happy at the sight of her mother, but she couldn't even bring herself to smile after what she had lost.

"Clarke, are you alright?" Abby asked worriedly.

Clarke nodded carefully, and her mother sighed in relief, a smile spreading across her face. Clarke wondered how her mother could look so happy when Lexa was gone. Didn't she care about the brunette at all?

"You did it," Abby congratulated her, "The chipped people who got past the barricades and into the throne room are back to normal." Abby looked like she was going to go on, but she broke off when she realized the tears that were starting to form in Clarke's eyes. "Oh, honey, what's wrong?"

"Lexa's dead," Clarke choked out through a sob.

That's when she felt a hand squeeze hers, followed by a voice that she thought she'd never hear again. "I am right here, Clarke. I am fine."

"Lexa?" Clarke asked.

She dared to turn her head to the side, hoping it wasn't all just a trick, but there was Lexa, sitting in the throne beside her, looking alive and well. She nodded to Clarke, and the blonde realized that Lexa's face was clean of cuts, and her throat remained untouched. Clarke looked down at her own arm to see that all traces of a bullet wound were gone.

"How?" Clarke spluttered, "I held you in my arms. You were dead."

"I was fighting Jaha's army, as promised, and I had almost conquered them all, but one of them smacked me in the face, and as I backed away, someone else knocked me in the back of the head, and I woke up here," Lexa scowled.

"It was really funny too," Octavia said, coming over to join them. "She was like, 'Damn it! I think I died.' Like you two were in some kind of virtual reality video game."

Clarke might have laughed if she hadn't been so worried. She ripped the needles out of her arms and climbed into Lexa's lap, ripping out Lexa's needles as well so that they did not continue to take her blood. She immediately burrowed her face in Lexa's neck, letting her tears flow, and the commander gently rubbed her back while she sobbed. "I thought you were dead." Clarke had felt so hopeless in those moments when she believed Lexa was gone, like her soul had been sucked from her body, and she never wanted to feel that way again.

"It is alright, Clarke. I am fine," Lexa murmured soothingly, cradling Clarke's head to her chest with one hand. Clarke did not even try to stop the tears at first. She had been so scared that she would have to live every day from then on without the girl she loved, and she was so glad to find it wasn't true. Lexa was here, and she was alive. Clarke tried to concentrate less on her raging emotions and more on the comforting beat of Lexa's heart, reminding her that her commander was indeed still with her. After a few minutes, Clarke's sobs finally died down, and she pulled back a bit.

"I know you're alright, but you scared me." She smacked Lexa lightly in the chest. "Don't do that again."

Lexa gave her a bewildered look. "It was not my fault, Clarke. I was taking on many people all at once."

"I know," Clarke sighed, dropping her head back to Lexa's chest.

Lexa brushed her fingers under Clarke's chin, causing the blond girl to turn her head up. "Why did you come back out for me?"

"Because A.L.I.E. said she would irradiate the world again if I destroyed the City, and Becca said she was lying. I didn't know who to trust, so I came to ask you," Clarke said, "only to find you lying on the ground with your throat slit open."

Lexa gasped in shock and outrage. "They slit my throat with my own sword? Those branwadas!"

"Lex, not the point," Clarke couldn't help the tiny smile that turned up the corners of her lips at Lexa's reaction.

"Sorry. Becca is trustworthy. If she says A.L.I.E. was lying, then A.L.I.E. was lying. Besides, you do not see us dying from radiation poisoning, do you?" Lexa pointed out, raising her eyebrows.

"I guess not."

"So you did it. The City of Light is really gone. Nice work, ladies." Clarke pulled back a bit in Lexa's lap and turned her head to find Bellamy, who she had not previously noticed, standing beside her.

"It wasn't hard." Clarke dipped her head, brushing off his praise.

Bellamy smiled. "Whatever you say, Princess. Anyway, we should probably get that thing out of your head now, don't you think?"

"Yes, please," Clarke said, having honestly forgotten all about the Flame until that moment.

"I wonder if it will just come out with the deactivation phrase," Bellamy said.

"You can try it."

He said the words, and the thing tore itself out of her neck. She held on tight to Lexa's shoulders as Bellamy pulled it out before relaxing again.

Lexa wasted almost no time in asking her next question. "Can you put it back into me now?"

"You're still going to put that thing back in your head?" Clarke looked at her skeptically.

"I need it. It is the only way for the previous commanders to communicate with me. As the Heda, I must have it," Lexa explained.

"Fine, but after your stitches are healed," Clarke relented, "Then, we can put it in cleanly like we did for me without having to cut your neck open."

"That sounds nice," Lexa agreed.

"Besides, we should probably give your body time to run my red blood out of your system," Clarke added.

"Of course," Lexa agreed.

Clarke turned around in Lexa's lap, with her back pressed to Lexa's front, so that she could talk to Octavia and Bellamy easier. She made no move to get up, so Lexa looped a protective arm around her waist. Clarke put her hand over Lexa's, refusing to let go, lest the other girl disappear. She knew she was being silly, but after a day like today, she just wanted to be sure. The two leaders talked with Bellamy and Octavia, telling them about their adventures in the City of Light, while Abby, with the help of Marcus, who had arrived at some point when Clarke was in the City of Light, inspected the people who had previously been released from it. Clarke enjoyed the comforting sound of Lexa's voice behind her, and she had to stop herself from shuddering at the feel of the commander's warm breath against the back of her ear. After the day's events, she wanted nothing more than to take the commander right there, tear off the brunette's clothes, and make her squirm underneath her. She wanted to prove to herself that Lexa was there, and Lexa was hers, but she knew she would have to wait until later for those activities.

"Should I dare to hope we can finally have peace?" Lexa asked, pinching Clarke's stomach playfully.

"Might not want to jinx it this time," Clarke joked, squeezing Lexa's strong hands.

"Don't worry, guys." Bellamy leaned against the arm of Lexa's throne. "We'll have peace soon."

"You mean there's no other unforeseen problems?" Clarke asked in mock surprise.

"Maybe one or two," Octavia said, and Clarke was relieved to hear that she was only joking.

At that moment, Aden burst into the throne room, his face lighting up when he saw that Clarke and Lexa were awake. He ran over to the throne, climbing on beside Clarke and hugging her and her girlfriend. Clarke and Lexa moved to return his hug, huge smiles adorning the faces of all three of them.

"Heda, Wanheda, you're okay," he said in relief.

"Yep. We did it," Clarke told him.

"The City of Light is no more," Lexa said.

Clarke felt Lexa lean her cheek against her blond hair, and she looked past Aden's smiling face to see the smiling faces of Octavia and Bellamy above her. She realized in that moment that she was glad that she had been sent to the ground all those months ago, even if she hadn't originally wanted to go. She had to admit that it was hard being the selected leader of her people when she never asked for it, but even though she had to make a lot of difficult choices, and she had lost countless people, it was all worth it to be here now. If she had stayed in space, she wouldn't have the amazing girlfriend and the wonderful friends that surrounded her now. Clarke realized that she had found something on this planet that she wouldn't trade for anything. A family.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Thursday, everyone! I hope you all had a good one! Enjoy!

Three days later, and the people of Polis had gone without anything interrupting the peace. The day after the City of Light was destroyed, Abby and Marcus went back to Arkadia to get back to their people, and they said that they would let Raven know that it was safe for her to arrive in Polis. Clarke, Lexa, Octavia, and Bellamy were now wandering the streets of Polis, waiting for Raven to arrive. Lexa couldn't help but smile at the fact that she was spending time with the love of her life and her newfound friends.

When Raven finally arrived, the three Skaikru members went nuts, rushing over to say hello to her. Lexa remained at a respectable distance, giving the other girl a smile and a polite nod. Raven made her way over to hug Lexa anyway. After an initial time to talk and catch up, and the promise, to Octavia's delight, that Lincoln would be arriving the next day now that Clarke had convinced Lexa to lift his kill order, the four of them began to show Raven through Polis. Before long, to the surprise of no one, she began to teach some of Lexa's people to build a small bomb. A Molotov cocktail, she had called it.

Lexa, Clarke, and their friends were watching from a respectable distance, but once the people of Polis started to try constructing some for themselves, Raven made her way over to join them, one of the small bombs in hand. "Hey guys, you want to throw one?"

Clarke rolled her eyes, shaking her head, and Raven held it out to the commander. "Lexa?"

Lexa's eyes widened, and she quickly stepped behind Clarke for protection. She knew she was being childish, but she didn't want to be anywhere near that thing, lest it should explode. Clarke seemed to know exactly what Lexa was thinking because she smirked, stepping out of the way. "Lexa, it's not going to explode unless you light it."

Lexa reached out hesitantly, and Raven placed it in her hand. "When I light it, throw it as far as you can towards the woods, okay?"

Lexa nodded, and Raven went to light a stick in a fire pit near one of the butcher stands before bringing it back to light Lexa's cocktail. Lexa instantly quelled the fear she was feeling, knowing that Clarke wouldn't be allowing her to do this if it were not safe. Once Raven lit the bomb, Lexa threw it into the woods, where it exploded in a fiery blast. Some of her people instantly ran over with buckets of water, having been prepared for this kind of thing the minute Raven began building the bombs. The people who had been working to build their own bombs cheered for Lexa, and she couldn't help but smile. She had to admit that this new form of weapon was pretty cool.

"See? That wasn't so scary after all." Clarke spoke up from behind her.

Lexa turned to face her with a grin. "Not at all. I am just not used to Skaikru technology so I was a bit wary."

"No need to be," Clarke said, giving her a quick kiss. "Maybe someday I'll teach you how to shoot a gun."

Lexa was hesitant at first because she had been taught to fear guns at all costs, but then she nodded, trusting Clarke. "Okay, Clarke. I will be looking forward to it. Now, if you'll excuse me though, I have to make sure the new weapons came in properly."

"I'll come with you." Clarke grabbed on to Lexa's hand.

Clarke and Lexa walked away from their friends, pushing through the crowded streets to find the area that housed most of the weapons stalls. Lexa was glad when she saw the young woman from the trading post and her father distributing the last of the weapons to the vendors. Lexa nodded to them both, and they bowed respectfully, but before she could even open her mouth to speak, Clarke released her hand, stepping a little closer to inspect the workers. "Niylah?!"

"No way. Wanheda!" Niylah exclaimed, making her way over to Clarke.

"Please, call me Clarke." The blonde extended her hand for Niylah to grasp in the style of the grounders.

"You're finally going to tell me your name, huh?" Niylah teased.

"I'm sure you already knew it by now," Clarke pointed out, to which Niylah just shrugged and nodded.

"You two know each other?" Lexa broke through their friendly chat.

"Yes, I stayed with Niylah at the trading post for a while when I was in hiding. You know, before Roan found me. She's my friend," Clarke explained.

Niylah laughed aloud, and Lexa was seriously confused as to what the other woman found funny. "Do you sleep with all your friends then?"

Lexa stiffened at the mention of this. Clarke had slept with this woman?

"Niylah!" Clarke scolded.

"What's wrong?" Realization dawned on Niylah's face at that moment. "You're seeing someone, aren't you?"

"Yes." Clarke reached down and grabbed Lexa's hand before giving Niylah a pointed look. "Lexa."

"You and the commander?" Niylah asked, looking shocked, and Clarke nodded. "I'm very sorry, Heda. I didn't mean to be disrespectful. It was nothing really."

"Don't worry about it, Niylah. You're fine," Clarke said.

Niylah kept her inquisitive gaze on Lexa. "Heda?"

Lexa wanted nothing more than to kill this woman on the spot, but Clarke jabbed her in the side, so she said gruffly, "Of course. It is fine."

"Listen, Niylah, why don't you stay here today? We can catch up," Clarke offered.

Niylah smiled. "Sure, I'd love that."

Lexa seethed. Clarke had slept with this woman, and now she was inviting her to stay in Lexa's own home? She wanted nothing more than for Niylah to leave. Lexa knew Clarke loved her, but she couldn't help the feeling that she was being replaced. After all, Clarke had slept with this woman after she met Lexa, and she had never mentioned it to the brunette once.

"You cannot stay here. You have more deliveries to do in the other villages," Lexa said, unable to hide the anger from her voice.

"We only have one other village to bring weapons to today, but of course, Heda. If you wish for me to finish the job immediately, then I will not stay." Niylah bowed respectfully.

Clarke caught her arm before she could leave. "No. Lexa's just being jealous, and for no reason, I might add. You are perfectly welcome to stay."

"I am the commander, Clarke," Lexa growled, "I have the authority here, and I say she leaves."

"Lexa, I'm not allowing you to turn her away just because I slept with her one time. I'm with you now, and you're being ridiculous," Clarke said sternly.

"I am not. I simply wish for her to continue her job," Lexa said, keeping her eyes guarded. "She has weapons to deliver to another village."

Octavia hurried over to where they were arguing, easily introducing herself and intercepting Niylah's attention, pulling her over to watch Raven teach the people of Polis how to build bombs. The two bickering girls shot Octavia grateful looks, glad that they would now be able to talk more easily without the object of their conflict standing right in front of them.

Once Octavia and Niylah were both out of hearing range, Clarke turned to her girlfriend with gentle eyes. "I'm sorry I never told you about what happened with Niylah."

"I just do not understand why you would keep this information from me." Lexa's own eyes softened as well.

"Because it didn't mean anything." Clarke brought her hand up to Lexa's cheek. "I love _you_ , Lexa."

"And I love you too, Clarke," Lexa said sincerely, but she knew that her doubt was still visible in her eyes. "Are you sure you no longer have feelings for this woman?"

"Positive, Lexa. I'm all yours." Lexa could not mistake the absolute love that was shining in Clarke's blue eyes, so she nodded.

"Then, she may stay, and I will give the two of you some time to catch up," Lexa said reluctantly. "Perhaps I will spend some time with Raven."

"That sounds like a good idea. I'm sure she'll love the company. And if you can, please make sure she doesn't burn down the whole village," Clarke said.

Lexa's eyes sparkled with amusement. "I will try my very best."

Clarke kissed Lexa on the cheek before pulling away to go join Niylah. Lexa watched, still feeling uneasy, as they exchanged a few words with each other before heading into thecrowd. Once they had disappeared from Lexa's view, the brunette walked back over to where Raven was still trying to teach her people how to make bombs. Some of them burnt out without an explosion, but others were successful, bursting into flames on impact with the ground. Lexa couldn't help but notice the comparison between the flames that were bursting up from the bombs and the fire of jealousy that she still felt burning in her heart. She tried to quell this fire as she sat on a rock watching Raven work, but she had to admit that she couldn't help it. She didn't want to share Clarke with anyone, and she hated the fact that Clarke had been intimate with Niylah like she was with Lexa. It made her want to keep this girl away from the blonde for the rest of her life, but she had to admit even she could see how crazy that would be. She knew that Clarke was not her property, so she allowed the blonde to do as she pleased. That just didn't mean that Lexa had to like it.

The commander had to admit that Raven worked well with her people, and they all seemed to like her, listening intently as she corrected them on what they did wrong. She also had to admit that this form of weapon would be very useful for them in taking out any enemy that may yet arise. Once her people started to better get the hang of it, Raven came over and plopped down beside her. "What's up, Lexa? You look broody."

Lexa turned to face her. "It's Niylah. I do not like her."

"Yeah because she slept with Clarke, and you're jealous," Raven said.

"I just do not like the way that Clarke is treating me as if I am in the wrong." Lexa sighed.

"You kind of are, Lexa. She said it didn't mean anything, so you need to believe her. You have no right to be jealous right now when there is clearly nothing going on between the two of them. Clarke loves you, not Niylah, and you're her girlfriend. You should trust her."

"I know. I am just finding it quite hard to picture Clarke with someone else. But maybe it would be better for Clarke to have her. Why wouldn't Clarke want her?" Lexa couldn't bring herself to meet Raven's eyes. "I mean, I am the commander. I will always have to lead my people. With Niylah, Clarke can be free."

Raven rolled her eyes. "Lexa, you're being ridiculous. You and Clarke are practically married. There's no way she would ever want anyone else."

"Then why did she sleep with her?" Lexa countered.

"Because she was hurt. You left her at the mountain, and she was extremely upset with you for it. You of all people should know that after what she did to you when she saw you again." Raven smirked a little at the thought. Lexa brought her hand up to ghost along her jawline, feeling a phantom ache there at the memory that Raven had inspired. Lexa still couldn't help the way her lips turned up slightly, even though Raven's comment had been at her expense. God, it had hurt and been an awful ordeal when Clarke broke Lexa's jaw, but the way that Clarke felt so greatly at that moment, even if it was hatred for Lexa, was what made the brunette fall in love with her in the first place. Clarke was a leader, same as her, but she found a way to feel so greatly and still do what was best for her people. Lexa often found that she had to push her feelings away to do the same.

"I understand," Lexa said, "So should I just leave her alone, or should I try to apologize for my earlier actions?"

Raven opened her mouth to respond, but Lexa began talking again before she even got a word out. "I will apologize. What should I say?" she asked turning to Raven. Lexa hoped that Raven would give her something to say that would impress Clarke and make up for her earlier behavior.

"Tell her she's the most beautiful woman you've ever seen." Lexa watched as Raven got an almost mischievous glint in her eyes. "And then tell her you want to fuck her."

Lexa cocked her head to the side upon hearing the Skaikru term. "What does that mean?"

Raven laughed, and Lexa was even more confused as to what was so funny. "It means that you want to kiss her, and I'm going to guess you do."

"Yes, I would very much like to kiss her, but I know when you are lying." Lexa raised an eyebrow. "I assume this word is something I most definitely should not use aroundClarke and that you only wish for me to say it to get a laugh out of the situation."

Raven just shrugged. "Eh, it was worth a try."

"Perhaps, I will say it to her some other time when she is not already mad at me and see how she reacts." Lexa winked.

"If she is not mad at you, I'm sure you'll like the result of that." Raven smirked at her, and Lexa wondered what this word could possibly mean that would be bad for her to say now but seemingly good if Clarke was not mad. She shook the feeling off, knowing Raven would not tell her if she asked.

"Anyways, thank you, Raven," Lexa said brightly, standing up from the rock.

"Anytime, Lexa."

* * *

When Lexa finally found Clarke and Niylah, they were standing near a jewelry stand, and they had seemingly just bought a necklace, which they were admiring, that now hung around Niylah's neck. Lexa only hoped that Clarke actually let Niylah pay for it herself. She didn't like the idea of Clarke giving this woman gifts. However, Lexa knew she would make it nowhere with Clarke if she continued thinking like that, so she took a deep breath before she walked over to stand beside Clarke, pushing her jealousy down as best she could.

"Hello, Clarke," Lexa said as she walked over to where the blonde was standing.

Clarke nodded in greeting, and Niylah dipped her head politely. Lexa could tell Clarke was at least a little mad about the way she had acted earlier because she did not kiss Lexa upon her arrival or even grab her hand. She tried not to think about the other possibility for this, but somehow it pushed its way into her head. Maybe Clarke simply did not greet her in the usual way because she preferred Niylah's company to Lexa's. Still, she swallowed this feeling and pushed on with what she needed to say. "I'm sorry, Clarke, for the way I acted earlier, and Niylah, I apologize to you as well. You are welcome to stay here for dinner tonight."

"Thank you, Heda," Niylah said.

Clarke then did reach down and take her hand. "Thank you, Lexa. It was very big of you to come over here and say that."

"I think you're very beautiful, and I love you," Lexa said.

Lexa was glad when this brought a genuine smile to Clarke's lips. She was even happier when Clarke leaned up to kiss her cheek. "I love you too."

When she pulled away, Lexa nodded to both of them and left them alone. She didn't get very far before she was pulled into a conversation with one of her people. He wanted her to look at some small bracelet, and she did, kind of admiring the way the color was so similar to that of Clarke's eyes. To anyone else, she would appear to be paying attention, but Lexa's focus was still on her girlfriend and Niylah. Her stomach churned when Niylah reached out to touch Clarke's arm, and she wanted nothing more than to go over there and yell at the other girl to leave, but she did not wish for Clarke to be mad at her, so she let them be. She finished her conversation with the jeweler, and then she forced herself to walk away. She knew that if Clarke wanted to spend time with Niylah, it would be best if Lexa didn't stick around to watch.

* * *

Lexa managed to avoid Clarke and Niylah for the rest of the afternoon, instead choosing to hold a training session with the nightbloods. When the session was over, Lexa knew it was time for dinner, and there was no avoiding the blonde and her "friend" any longer. While the rest of the nightbloods ran off so that they themselves could eat, Aden made his way over to Lexa's side, knowing that something was wrong. She sighed, wondering why it was that she could never get anything past Aden.

"Heda, is everything alright?" he asked.

Lexa would have lied to anyone else, but to Aden, she let herself be honest, shaking her head. "No. The weapons were delivered today, and it appears that the young woman from the trading post knows Clarke too well for my liking. They were intimate in the past, and now Clarke claims they are just friends and has invited her for dinner, but I still do not like her being there."

"Would you like me to serve your dinner tonight? I can accidentally spill some food or water on her." Mischief danced in the young boy's eyes. "Or both."

Lexa's lips turned up in a smile, and she wished so much that she could say yes. "I would love that very much, Aden, but Clarke will see right through that act. She will know it was I who authorized it."

"I could get one of the younger nightbloods to do it," Aden suggested, "Jacen is only five summers old. It would be perfectly believable if he did it. Kids spill stuff all the time."

Lexa reluctantly shook her head. "Then, Clarke would be angry at me for putting someone so young on duty when we have a guest. I will have the normal servers bring our dinner tonight. I do not wish for Clarke to be mad at me."

"Don't worry, Lexa. Anyone with eyes can see that Clarke loves you," Aden reassured her, "and if this woman becomes a problem, I will not hesitate to beat her up for you."

Lexa smiled at him. "Thank you, Aden. Now, go join the others for dinner. I have a very awkward meal to sit through."

Aden nodded to her before running off in the direction that the other kids had gone. Lexa sighed, running her hand through her long brunette hair, wincing when her finger snagged in one of her braids. She took a deep breath before making her way towards the tower where the others would most likely be waiting for her.

* * *

Everyone was already seated, as expected, when Lexa walked into the dining hall: Raven, Octavia, Bellamy, Clarke, and Niylah. The trading post worker was seated on one side of Clarke, and there was an empty place waiting for Lexa on the girl's other side. Lexa's blood was already boiling before she even sat down. Why should Niylah get to sit beside the commander's girlfriend? That should be Lexa and only Lexa. Niylah should be sitting on the other side of the table, but she let it slide.

"Hello, Commander," Niylah greeted in a polite manner.

Lexa wondered if the politeness was all an act. She gave the woman a stern nod, and she didn't miss the glare that Clarke shot her, warning her to be nice. Lexa sat down stiffly, wishing she could be anywhere but there at the moment. Raven and Aden may have been able to convince her that Clarke probably wouldn't leave her, but she still couldn't be sure about what Niylah would do. She had no idea of the other girl's intentions. For all she knew, Niylah could be here to win Clarke's affections, and Lexa still couldn't be one hundred percent certain that she wouldn't succeed. Being with Niylah would be so much easier, definitely safer, and most likely better than being with Lexa. She held too much responsibility as the commander.

When Niylah next addressed her, she had to try her best not to groan. "I heard you were out training your natblidas. How was it? Are they shaping up to be the warriors you expect them to be?"

"It went well," Lexa said gruffly, "They will all be great warriors someday."

Niylah was put off by Lexa's tone, and she brought her eyes down to her lap, seemingly learning that she should not be addressing the commander so casually, and she was right. Lexa did not wish for this woman to be on familiar terms with her. However, the brunette did not miss the disapproving glare that Clarke shot her way or the way that Clarke scooted a small distance away from her. She wanted to apologize, but she couldn't help it. She wanted this trading post girl gone. She knew she needed to allow Clarke to do what she wanted, and if that meant spending time with Niylah, then so be it, but Lexa could not help her jealousy, and she wished that Clarke did not expect her to spend time with Niylah too.

After Lexa's gruff remark, Niylah avoided her like the plague, not daring to address her again, and Clarke refused to look at her as well. Clarke's friends shot her sympathetic looks, but when the food arrived, Lexa refused to look at anything other than what was on her plate. The other five table inhabitants conversed easily, almost as if Lexa weren't there, and she was left to brood in peace. She sat quietly for several minutes, ignoring everyone around her until the people at the table brought up a topic that drew Lexa's attention.

"That bracelet is beautiful." Raven pointed to the object on Clarke's wrist. "Where'd you get it?"

Lexa noticed that it was exactly the same bracelet that she had looked at earlier. The one that matched Clarke's eyes. She was suddenly curious as to why the blonde had gotten it.

Clarke glanced down at her wrist before saying, "Oh, Niylah bought it for me."

Lexa's lips turned down in a frown. Now Niylah was buying the blonde gifts? Clarke was Lexa's, and she wanted to make sure this woman knew it.

"I did," Niylah confirmed, "It's absolutely beautiful, and it goes well with her eyes, don't you guys think? This man—"

"Clarke." Lexa interrupted before Niylah could continue, and Clarke turned to face her, a small glint of annoyance sparking in her eyes. Suddenly, Lexa was kissing her. She knew she shouldn't because it was rude, but she couldn't help herself. Having this woman around who had clearly been attracted to Clarke at some point in the past set Lexa on edge, and having the girl buying _her_ girlfriend a gift pushed her right over it. She didn't like the fact that this other girl had seen all of Clarke, had been intimate with Clarke, but it was even more unsettling that Niylah had been intimate with Clarke before Lexa had. Niylah had Clarke first, and now Lexa couldn't help the feeling that she was trying to take her back. Lexa wasn't surprised when she felt Clarke pushing her back a moment later, without even bothering to return the kiss.

"What the hell is wrong with you today?!" Clarke snarled.

"She bought you a gift, Clarke. That is what your girlfriend does. She is clearly trying to win you back," Lexa argued, and she hated how crazy she sounded.

"No, she's not. If you had let her finish, you would've heard that _she_ didn't go up and pick it out for me and give it to me the way you are thinking. A man came over and offered it to me, said he made it specifically for me, but I did not want to accept it for free. Niylah argued that it was too beautiful not to accept, so she bought it for me. She's not trying to win me back, and you are acting like a child. Grow up, Lexa."

Lexa cringed at the disappointment she saw in the blonde's eyes, wishing that she could erase everything that she had done in the past few minutes. It made sense now. The man had asked Lexa about the bracelet because he had made it special for Clarke, and the commander would know better than anyone else if she would like it. He might have even mentioned it to her that he was giving it to Clarke, but she had been too focused on the two women that were talking behind him to notice. She hung her head in shame, and she knew she had messed up.

"Come on, Lexa. Let's go take a walk," Bellamy said.

She was grateful for the excuse to get out of the room, even if she knew he was just going to yell at her anyway. She easily accepted his offer, following him out of the room and down the corridor to go stand on the balcony at the end of the hall that looked out over the streets of Polis. The dining hall was only on the fifth floor so they were able to easily see what was going on in the marketplace. She and Bellamy stood in silence for a few moments, but it became unbearable, and she only wished for Bellamy to say whatever it was he needed to say.

"So what is it you brought me out here for?" Lexa kept up a formal tone.

Bellamy was not fooled. He already knew who Lexa was inside so he was not intimidated by her commanding exterior anymore. "You acted like an idiot, you know that?"

Lexa sighed, hanging her head. "I am aware."

"Good. You probably think I'm about to yell at you or something, but I'm not." Lexa's green eyes rose up to meet Bellamy's brown ones in surprise, and he smiled. "We all act like idiots sometimes. We just have to realize it and try our best to make it right again."

"And how do I do that?" Lexa asked him.

"Offer to sleep on the couch," Bellamy suggested, "I've learned that when a girl is mad at you, she will often make you sleep on the couch. Maybe if you offer to do so before she tells you to, she will become less mad."

Lexa never thought in all her years as commander that she would ever give up her bed to some girl and offer to sleep on the couch, but she would do it for Clarke. Especially because she would be extremely hurt if Clarke actually _told_ her to sleep on the couch, so she figured it would be better to offer first. "Okay. I will try that."

"I know that Clarke's mad at you now, but I promise she'll come around. Probably sooner than you think. She loves you."

Lexa looked out over her people. "I shouldn't have acted like that. I just love Clarke more than anything else in the world, and I didn't want to take the chance that she might leave me. I don't know what I'd do without her, you know?"

"I understand, Lexa. I've been in your shoes before." Bellamy laughed aloud when Lexa looked down at her boots, wondering why it was that the boy standing next to her would have worn them.

"It's a Skaikru expression," Bellamy explained, smiling, "I keep forgetting you're not familiar with our terms. It means that I've been in a similar situation. Anyway, I had a girlfriend on the Ark, and one time, at a dance, we ran into her ex-boyfriend from three years prior. She wanted to catch up with him, and I remember feeling the same jealousy you probably felt today."

Lexa turned her curious green gaze on Bellamy again. "So what happened? Did you act like a fool as well?"

Bellamy grimaced. "Worse. I punched him in the face."

"Oh." Lexa's eyes widened in surprise. At least she did not go that far.

"Yep, and she broke up with me two weeks later. You're lucky you didn't do something like that," Bellamy said.

"I am sorry," Lexa offered.

"Ancient history."

Lexa swallowed thickly, trying to hold in the tears that she felt at the thought that she had angered her girlfriend. "How long do you think Clarke will be upset with me?"

"I say not very long. Sure she'll be mad you acted so crazy, but she loves you more than I've ever seen her love anyone. Being mad at you will be just as much of a punishment for her as it is for you," Bellamy assured Lexa.

She surprised herself when she leaned lightly against his shoulder, drawing comfort from his touch. He looped his arm around her waist, pulling her closer, and she smiled, grateful that he was here and that he was allowing her to have this moment. It was nice to have someone who understood and who cared about her because she hadn't had someone she could confide in, well, ever. She had always had older people who mentored her and who she looked up to, and she had her nightbloods, but she was glad to have someone her age who she could just be friends with and who seemed to actually care about her. She had been wary at first of Clarke's friends, but now she found that she was actually glad that they were around. It was nice to have people other than Clarke who treated her as Lexa instead of the commander. She was just a girl after all, even younger than Bellamy, and she was glad he saw her as such. She was also extremely grateful that he was sticking up for her in this moment when no one else would. Bellamy seemed to sense her need for comfort because he didn't move away, allowing them to stand in that very spot as the sky turned black, and the stars blinked into existence.

* * *

When Lexa and Bellamy had left the room, Clarke turned back to face her friends, glad that her infuriating girlfriend was gone for the time being. She turned back to Niylah with an apologetic look. "I'm so sorry for the way she was acting. She had no excuse to be so rude."

Niylah's eyes twinkled in amusement. "Maybe if I told her that I was seeing someone else back in my village, then your commander would not have gotten so jealous."

Even though she was angry at the brunette right now, Clarke couldn't help the way her stomach fluttered when she heard Niylah refer to Lexa as her commander. "I'm glad you didn't tell her. She had no right to treat you badly just because we slept together a while ago. She deserves the jealousy for a while. I half want to sleep with you right now just to show her I'm not her property."

"Lexa doesn't think you're her property," Raven spoke up. "She's just afraid she'll lose you. She thinks that it'd be better for you to be with Niylah anyway since she's the commander and all. I think she feels guilty for taking you from a normal life, even though she clearly doesn't want to give you up."

"Like she said, I was born to lead. I never wanted a normal life, and she needs to stop making my decisions for me," Clarke snapped.

Raven sighed in exasperation. "She's not making your decisions for you. She just doesn't have a lot of self-confidence. I think she's a little scared to love. She's afraid you'll leave her and break her heart."

Clarke's head was spinning. She didn't know whether she should feel angry or sympathetic towards her girlfriend right now. "I'll talk to her about this later."

Raven stopped trying to defend Lexa, and Clarke was glad. She didn't want to talk about her girlfriend anymore after the insane way she had been acting all day.

"I should probably go," Niylah said.

"No," Clarke argued, "You don't have to leave because Lexa's acting like a jerk."

Niylah raised her eyebrows. "It is unwise to speak of the commander in that way."

Octavia laughed out loud. "Clarke could say anything to Lexa, and Lexa would do absolutely nothing. She'd never hurt Clarke."

Niylah smiled in amusement. "I see you have the commander wrapped around your finger. But that is not why I am leaving. It is getting late, and my father and I have to bring weapons to one of the nearby villages before dark."

Clarke nodded. "It was nice seeing you here, Niylah. I wish that Lexa would have been more pleasant."

"It is fine. I still had a great time catching up with you." Niylah held out her hand, and Clarke gripped it in the style of the grounders. "I am sure I will see you again."

Clarke simply nodded in agreement, and Niylah pulled her arm away, heading for the door. When she reached it, she turned back, shooting Clarke a smile. "Goodbye, future Hedatu."

Clarke rolled her eyes at the other girl, and then Niylah was gone, leaving Clarke sitting alone at the table with Raven and Octavia. They sat in silence for a moment before Octavia finally spoke up. "Wanna come back and hang in my room for a while?"

Clarke was immediately grateful for the offer. "Yes. I need some time to cool down before I face Lexa again."

"Understandable," Octavia said, "You can stay as long as you like."

* * *

Lexa was already in bed later that night, reading a book when she finally heard the door to her room open. When she had first arrived, Clarke had not been there, and she had decided not to fall asleep just in case Clarke did want her to sleep on the couch. The instant Clarke entered, she tossed the book to the ground, standing up off the bed and making her way over to stand in front of her girlfriend. "I'm so sorry for earlier, Clarke. I don't know what came over me. I was just afraid you would leave me for Niylah, but I know that what I did was wrong, and I should not have acted in that manner."

"Lexa, the only reason I slept with Niylah at the trading post was because I missed you. She was there, and I slept with her thinking that it would get you out of my mind or maybe that it would remind me of the way it felt to kiss you. When I woke up, I immediately regretted it, and that's why I left. Only to be captured by Roan," Clarke said, "The point being that I never really even had feelings for Niylah at all, and you need to trust me."

"I know, Clarke, and I am sorry," Lexa said, looking down in shame. "Would you like for me to sleep on the couch?"

Clarke's lips turned up in a smile when she said this, and she allowed Lexa to wait in silence for a few seconds before she finally answered. "No."

Lexa's brow furrowed in confusion. "But I acted like a fool."

"You're right. You did, and I'm glad you realize what a jerk you were." Clarke's eyes softened after she said this. "But I love you, and you're my fool. I will never replace you with anyone else, and I will never, ever leave you."

"I love you too," Lexa said, "May I kiss you?"

"No," Clarke said, and Lexa immediately felt hurt and disappointed, but she tried her best to push both feelings away. "I'm still mad at you, Lexa. You acted crazy today, and I'm not ready to kiss you yet, but I forgive you. Maybe I will allow you to kiss me tomorrow."

Lexa nodded, glad at least that Clarke forgave her. Clarke changed into her bedclothes and then wandered over to the bed, where Lexa joined her shortly. They lied down on opposite sides, and for the first time ever, Lexa wished that her bed were not so huge. It felt like she and Clarke were miles apart, and she wanted nothing more than to scoot over and wrap her arms around the blonde. However, she refrained because she was afraid that if she did, Clarke would rethink her decision to allow Lexa to sleep in the bed with her, so she was content to simply lie next to the blonde, even if it felt like she was very far away.

Lexa quickly found that she could not sleep without the blond girl. She was so used to the two of them sleeping curled up together that she no longer knew how to fall asleep on her own anymore. Clarke, on the other hand, seemed to have no problem falling asleep, and Lexa could hear that her breathing had already evened out. Lexa thought it was so much worse not being able to cuddle with the blonde when she was lying right next to her than it was when the other girl was away. It was like Clarke's comforting warmth was taunting her, and she had to restrain herself from succumbing to her urge to wrap her arms around Clarke anyway. Lexa couldn't stand the thought that Clarke was lying right there, and she couldn't touch her, but there was an invisible line between them tonight, and Lexa was determined not to cross it. She rolled onto her side, facing away from Clarke so that she was not taunted by the other girl any longer. After a few minutes of lying with her eyes closed, trying to fall asleep to no avail, Lexa felt an arm wrap around her waist, and she could feel the front of the girl whom she had previously thought to be asleep press gently against her back. Lexa sighed in relief as Clarke's hand came to rest upon her stomach, rubbing soothing circles there.

"I'm still upset with you, Lexa," Clarke whispered in her ear, "but we'll be okay."

Lexa didn't know how much she needed to hear those words until now, and she instantly relaxed against Clarke. After being awake for at least an hour, now that she was wrapped in Clarke's comforting arms, she finally, finally drifted off to sleep.


	22. Chapter 22

The next morning, Clarke woke to the light that was streaming into the room. She looked down to find that Lexa had rolled over in her sleep and was now curled against Clarke's chest. The blonde looked down at her girlfriend's innocent peaceful face, and a wave of guilt washed over her for the way she had treated the brunette the day before. Yes, Lexa was wrong to act the way that she did, but Raven was right about the reasons she did it. Clarke got a feeling that Raven wasn't just guessing with the things that she said. She responded too quickly. She obviously heard those things directly from Lexa. Clarke had been blinded by her anger yesterday because Lexa had been acting so rude, and it was honestly embarrassing her, but now she could see that she should've paid more attention to Lexa's obvious insecurities. She felt bad that she hadn't even let Lexa kiss her last night, so she leaned over and peppered kisses across Lexa's face. She watched as her girlfriend's eyes fluttered open, looking dazed for a moment until they focused on Clarke. Lexa smiled brightly at the sight of her lover. "Good morning, ai hodnes."

"Morning, Lex," Clarke said before kissing her nose.

"I am glad to see you are no longer angry," Lexa commented.

"What you did was stupid, but I didn't act any better," Clarke said, and when Lexa gave her a confused look, she added, "Raven told me that you were afraid I would leave you, that you felt guilty that you were taking me from a normal life, and that you thought I'd be better off with Niylah since you're the commander."

Lexa looked up shyly. "She did?"

"Yes."

Clarke watched as Lexa blushed, looking away. "I'm sorry. I was just being stupid."

"No, Lexa." Clarke cupped Lexa's cheek, bringing her face back up to meet blue eyes. "And I'm sorry I made you feel that way. I had no right to do that."

Lexa nodded, and Clarke wanted nothing more than to just kiss her right then and there, but she knew there was more that she needed to say. "Lex, I just want you to know that I could never replace you. Not with anyone. I love you, and I don't want a normal mundane life if it means that I can't have you by my side. I don't care if you have to make a decision that I don't like. I don't care if you are so busy that I can't see you for weeks. Nothing will ever make me want to give you up for someone else."

"Even if you meet the most beautiful, perfect person?" Lexa asked.

"I already have, and I'm looking at her. I will never feel the same way about someone else as I feel about you. You're my soulmate, Lexa. My once in a lifetime," Clarke said sincerely.

A tear slid from Lexa's eye. "I love you so much right now. May I kiss you?"

Clarke shook her head at Lexa for even asking. "Please."

Clarke practically pulled Lexa on top of her, and they both groaned at the feel of the other pressed against them. Then, Clarke's fingers were tangling in Lexa's brunette hair, and she grabbed Lexa's lips with hers, kissing her hungrily. As she slid a hand under Lexa's shirt, she silently vowed to make Lexa come extra hard this morning to make up for yesterday.

* * *

Lexa relished the feeling of Clarke's hand in hers as they walked side by side in the fading sunlight. It was a week after they had returned from the City of Light, and still nothing had disrupted their peace. Lexa was simply glad for the fact that she finally had the Flame back in her neck now that Clarke had decided she was ready. It had felt weird having her contact with the other commanders severed, even if it was only for a brief period of time. Clarke and Lexa had recently arrived back at their cave, where they would be spending the night. Since everything was so peaceful back in Polis, Lexa decided that she could slip away for a night to come back here with Clarke. It would be nice to get some time to themselves. That, and it would be good practice for Aden to take over while she was away. Now, they were walking through the forest, collecting all different kinds of berries. Clarke insisted that they had to eat berries because it was kind of a tradition now, so Lexa agreed. To her chagrin, they had come across the blueberry bush that still had a lock of Lexa's hair wrapped around one of the branches, and Clarke could not stop laughing at the memory. Lexa grumbled at her not to speak of it, wishing that the memory would burn in the fiery pits of hell, but this only caused the blonde to laugh harder, and it was difficult for the corners of Lexa's lips to stay turned down when she heard that sound.

When they had finally gotten all of the berries they could find, which included blackberries, blueberries, strawberries, and Lexa's favorite, raspberries, they headed back to the cave and had a berry feast. Lexa had gotten quite used to berries in the time they were here, and she was surprised to find that she actually missed them. She would have to remember to eat them more in Polis. After dinner, Lexa could see Clarke eyeing up the chalk she had left near the cave wall, and Lexa smiled at her.

"I can see you looking at the chalk," Lexa informed her, raising her eyebrows. "You wish to draw. So go ahead. I am perfectly happy to watch."

Clarke shot her a guilty look. "You sure you won't mind?"

"Of course not. I like watching you draw," Lexa said.

The truth was that she liked watching Clarke do anything, but she did not say this out loud, not wanting the blonde to know just how whipped she actually was. Clarke nodded, wandering over to grab the chalk. She was about to put it to the cave wall to begin a drawing when she lowered it again, turning to face Lexa. "Pose for me. I'll draw you."

Lexa sat up straight, putting on her stoic commander face for Clarke to draw. Clarke simply shook her head and turned to begin drawing while Lexa tried her best to remain absolutely still. Clarke took a while to finish her creation, but Lexa truly did not mind waiting. She watched the blonde work, thinking it cute the way that she put so much focus into the art she was making in front of her. When she finally finished, she stepped out of the way so that Lexa could have a good view of it, and the brunette was shocked to find that she was smiling in the drawing. She realized in that moment that her stoic face had melted off the minute Clarke had started drawing and that there was no way to help the small smile from playing out on her lips as she sat watching her girlfriend. She couldn't say she didn't like it though. She looked happy and carefree, the way she felt around Clarke, like Lexa instead of Heda. She realized the drawing was absolutely perfect because that was exactly who she wanted Clarke to see. Lexa.

"It's beautiful, Clarke," Lexa moved her eyes from the drawing to meet Clarke's.

"Of course it is. It's a drawing of you," Clarke said easily.

Lexa blushed, but she couldn't help admiring Clarke's talent. There was something so delicate about art that made Lexa wish that she could create some as well. She loved the rush of battle and the harsh life of a warrior, but she wished she could also do something like this because, while most of her soul was hardened, there was still one fragile part that wished to express itself in the way Clarke did, one fragile part that only the blonde ever got to fully see.

Clarke must have noticed the wistfulness in Lexa's eyes because she gave her girlfriend a questioning glance. "It is nothing, Clarke," Lexa answered her silent question. "I was only wishing that I could draw like you can."

Clarke beckoned to Lexa with her hand that was still holding the chalk. "Come here."

Lexa pushed herself up from the floor, walking over to where Clarke was standing. The blonde pressed the chalk into Lexa's hand, and Lexa was about to give her a confused look, when Clarke stepped up behind her, holding the hand that held the chalk in her own. "You can. I'll help you."

Lexa turned awe-filled and excited eyes on her. "Really?"

Clarke laughed, squeezing the brunette from behind in a one-armed hug. "Of course. What do you want to draw?"

"You," Lexa answered simply, trying to keep a blush from playing out on her cheeks.

Clarke cleared her throat. She clearly hadn't been expecting that answer, although she should have, especially since she had just drawn Lexa.

"Okay," she said, "we'll draw me."

Clarke began to gently guide Lexa's hand against the cave wall, and Lexa soon found herself really enjoying the art, and not just because Clarke was pressed up against her either. She loved the way she was creating something so beautiful, even if she needed the blonde's help to do it. The drawing took a while, but Lexa was never bored throughout the whole ordeal, instead fascinated by the way Clarke's strokes were so gentle and accurate. When they finally finished, Lexa found herself staring back at a perfect image of Clarke's face, and she couldn't help but feel a little proud that she had at least kind of created that.

"Wow, Clarke. It's beautiful," Lexa whispered, "Thank you."

"No problem. It's what I love to do," Clarke said.

The smile had not left Lexa's face since she first began drawing. "I will make sure you have art supplies when we get back to Polis so you can draw or paint whenever you want. I'm sorry I didn't think of it sooner."

"That would be lovely." Clarke smiled as well. "And it's fine that you didn't think of it earlier. I wouldn't have had time to draw anyway with all the crazy things that were going on."

"I'm glad that is all behind us now," Lexa stated.

"Me too. Now, we can finally have peace."

Lexa was done talking in that moment, missing the feel of the blonde against her already, and she crashed her lips into the other girl's. Clarke immediately reciprocated, turning the kiss heated as she pushed Lexa against an area of the wall that was not yet drawn on. Lexa groaned when she felt Clarke's thigh push in between her legs, and she had to try her best not to grind down on it already. After a few more seconds of heatedly making out, Clarke was beginning to remove Lexa's armor. She didn't even fumble around with any of it, having become a pro at this already. Even though they had been busy most of the time, Lexa had to say that the one thing they always had time for was this. Once Lexa's coat hit the ground, Clarke allowed their tongues to clash together for another moment before pulling back. Lexa immediately whined at the lack of contact. Clarke simply laughed. "Easy there, Commander. We'll have time for that. Just not yet."

Lexa was about to ask why when she saw Clarke bend down to pick up her coat. She held her arms out for it, thinking Clarke was giving it to her, but the blonde just shook her head, sliding it onto herself instead. Lexa watched as Clarke buckled it up and stood up straight, trying her best to wear a stoic expression like Lexa.

"I am the commander of the thirteen clans," she declared.

Lexa raised an eyebrow in amusement. "Oh, really?"

"Yes, and you would do well to obey me," Clarke decreed, not breaking out of her commander act.

"Of course, Commander. Anything you ask." Lexa played along.

"In that case, come braid my hair like yours." A bit of Clarke slipped through when she said that.

Lexa had to try hard not to laugh as she dipped her head to Clarke before moving to stand behind her. Lexa carefully wove blond hair into the braids that she herself was so used to wearing every day, and she had to admit it looked good on Clarke. After Lexa had finished Clarke's hair, the younger girl ran her hands over her it and smiled in satisfaction. "Now, I am seriously the commander."

Lexa shook her head, removing her small gold forehead decal and sticking it to her girlfriend's forehead instead before repeating the blond girl's previous words. " _Now_ , you are the commander."

"Yes, and you would do well to show me some respect, Sky Girl," Clarke said, slipping back into commander mode.

Lexa raised an eyebrow skeptically. "Sky Girl?"

"Yes, it's your turn to be the Sky Girl. I get to be the commander now." Clarke gestured for Lexa to come stand in front of her. Lexa obeyed, and she wasn't surprised when she felt Clarke's fingers in her hair, unweaving her braids until her brunette locks were loose and flowing. Lexa then watched as Clarke moved to the back of the cave, seemingly searching for something. She held it up when she found. Her old navy blue jacket. She walked back over to Lexa, holding the jacket out to her. "Here. Put this on."

Lexa could not keep her smile away as she accepted the jacket from Clarke, easily pulling it on. Clarke stopped and stared when Lexa pulled her hair around to the front, saying nothing. Lexa raised an eyebrow at her. "Something wrong, Commander?"

"Nothing. It's just that you look so beautiful like that. Younger, I guess. Carefree. Like…I don't know, like Lexa. No more Heda. Just Lexa. I like it."

"If you like it so much, then I will continue to look like just Lexa until we have to go back home." Lexa smiled warmly.

"Great. You should dress like this more often," Clarke told her sincerely.

Lexa just shrugged. "Perhaps. I just do not wish for my people to think I've gone soft."

"Because we couldn't have that, could we?" Clarke asked with a teasing glint in her eye.

Lexa mirrored Clarke's teasing tone. "You should know that, Commander."

"Oh, right. You should not be talking to me, Sky Girl. I am the commander," Clarke said in a faux-authoritative voice.

Lexa simply shrugged, the teasing glint never leaving her eyes. "Okay."

She leaned forward and pressed her lips to Clarke's. The blonde fell into the kiss for a few long moments before remembering who she was supposed to be and pushing Lexa away.

"And just what do you think you're doing? A Sky Girl cannot initiate the kiss with the Heda," Clarke panted, a little out of breath from the kiss.

Lexa decided she would tease the blonde even further, raising both eyebrows in mock surprise. "Oh, I'm sorry. I thought I was supposed to be you."

"Of course I initiate now. I'm your girlfriend," Clarke said dryly, "We are not dating in this role play."

"Something tells me that even if we weren't already dating, you would not hesitate to initiate a kiss with me," Lexa pointed out.

"Stop embarrassing me. I am the commander." Clarke leaned in close to whisper in Lexa's ear. "But you're right. I would never hesitate to kiss you first."

Lexa couldn't help the shudder that ran through her body at those words. "My apologies, Commander. What can I do for you?"

"You can be quiet and let _me_ kiss _you_." Clarke roughly pushed Lexa into the wall behind her, and Lexa whimpered when she saw how dark the girl's blue eyes had become. Clarke pressed her body against Lexa's, pinning her against the wall and crashing their lips together, and they immediately opened their mouths to each other. Their tongues battled for dominance for a moment before Lexa remembered that she was supposed to be submissive, and she let Clarke take control of the kiss. She gripped Clarke's waist tightly, trying not to move her hands anywhere that she may not have permission to touch, but Clarke was all over her, moving down to kiss her neck while one hand squeezed her breast through her shirt and the other was tangled in her hair. Lexa couldn't control her moans, and to be honest, she didn't want to. She had the excuse of "playing her role" anyway. Before she knew it, Clarke was lifting her shirt over her head and moving down to nip at her collarbone. Lexa couldn't help but bring a hand up to grab a fistful of blond hair. She was delighted by the feel of Clarke's braids in her hand, and she suddenly wondered if Clarke was this fascinated when Lexa's hair was done up in this style. She dropped her other hand to the belt buckles around Clarke's waist, just stopping herself before she began to undo them.

Lexa brought Clarke's chin up to look at her. "May I take your coat, Commander? You must be feeling rather hot in it."

Clarke thought about this for a moment before replying, "No. I am rather fine as it is. It is you who is looking hot in those pants." Clarke shot her a wink, and Lexa caught onto the Skaikru double meaning of the statement. "Perhaps I can take them off for you."

Clarke unbuttoned Lexa's pants, but the brunette stilled her hands before she could go any further. "You are not a servant, Heda. You should not have to do this for me."

"Fine. Do it yourself then," Clarke said, stepping back a bit. Lexa kept her eyes on Clarke as she slipped out of her pants.

"Better?" she asked when she was standing in only her underwear and bra.

"It would be _better_ if you took off all your clothes," Clarke said, "I should very much like to look at you."

Lexa nodded, unclasping her bra and discarding it before letting her underwear drop. She stepped out of them so that she could stand completely bare in front of Clarke. She moved right up against the blonde, whispering in her ear this time. "Better?"

Clarke licked her lips, and Lexa knew that her mouth had gone dry at the sight, so she smirked. "Now what will you have me do?"

"Lie down so I can get on top of you." Clarke winked at the rhyme she had just created, and Lexa rolled her eyes.

Clarke gasped in shock. "Did you just roll your eyes at your commander?"

"Of course not, Heda." Lexa quickly laid down on the furs they used to sleep on.

Clarke huffed, but she could not resist any longer. She climbed on top of Lexa, kissing her roughly, and Lexa tangled her hands in Clarke's hair, pulling her ever closer. She began to whimper into the kisses though when she felt the buckles on her coat digging into her stomach. Clarke seemed to think she was whimpering in pleasure because she did not let up on the kiss, nor did Lexa pull back because she couldn't bring herself to stop the kiss either. When Clarke moved down a bit so she could have better access to the brunette's neck, Lexa cried out as the buckles tore at her flesh. Clarke pulled back immediately, her commander act gone, as she looked at Lexa in concern. "Oh my god, Lexa, did I hurt you?"

Lexa shook her head, but Clarke saw right through her lie. "Where? What happened?"

"The coat was digging into my stomach," Lexa admitted quietly.

Clarke instantly pulled back to look at Lexa's stomach, and the brunette chanced a look herself, noticing that it now had a few scratches running down it. Clarke winced at the sight. "I'm so sorry, Lexa. I didn't mean to hurt you."

Lexa easily slipped back into character. "It is fine, Heda. If you just remove your coat, we can continue."

Clarke nodded, slipping out of Lexa's long coat before climbing back on top of the brunette. She began to nip and suck at one of Lexa's breasts, and Lexa's fingers fell back into her hair. Clarke grabbed her hands, moving them up above her head and holding Lexa's wrists down with one hand while she continued her work on Lexa's breast. Lexa whined at the feeling of having her hands pinned above her head and when Clarke switched breasts, she explained herself. "No one touches the Heda. You keep your hands off, Sky Girl."

Lexa couldn't help the shudder that ran through her, and she arched her back, pushing her nipple further into Clarke's mouth. Then, Clarke began a trail of kisses down her stomach, and she kissed up and down each scratch mark that she had accidentally made there, letting Lexa know how sorry she was. This action just served to make the wetness that had already pooled between Lexa's legs grow, and she whined with impatience. Clarke seemed to get the message, and she moved down to kiss Lexa's thighs, but Lexa whined again when that's all she did.

"I see you have no patience, Sky Girl," Clarke said with a teasing glint in her eyes. "Tell me what it is you want."

"I simply wish for you to move along with your actions," Lexa stated.

Clarke's eyes were dancing with amusement. "Is that any way to address the commander?"

Lexa smiled. "Will you please stop teasing me, Heda?"

Clarke paused to think on this for a moment before reaching a decision. "Maybe. If you manage to convince me."

Lexa's smile dropped. "Are you asking me to beg?"

Clarke's smile grew as she nodded, and Lexa wanted to scream. She shook her head in answer, and she was surprised when Clarke simply shrugged, bringing her tongue to lay flat against Lexa's sex before entering her. Lexa had trouble keeping her hands above her head where Clarke had left them as Clarke's tongue thrust in and out of her, but she knew she couldn't move them, or Clarke would stop, and she didn't want that. She thrust her hips up to meet Clarke, and the blonde let her. Lexa couldn't keep her moans back as she felt herself getting close. Clarke must have sensed it too because she pulled her tongue out of Lexa a second later, and the brunette whined louder than she had ever whined before. A few seconds later, she was blushing in embarrassment as Clarke smirked down at her.

"I was not done, Clarke," Lexa panted.

"I know. You didn't beg, so you don't get to finish," Clarke said simply, as if she were stating an obvious rule to a silly child's game.

Lexa tried to harden her features, but she didn't think it worked very well what with how worked up she had become. "I am Heda. I do not beg."

"You will for me." Clarke didn't even try to argue that she was supposed to be the commander right now. Lexa glared at Clarke and shook her head. She would do many things for the blonde, but she would not beg. However, she could not remain in the state she was in so she slowly brought her hand down, hoping Clarke would not notice so that she could relieve herself. Lexa's hand was so close to where she wanted it to be when Clarke latched onto it, locking it in a death grip and bringing it back above her head. "Nope. Only I get to touch you."

"Touch me then," Lexa growled.

Clarke shook her head. "Not until I hear you begging."

Lexa growled again in frustration, but it quickly turned to a moan when Clarke brought a finger up to run up and down her slit. Lexa couldn't take the pressure against her sensitive skin. She needed Clarke inside of her, and she could feel her resolve shattering.

"Beg for me, Lexa," Clarke whispered.

Lexa weakly shook her head, and Clarke began to rub her, creating just enough friction to drive Lexa mad, but not enough to get her off. Lexa couldn't take it anymore, and she hated herself for finally giving in. "Please, Clarke, please. I need you to please touch me, Clarke. You're driving me crazy. Will you please, please touch me?"

A tear fell from her eye, but Clarke quickly wiped it away. "That's more like it."

Then, Clarke's fingers were plunging into her, three at a time, and as Clarke brought her tongue down to circle Lexa's clit, Lexa could feel herself finally come undone. She screamed Clarke's name, fingers fisting in blond hair. Clarke helped her ride out her orgasm before pulling out of her and moving up to lay beside her.

"I'm sorry," Clarke apologized, "I really love it when you beg though."

Lexa scowled, but she couldn't hold it for long. She would never admit it, but the orgasm she had just gotten had been worth the begging. She searched for something she could say in response to Clarke, and she remembered a previous conversation she had with Raven. She promised Raven she would say a word to Clarke that she didn't know the meaning of. Raven said it meant kiss, so Lexa decided to use it as if it did. "I want to fuck you now, Clarke."

"Oh, do you?" Clarke raised an eyebrow at her. "You don't even know what you just said, do you?"

Lexa shook her head. "But Raven said I would like the result."

"Fuck means have intercourse, so I'm sure you really do want to fuck me right now." Clarke paused to consider what she had just said. "Or at least, I hope you do."

Lexa answered by flipping Clarke onto her back and rolling on top of her. She immediately began to kiss the blonde. After a few moments of heatedly making out, Lexa moved down to nip at Clarke's neck, and Clarke began to try pulling her own shirt over her head. Lexa grabbed her hands, stopping her. "No. You do not get to feel my skin against yours."

Clarke whined in disbelief. "Why?"

"This is what happens when you make me beg. You are lucky I am still willing to fuck you," Lexa said sternly, and Clarke nodded, seemingly willing to take what she could get. Lexa also noticed that Clarke seemed to get even more worked up when she said fuck. Lexa unbuttoned and unzipped Clarke's pants before dipping her fingers inside to rub Clarke through her underwear, feeling a sizeable wet spot against her fingers. She looked up at the blonde in amusement. "Making me beg gets you worked up, does it?"

Clarke nodded. "That's why I did it."

Lexa continued to rub Clarke, and the blonde bucked her hips in frustration. "Please stop teasing me, Lexa."

Lexa shrugged. "If you insist."

The brunette dipped her hand into the blonde's underwear and thrust two fingers into her girlfriend, bringing her mouth up to meet Clarke's as she pumped in and out of the blonde for a few moments before coming to a decision and stilling her hands. "You know what? I want you begging."

Clarke nodded, giving in easily, as she did not mind begging her girlfriend for what she wanted. "Please, Lexa. I need you to fuck me please. And please, please stop teasing me."

Lexa nodded and began moving her fingers again before adding a third. Clarke raked her fingers down Lexa's back, and Lexa knew she was going to have marks there after this, but she didn't mind. She had gotten used to this kind of thing by now because this was something that Clarke often did in bed. When Clarke finally came undone underneath her with a loud moan, her fingers dug further into Lexa's back until her body stilled, and she dropped her hands back to her side. Lexa removed her fingers, sucking them clean before rolling off of the blonde to lay beside her.

"Can I please take my clothes off now?" Clarke begged.

"Yes, you may take off your clothes now, Clarke." Lexa smiled.

Clarke made quick work of removing all her clothes before lying back down right on top of Lexa. Both of the girls sighed at the feel of skin against skin. However, rather than go for another round, Clarke simply laid her head against Lexa's chest, and the brunette could tell her girlfriend was tired by the way she was already falling asleep. Lexa pulled the blankets up over them, and she kissed the top of Clarke's head. She was tired as well, and she knew it was probably due to the fact that they had walked to the cave rather than riding horses. Lexa didn't mind sleeping though. She was content to just hold Clarke in this place that had become so familiar to both of them.

* * *

Lexa woke to a wall of blond hair covering her face. She gently pushed it aside as she looked down at Clarke, who was still sleeping peacefully on top of her. She began rubbing gentle circles on her girlfriend's back, and Clarke sighed in her sleep. After a few minutes, Lexa slipped carefully out from under Clarke, and luckily, the other girl didn't wake up. Lexa quickly got dressed and then glanced once more at her girlfriend before slipping out of the cave. She listened to the sounds of bird calls as she walked in the faint gray light of dawn. She realized that she forgot to grab the bow and arrows, so her knife would have to do. She pulled it from where it was sheathed on her leg and crept quietly through the trees, her eyes open for some kind of small game for the two of them to have for breakfast. Her eyes brightened when they landed on a rabbit. Careful not to make a sound, Lexa pulled back her arm and threw her knife, which landed easily in the rabbit's side. Lexa hurried over to retrieve her knife and end the creature's life.

When she got back to the cave, Clarke was already up, sitting in front of a fire that she had made, clearly having guessed where Lexa had gone despite the fact that the bow and arrows were still there. When Clarke caught sight of Lexa, she jumped up to meet her, kissing her girlfriend's lips, and then the two of them sat down to prepare the rabbit.

Once both of them had eaten their fill, Lexa suggested they go down to bathe in the river, and Clarke easily obliged, gathering the soap and towels that she had brought for the occasion. Lexa did not have the intention of simply bathing, but she thought it best not to alert Clarke of her plans until later. When they had finally finished bathing each other, Lexa turned to Clarke. "Come out farther with me, my love, and I will teach you how to swim."

Clarke looked hesitant. "I'd love to learn, but what if I drown?"

Lexa skeptically raised an eyebrow. "Do you think I would let you drown?" She paused for a moment, pretending to think. "Well, maybe I would."

"Lexa!" Clarke elbowed her in the ribs.

Lexa leaned over to kiss her cheek. "I am only kidding. I can carry you out, and you can hold onto a rock or something while I demonstrate."

Clarke simply nodding, wrapping her arms around Lexa's neck and her legs around Lexa's waist. The brunette could feel how tense her girlfriend's body was, and she rubbed her back for a moment to try to relieve some of the stress. Then, Lexa began to swim out into the river, with Clarke clinging tightly to her. When she finally got out to a deeper area, she found that she could only stand on her tiptoes, and she began to let go of Clarke. "Since you are clearly afraid to do this, how about I teach you to float first?"

Clarke nodded, and Lexa brought her up to lay atop the surface. "Keep your arms and legs spread wide, and do not tense your muscles, or you will sink."

Lexa began to move her hands out from underneath Clarke, but the moment she did, Clarke began to sink, and Lexa knew the blond girl had not listened to her advice about not tensing up. "Relax, Clarke. I won't let you sink," Lexa promised, gently pushing Clarke back up to the surface.

It took a few tries, but Clarke finally remained on the surface, and Lexa gave her a kiss as a reward. When she pulled back, Clarke was grinning. "If I would've known this would be my reward, I would've gotten it right a lot sooner."

"You still have a chance to get swimming right." Lexa smiled, and Clarke swallowed thickly.

Clarke clung to Lexa again, and Lexa wrapped a protective arm around the blonde's waist before thrusting out with her powerful legs and pulling them out into the deep water, easily swimming to a rock that was in the middle of the river so that Clarke could hold onto it. Once Clarke was securely grabbing the rock, Lexa began to demonstrate to Clarke exactly how to swim. When Lexa wanted Clarke to try it for herself, the blonde refused to let go of the rock, and Lexa rolled her eyes. "The only way to learn this, Clarke, is to try it for yourself."

When Clarke shook her head, Lexa wrapped strong arms around Clarke's waist, prying her off of the rock and throwing her into the water. The brunette rolled her eyes when the blonde seemingly forgot Lexa's lesson and just thrashed around in panic. Lexa was not surprised to watch the other girl going under seconds later. The brunette was quick to pull her back out, but the blonde still coughed dramatically.

"Clarke, calm down. You need to remember what I said, and do it like I showed you." When this did not seem to quell the blonde's fear, Lexa sighed. "I will keep one hand on your stomach to hold you up until you get the hang of it."

This is what Lexa had seen people do with many of the children in Polis, and it always seemed to work for them, so that is what she decided to do with her girlfriend. She kept her hand under Clarke, holding the blonde up until she finally began to get the hang of it, pulling herself through the water. When Lexa finally let her go, she didn't think Clarke even noticed until the blonde turned back to head her way with a huge smile on her face. Lexa held out her arms, and Clarke swam right into them, pausing to rest for a second as Lexa treaded for them.

"I knew you could do it." Lexa kissed Clarke's cheek. "I am very proud of you, Clarke."

"This will be really helpful. I can't wait to show Raven, Octavia, and Bellamy," Clarke said, "but now since you taught me something, I get to teach you something."

"And what might that be?" Lexa asked.

"I want to teach you how to shoot a gun," Clarke said, "and I know you prefer to fight with swords, but you know, just in case."

Lexa gave a sharp nod, knowing that she couldn't back out of this now that she had basically forced Clarke to learn how to swim.

"Great," Clarke said, "My gun's back up in the cave so I'll go grab it when I take the towels back."

When they reached the river's edge, Clarke and Lexa each wrapped a towel around themselves, drying off as best as they could before getting dressed. Clarke grabbed both the towels, and Lexa watched as she walked up the pathway before disappearing into the cave. When Clarke came back down with the weapon, she also had her jacket in hand, which she held out to Lexa. "Here. You promised you'd wear this, Lexa."

"I did, didn't I?" Lexa said, pulling on the jacket. "Where is your coat?"

" _Your_ coat is in the cave, folded nicely. Neither of us is the commander today. We are just ordinary Clarke and Lexa," the blond girl said.

"That sounds nice," Lexa said before leaning in closer to whisper in Clarke's ear. "To be honest, I kind of like wearing your jacket. It smells like you."

Clarke turned to give her a kiss on the cheek before holding out the gun to her as well. Lexa warily took it, keeping it pointed away from herself.

"Aim for that tree." Clarke pointed to the tree that was in front of them.

Lexa held the gun out in front of her, and she noticed Clarke suppressing a laugh. She didn't know what she was doing wrong, but she knew she didn't mind because Clarke immediately came up behind her and helped her to hold it correctly.

"I'll aim it for you the first time, and that way, all you'll have to do is shoot. Then, you can try yourself," Clarke instructed.

Lexa nodded, and Clarke moved the gun up to aim right where she wanted the bullet to go. Then, she squeezed Lexa's hip, letting her know she was ready. Lexa squeezed the trigger, and the gun made a banging sound that Lexa did not expect to be so loud. She fell backwards in shock, crashing to the ground and taking Clarke with her.

"Easy, Lexa. It's alright." Clarke stroked Lexa's hair, and the brunette blushed a deep scarlet color.

"Oops," Lexa said.

"You're fine." Clarke chuckled. "Now you'll be ready for next time. Try it yourself."

Lexa stood up, noticing that the bullet that Clarke had aimed for her had landed right in the center of the tree. Lexa suddenly had the urge to do this herself, and so she aimed as best as she could and squeezed the trigger. Her face fell when her bullet didn't even come close the tree.

"It's okay. No one gets it on the first try," Clarke assured her, "It might take a while. Just try again."

Lexa nodded before bringing the gun back up to aim. It took her six tries before she even hit the tree, and she felt like she was a kid trying to throw her sword correctly again because when she finally hit it, she was so excited that she had to stop to give Clarke a kiss. Clarke smiled and called her cute, and then Lexa went back to shooting. She only stopped when she had gotten her bullet within an inch of Clarke's, and it took her fourteen tries, but she would not be discouraged. She had done it, and that was all that mattered. When they finally set off for Polis again, Lexa's coat tucked under her arm, she felt like they had accomplished a lot on their small vacation, and she wasn't just talking about the sex.

* * *

When they reached the gates, Lexa pulled her coat back over her shoulders, and Clarke braided her brunette hair as quickly as she could before they allowed themselves to be spotted by the guards. The guards began to open the gates for them when Clarke called out, "Wait!"

Lexa turned to look at her questioningly. Clarke slid Lexa's golden forehead decal out of her pocket and stuck it to Lexa's forehead. "There. I wouldn't want you forgetting that."

"Thank you, Clarke," Lexa said, smiling brightly.

When they got back, all of the people welcomed them warmly, and Lexa was glad to find that there had seemingly been no trouble while she was away, as there was nothing to report. They walked around the marketplace searching for their friends, and they found Lincoln and Octavia practicing their archery skills while Raven and Bellamy were sitting on a rock to watch them. Raven was the first to notice them. "Hey. You're back."

"Yes, we are," Clarke said, and Lexa nodded.

"How was your time away?" Raven asked.

"Very nice," Lexa replied.

She was cut off by Octavia before she could say more. "Lexa! Clarke! You're back. Lincoln and I were just practicing our archery skills. Show us how it's done?" She held the bow out to Lexa who readily accepted it, easily shooting arrows into the centers of all three targets while the others watched on in amazement.

"How on earth do you do that?" Octavia asked.

"Even I have to admit, I am not that good," Lincoln added.

Lexa turned back to them with a smile. "Years of practice. And intense training."

Clarke wrapped her arms around Lexa's waist, and Lexa lovingly kissed her forehead. Before she knew it, Raven had sprung up from her rock and was squeezing both Clarke and Lexa tightly. Of course, the other three could not resist joining in, and Lexa wrapped her arms around anyone she could reach. Normally she would hate being held so tightly against so many other people, but she found she didn't mind it when it was these particular people. She was so glad she had met Clarke because with her beautiful girlfriend came these wonderful people that she had started to call her own friends, and that was all she really wanted after all.

Octavia was the first to pull away. "So tell me the details. You guys had sex, right? I know you had sex."

Lexa felt her face flush a deep shade of red, and she knew that she had just given away the answer right then and there. However, it proved that it did not matter because Clarke told them anyway. "Of course we had sex. It's become like our nighttime ritual."

"Oh, great. Are we getting details?" Raven asked eagerly.

Clarke smacked her upside the head. "No, you're not getting details. What happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom."

Raven's face fell, and a mischievous smirk spread over Lexa's face as she decided to be bold. "I'll give you some. Clarke dressed up in my coat and declared herself the commander, and she made me be the Sky Girl."

Clarke's face turned scarlet when their friends began to laugh, and that was enough to make Lexa want to keep going.

"Griffin's getting kinky with it, huh?" Raven couldn't help but say.

"Yes, she wouldn't even let me touch her, and she made me strip down completely while she refused to take off her clothes—"

"And that's enough! We're leaving," Clarke said, pulling Lexa's arm to take her away from the group.

"See you tomorrow, guys. Thanks for the details, Lexa!" Octavia shouted, and Lexa winked at her.

Bellamy mouthed, "Good luck," in Lexa's direction, and she nodded to him, knowing that she might need it after what she had done. She couldn't tell if Clarke was actually mad at her for sharing details of their sex life or not, but she decided to be safe.

"I do not understand what I was doing wrong, Clarke. I was just answering Raven's question," Lexa said innocently.

Clarke did not fall for it. "I hate you."

"But I know that you love me," Lexa said, smiling.

Clarke did not answer, but the way she brought her hand down to intertwine her fingers with Lexa's was answer enough.

"Where are we going?" Lexa asked.

The frown on Clarke's face disappeared when she turned up to look at her girlfriend. "To the bedroom. This time, you can be the commander."

Lexa swallowed thickly when she saw the look in her girlfriend's eyes, and she nodded quickly in agreement. She began to walk faster after that, pulling her girlfriend along after her, eager to get to the bedroom. She knew she should check up with Aden and Indra to see how things had been going while she was away, but she suddenly decided that could wait as she fell into bed with the beautiful blond girl who had stolen her heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys all enjoyed this chapter! So, this story is coming to an end. I am planning on having only one more chapter in this story. If there is anything you absolutely want to see before this story ends feel free to leave a comment about it, and I will try to work it into the last chapter. Thank you to everyone who has continued to read this!


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Thursday, everyone! I can't believe that I am posting the last chapter of this story! It's going to feel so weird no longer posting this on Thursdays, and I will certainly miss it. Thank you guys for your ideas that you gave me for this chapter. I tried to incorporate each and every one into the chapter, and I hope it lives up to you guys' expectations. Thank you to everyone who has left kudos and comments on this story, and thank you all for the wonderful support you have given this fic over the past few months! I hope you all enjoy the last chapter!

One Month Later

Clarke reached up through the soft leaves to grab the shiny red apple that was hanging above her. She pulled it into her hand, breathing in the sweet scent, and she couldn't wait until she could bite into the juicy fruit.

"Clarke?" a voice sounded from below.

The blonde looked down to find Lexa staring up at her skeptically before looking pointedly into the basket she was holding. Clarke sighed as she threw the fruit down into the brunette's basket. "I'm sorry. It just looks so good."

Lexa smiled up at her. "I know, Clarke, but we will have plenty of time to eat them later."

Clarke nodded, looking around the tree one more time to make sure that there was no more fruit before beginning to make her slow descent. "I think that was the last one."

When Clarke dropped down next to Lexa, the brunette handed her the basket of apples before the two of them walked over to the next tree. This time, Lexa nimbly climbed up the tree to begin picking its apples while Clarke waited below to catch them in the basket. Clarke smiled as she looked behind her at Octavia and Raven, who were doing the same at their own tree, as were Lincoln and Bellamy. Raven and Bellamy had volunteered to help harvest the apples today, and their friends were quick to offer their help as well. Even Lexa agreed to come along and help because she was not busy, so after Octavia's training session with Indra, the six of them came over to help the farmers of Polis to pick the apples that were ready to be harvested. Clarke was so glad they were finally in a time of peace because that meant that Lexa had a lot more free time and could help with simple activities like this while hanging out with her friends. The blonde was also quite happy that Lexa got along so well with her friends, that they were able to become this small little family that Clarke had grown to love so much.

Clarke was broken out of her reverie when she heard a crack above her. She barely had time to drop her basket of apples to the side before a falling Lexa crashed into her, pinning her to the ground. The blonde was simply glad that they missed the mud that was still in some places due to yesterday's rain.

"Lexa, are you okay?" Clarke asked, immediately worried that her girlfriend had gotten hurt.

Lexa pulled back to look at Clarke in concern. "I am fine, considering you broke my fall. I'm so sorry, Clarke. Are _you_ alright?"

Clarke brought her hand up to run through Lexa's hair. "I'm perfectly alright. You should've seen your face though when you were falling." Clarke snickered, thinking back to the look of shock and alarm that Lexa had when she fell. Lexa laughed along with Clarke, seemingly admitting that it must have been rather funny, and Clarke reveled in the beautiful sound for a moment before trying to push Lexa, who seemed to think that it was okay to permanently reside atop of Clarke, off of her.

"Get _off_ , Lexa!" Clarke groaned.

"Sorry." Lexa rolled off of her, blushing a bit.

Clarke allowed Lexa to pull her to her feet before deciding to tease the brunette. "Do you think that you can handle not falling this time? Or should I be the climber from now on?"

Lexa huffed. "I can do it."

Clarke chuckled at her girlfriend's pout. "I thought you were supposed to be Trikru."

Lexa rolled her eyes. "I am, Clarke. It is just that I have not climbed many trees since becoming the commander."

"Then how come I can do it?" Clarke shot back.

Lexa gave her a knowing look. "I know you train with Octavia sometimes when I am preoccupied with something else, and I also believe I heard Indra talking about giving her tree-climbing lessons last week."

Clarke cracked a smile. "Fine. You got me."

Lexa surprised her by pressing a kiss to her lips, but before she could even return it, Lexa was pulling herself back into the tree. Clarke grabbed the basket as Lexa started throwing the apples down to her again, and she couldn't help herself as she pulled one out and began to eat it. She almost moaned in pleasure as the flavor burst onto her tongue, and the rich juice flooded over her taste buds. She was brought out of her apple paradise when she felt something wet and sticky hit the side of her arm.

She turned around to see Raven laughing at her from her place at the tree behind Clarke. "Hey, Griffin, you can't eat those now. That's not fair!"

Clarke looked in shock at the mud that was now dripping down her arm. "Seriously, Reyes? You'll pay for that one."

Clarke tossed her unfinished apple aside before she carefully set down the basket, figuring that Lexa could hopefully still get the apples inside on her own. Then, she bent down to grab a huge glob of mud off the ground, lobbing it at Raven. The other girl ducked out of the way, and unluckily for Clarke, this was the exact moment that Octavia decided to drop down from the tree she had been in, taking the mud square in the chest. She looked up at Clarke in confusion. "What the hell, Clarke?"

"That was meant for Raven," Clarke explained.

"Oh, it's on now." Octavia bent down to grab some mud for herself, throwing it in Clarke's direction. Clarke took off running, only pausing to grab some mud to throw back at her. Soon enough, Bellamy and Lincoln had noticed their little game, and Bellamy quickly shot some mud in his unsuspecting sister's direction. She turned around with a teasing grin. "You shouldn't have done that, Bell."

Since she was watching the Blake siblings, Clarke almost didn't see the mud that Lincoln had thrown at her, but she sidestepped just in time, turning to throw some back at him. When she noticed Lexa jump down from the tree she was in to watch them curiously, she walked over to her girlfriend and smeared the mud right across the brunette girl's face, laughing at the way her face scrunched up in surprise. "You forgot your warpaint."

Dismayed green eyes sprang open to settle on blue. "Clarke!"

Clarke gave Lexa a handful of mud. "Come on, Lexa. Live a little."

Lexa smiled at Clarke, making as if to throw the mud at her, so the blonde proceeded to run what she assumed was a safe distance away. When she turned back to look at Lexa, she found the brunette smearing her mud into the curly hair of an unsuspecting Bellamy. The boy was prepared though, and Clarke laughed aloud when he quickly turned and streaked the big handful of mud he was already holding through Lexa's hair before she could get away.

"Bellamy! It will take me forever to get this out," Lexa whined, pawing at the mud that was now caking her intricately braided hair. Clarke stifled a smirk at the fact that the brunette was just rubbing it in further.

Bellamy only shrugged. "You should've thought of that before you put it in _my_ hair, Lexa."

Lexa grumbled to herself before grabbing another handful of mud and going after Raven. Clarke was brought back into the fight when she felt someone shove mud down the back of her shirt. She shrieked, spinning around to toss her mud into Octavia's face. The other girl ducked away though, and Clarke raced after her, intending to get her back before this mud war ended. Clarke smiled to herself as she ran though. She loved days like this.

* * *

Clarke and her friends trekked up the riverbank, walking along the worn path that led back to Polis. The six of them had just gotten done rinsing off the traces of their mud war in the river. Clarke had tried her best to wash all of the mud out of her girlfriend's hair, but she could still see traces of it in the commander's brunette locks as the blonde trailed behind her. Suddenly, Raven was stepping up beside her, wiping at her arm. "You missed a bit of mud."

"You were the one that put it there." Clarke shrugged her off.

"Oh, sorry. I forgot I'm not supposed to touch you, Commander. I am just a mere Sky Girl," Raven said with a teasing glint in her eyes. Clarke groaned. Raven was never going to let that go. Ever since Lexa had told her about it, Raven had found a way to tease Clarke about it almost every day. Clarke hoped that if she just stayed quiet, the teasing would stop, but she had no such luck. "Would you like me to strip naked for you as well?"

Clarke grabbed Lexa's arm, pulling her girlfriend back so that she could bury her blushing face into the brunette's coat. "Lexa, Raven's teasing me again." Clarke pouted when Lexa only chuckled in response, and she seriously considered telling Raven some of the things that Lexa had done in bed, but she knew that Raven would not tease the other girl as relentlessly as she teased the blonde because Lexa was a lot better at hiding her emotions, and therefore, Raven would not get the rise that she wanted.

"I'm tired," Clarke grumbled into her girlfriend's chest.

She was surprised when she felt herself being lifted off the ground seconds later, and she grinned happily, wrapping her arms around Lexa's shoulders and her legs around Lexa's waist as the commander began to carry her. Clarke rested her head against Lexa's shoulder, settling her face in the crook of the brunette's neck. "Thanks, Lex." She felt Lexa nod against her in answer.

"I'm tired too," Octavia said from behind Clarke and Lexa. "Give me a ride, Bell."

Clarke watched over Lexa's shoulder as Bellamy looked skeptically at his sister. "Seriously, O?"

"Please," Octavia begged. "Clarke's getting one."

"Fine," Bellamy relented. "Hop on."

Octavia clung tightly to her brother as he lifted her up onto his back and continued walking. Raven scoffed at Octavia and Clarke. "Why do I have to walk? I'm the one with the bad leg."

"Get on my back," Lexa offered.

Clarke pulled back to look at her girlfriend in concern. "No, Lexa. That's too much weight for you."

Lexa raised her eyebrows at the blonde. "I am strong, Clarke. I can handle it."

Lexa knelt down to allow Raven to easily climb onto her back. Raven hooked her legs over Clarke's before squeezing Lexa's shoulders to let the other girl know she was situated. Then, Lexa pushed off the ground, teetering a little before continuing on the long trudge back to Polis.

* * *

Later that evening, Clarke and Lexa were sitting in a proper bath to make sure that they were fully washed for dinner. They had already been sitting in the water for five minutes, neither one of them moving to start bathing, simply enjoying the feel of the warm water flowing over their skin. Clarke also found herself enjoying the feel of her girlfriend pressed against her back.

"Can we just sit here?" Clarke finally asked, even though that's what they had been doing for the past five minutes. "We have plenty of time before dinner."

She felt Lexa nod against her, and she leaned her head back against her girlfriend's chest. Lexa kissed the top of her head, and then the two of them sat in comfortable silence. Clarke was almost lulled to sleep by the warm temperature of the water against her bare skin, and she realized how content she was in this life that she now had.

"I love being here in Polis, Lexa. It makes me wonder how I could've ever called anywhere else my home. I love Polis, and I love you. I think I've been falling slowly for you since the day we met," Clarke said softly, tracing gentle circles on Lexa's forearm where it rested against her waist.

"As have I, my love." Lexa placed a kiss on Clarke's cheek. "Although I am not falling so slowly anymore."

Clarke smiled. "Me neither, Lex. Me neither."

* * *

After dinner that night, Clarke and Lexa spent a little more time with their friends before retiring to their own room. Clarke instantly flopped down on the bed and closed her eyes, feeling tired, but she opened her eyes again when she did not feel the dip of the bed beside her that she was expecting from Lexa's added weight. She sat up in confusion to see Lexa standing nervously in the middle of the room. She immediately got up to stand in front of her girlfriend, reaching a hand out to rest comfortingly upon Lexa's arm. "What is it, Lexa? What's wrong?"

Lexa didn't even answer. She just got down swiftly onto one knee, and Clarke's eyebrows raised in surprise. She watched as Lexa pulled a ring out of her coat. It was a small ring made of polished wood that she had clearly gotten from one of the vendors in the marketplace, but it was what was on this ring that made Clarke's heart swell even more than the gesture. Carved onto the face of the ring was the shape of a heart, the same shape that she had taught Lexa months ago when she couldn't speak so that she could say she loved Clarke too.

"Clarke, I am very much in love with you, and I would like to spend every day for the rest of my life with you, if you will have me," Lexa said, looking up at Clarke with big green eyes. "Will you marry me?"

Clarke was sure she was about to burst with happiness at that moment. "Yes! Of course I will."

Lexa gently slid the ring onto Clarke's finger and then Clarke was pulling her to her feet, kissing her deeply. The kiss was full of passion and love, but it was not heated. It was a slow kiss. A kiss that showed that the two of them now truly believed that they had all the time in the world. Clarke pulled back, eyes still shining with joy, and she wiped at the tears that had fallen from Lexa's eyes. "Where did you learn about these Skaikru traditions?"

"I talked to Bellamy about it, and he told me exactly the way that a Sky Person would propose to a significant other. He even went with me when I had the ring designed," Lexa explained.

"I'll have to remember to thank him later. I love you so much, Lexa, and I cannot wait to be your wife." Clarke grabbed a fistful of brunette curls, pulling Lexa's lips to hers again.

"I love you too," Lexa got out between kisses.

* * *

Clarke and Lexa decided that they wished to get married as soon as they could, so a few days after their engagement, they set out for Arkadia, riding out to tell Abby of the news themselves. They planned to stay in Arkadia for a day or two before they headed back to get ready for the wedding, so their four friends rode along with them. When the six of them arrived at the gate, Raven, Octavia, Bellamy, and Lincoln waited for Clarke and Lexa outside while they wandered to the medical bay in search of Abby. Sure enough, the older woman was there, tending to one of her patients. She looked up at the new arrivals, and Clarke noticed the shock on her mother's face at the sight of them.

"What are you doing here? Is everything alright?" Abby asked, heading over to them.

Clarke smiled at her in reassurance. "Of course. We are just here to invite you back to Polis because Lexa and I are getting married."

Abby looked shocked for a moment before a warm smile spread across her face. "That's wonderful news. I'm so happy for you two."

She pulled Clarke into a hug, and Clarke held tightly to her mother, trying not to let her happy tears fall. Abby already had tears trailing down her face. "I can't believe my baby's getting married."

Clarke chuckled. "Neither can I, Mom."

Abby pulled back and then moved to pull Lexa into a hug as well, and Clarke watched on, happy that her mother had become so approving of this woman that Clarke loved more than life itself. When Abby had released the commander, she turned back to look at both of the girls, and Clarke didn't think she'd ever seen her mother look so happy. "I will definitely come back to Polis with you. I wouldn't miss this for the world."

* * *

Later that night, Clarke, her mother, and her friends were sitting around a fire, talking and laughing as they ate dinner. It was going rather well until Abby started sharing stories from Clarke's childhood. The blonde didn't think her face had been its normal color since her mother had started, and she wondered if it were possible for her face to remain a permanent shade of red.

"And don't get me started on the days I used to bring Clarke in to work with me," Abby was saying. "Whenever Jake and I were both busy, Clarke would come in and stay in my office in the medical center. Well, when she got to be about six or seven, I made her her own miniature lab coat that she could wear, and she would go around to my patients with a stethoscope and pretend to listen to their heartbeat. Then, she would tell them everything was fine, or if she decided it wasn't, she would tell them the things they needed to do to get better."

Raven turned to look at Clarke with an amused expression. "So you were bossy even as a child?"

Clarke groaned. "Mom, that's enough. My friends don't need to hear any more embarrassing stories of me as a kid."

Lexa kissed the top of her head. "I think you were a very cute child."

Raven nudged Clarke's side. "Yeah, Clarke, you have adorable childhood stories. At least you didn't grow up with no father and a mother who was always drunk off her ass. I would be dead right now if it weren't for Finn."

Octavia stared pointedly at all of them. "At least you didn't have to practically live under the floor and only ever see one room for the first sixteen years of your life."

Everyone fell silent. Clarke didn't know what to say after that. Her friends had horrible lives before coming to the ground, and she was lucky that her terrors didn't really start until a few months before they landed. She was just grateful that these terrors had now seemingly come to an end for all of them. With the Mountain Men dead, the Ice Nation under control, the City of Light destroyed, and the newfound peace with the grounders, it seemed that these terrors may just be over for good. Clarke smiled when she thought back to the way she had viewed the grounders when she first landed. She and the rest of her people had thought of these strange beings as savages, and Clarke would've never imagined back then that she would be about to marry their leader now.

Lexa finally broke the silence, looking around to everyone with a meaningful gaze. "I realize that some of you may not have had easy lives up until now, and I understand that. At the age of sixteen, in my Conclave, I was forced to kill the people that I had grown up with. Then, I had the burden of leading all of my people thrust upon my shoulders. I have faced many hardships, lost many people, as I know the rest of you have as well, and now that you have come together under my leadership, I hope that you will never have to face pain and hardship ever again. I will make sure that all of you are well-protected and well-fed, and I promise that you will always be free to do whatever you wish. I hope that now that you are on the ground and under my leadership, you will all finally get to live the lives that you deserve because I know that I could've never asked for anything better than having all of you in my life."

Clarke wrapped her arms around Lexa as everyone else murmured words of gratitude for their commander. She was so in love with the brunette, and she was really glad that Lexa had allowed herself to open up and become friends with these people who had become so important to Clarke. She saw that they were also rather important to Lexa now as well. At that moment, Bellamy raised up his drink. "To a new beginning."

The people sitting around the fire began to raise their drink as well, and Clarke followed suit, repeating his toast.

"And to the members of our lovely little family who are about to be married," he added, causing everyone to cheer as they repeated the words. Clarke dipped her head to Bellamy in thanks before she tilted back her drink, squeezing Lexa's hand as the brunette did the same.

* * *

Lexa pulled her hair over her shoulder, looking into the mirror to make sure she looked absolutely perfect. Hardly anything ever made the commander nervous anymore, but she was extremely nervous for her wedding with Clarke. She knew she was probably just being silly, but she really wanted everything to be perfect. She was wearing an elegant black dress with her usual red sash tied around her waist, and she kept her hair loose and flowing instead of in its traditional braids because she knew that Clarke liked it that way. She had wanted to wear her ceremonial warpaint, as was custom, but Clarke convinced her to keep her face clean, insisting that she be the one to wear the warpaint instead. Lexa hadn't seen Clarke since that morning, but she was about to see her again in fifteen minutes, and she had become more and more nervous as the time approached. She raked her hand through her hair and wished that it would simply be time so that she would not have to wait any longer.

Lexa looked up at the sound of someone entering the tent that she had been using to get ready, and she watched as Bellamy emerged, greeting her with a nod. She nodded back stiffly, and she knew that he could tell she was nervous because his face broke out in a smile. He walked over to her without a word and began to massage her shoulders soothingly, and she sunk into his touch, sighing at the way it relaxed her after she spent the entire morning being so uptight.

"I just got back from visiting Clarke. She's the same way you are," Bellamy said after a few minutes had gone by.

"Clarke is nervous as well?" Lexa furrowed her brow.

"Of course. It's her wedding day. I'd imagine it must be very nerve-racking, especially if it can turn the commander into a nervous wreck."

Lexa scoffed. "I am not a nervous wreck."

Bellamy met her eyes in the mirror with a knowing look. "You are, but that's okay, and I'll tell you the same thing I told her. Relax. You two love each other, and that's all that really matters. Even if you mess up, you'll still be married, so really it doesn't matter what happens today as long as the both of you are sure you want to go through with this."

Lexa nodded. "I am. I have never been surer of anything in my life. Is she?"

"Do you even have to ask that question?"

Lexa let out a breath. "I suppose not."

Bellamy gave Lexa's shoulders a quick squeeze before removing his hands altogether. "Then get out there and marry your girl."

Lexa gave him a huge smile, pulling him into a hug. "Thank you, Bellamy."

"Anytime, Lexa." He pulled away, returning her smile. "Now go."

Lexa walked out of the tent and over to the area where the ceremony would be taking place. A raised platform had been set up in the center square of Polis, and Lexa took her position at the bottom of it to wait for Clarke to join her. Soon after Lexa took her place, Clarke emerged from her own tent, dressed in the Skaikru's traditional white, but her hair was done up in braids, and she had lines of warpaint under her eyes. She took Abby's arm, and her mother walked her down the aisle. Lexa had learned that it was traditional for the bride's father to walk her down the aisle, but as Clarke's father was no longer living, her mother stood in to do it. When they reached Lexa, Abby handed Clarke off to her, kissing her daughter and then the commander on the cheek before taking her place amongst the large crowd that had gathered to watch their Heda get married. Clarke and Lexa walked up to take their places on the platform, facing one another in front of Denara, the woman who oversaw the binding ceremonies in Polis. Lexa found herself lost in Clarke's eyes as Denara greeted the crowd, speaking some words about the two girls and the significance of the ceremony that was about to be performed. Lexa couldn't help but smile proudly at the fact that she was about to become the first commander to ever get married.

The two of them decided to use a mix of Skaikru and Trikru customs, agreeing to do the binding that was typical of Trikru ceremonies, but say the words that were typical to Skaikru. When it was time for the binding, Lexa stepped in closer so that her body was flush against Clarke's, and Denara wound a rope around them, tying them together at the waist to symbolize the fact that they were becoming one. Lexa kept her eyes on Clarke's as they each recited the Skaikru vows that they had rehearsed the previous day. Then, Denara was asking Clarke if she took the commander to be her wife, and Lexa had to stop her happy tears from falling when the blond girl said, "I do."

Then, it was Lexa's own turn, and she barely heard the words that came out of the woman's mouth, knowing that she would swear her life to Clarke for eternity and so much longer. "Do you, Lexa kom Trikru, Heda of the thirteen clans, take Clarke Griffin of the Skaikru, legendary Wanheda, to be your wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish her till death do you part?"

"I do," Lexa said confidently.

Denara smiled widely. "Then it is my honor to now pronounce you to be wives. You may now kiss."

Lexa did not need to be told twice. She leaned forward the short distance to kiss her new wife, and she honestly didn't even hear the cheers that went up in the crowd until she pulled away. Once their lips were no longer attached, they couldn't tear their eyes away from each other while Denara removed the rope from around their waists now that they were officially bound. Lexa couldn't believe that this day had finally come, that she was Clarke's and Clarke was hers forever, and she knew that she would enjoy every minute for the rest of her life now that she knew that this blond girl who meant everything to her would be there to share it. Lexa looked out over the crowd to see tears streaking down Abby's face and Octavia and Raven giving her a thumbs up. Bellamy caught her eye, smiling widely, and nodded to her, and she easily nodded back, knowing that the smile on her face was probably wider than his. Then, she turned back to Clarke, to the blue eyes she loved so much, and pulled her in for another kiss, reveling in the way the world slipped away.

* * *

Six Years Later

She giggled as her grandmother finished her last braid, running her hand over her hair to make sure the braids felt right. She nodded in satisfaction when she felt that the hairstyle was close enough to the one that she was so used to wearing every single day. Her nomon normally braided her hair and sometimes her mother even braided it, but her mom was sick this morning, and Nomon stayed in to take care of her, so the little girl had spent the morning hours with her grandmother.

"Did I get your hair right, Kora?" her grandmother asked.

Kora smiled brightly at her. "Yes. It's just like Nomon does it."

"Good," Abby said.

"Will Mommy be better soon?" Kora asked, knowing that her grandma was a healer.

"I hope so, sweetie." Abby placed a light kiss on Kora's cheek. "You should be getting to training though. I love you."

"Love you too, Grandma," Kora said happily, kissing her on the cheek before leaving the healer's tent, where she had spent the morning with her grandma. She walked along the crowded street on her way to the training grounds. Many people greeted her along the way, and she politely dipped her head to them, walking through the city that she was told would all be hers someday.

"Kora, would you like a necklace?" A vendor from a jewelry stand asked her before holding one up. "I think this one would look beautiful on you."

"No, thank you," Kora politely refused. "I'm going to train right now."

"Okay, young warrior. Fight well." He bowed to her.

Kora continued on her way, refusing other gifts as well. Her nomon told her that she could accept anything she wanted, but she had never seen her mother accept a single gift unless she traded something for it, and Nomon rarely accepted gifts as well. When she finally reached the training clearing, her friends from the village, Trena, Sarellah, and Jaymie were already waiting for her. At first, Trena and Sarellah had been a bit shy around her since she was the Heda's daughter, but they had quickly grown to realize she was no different than them. Her best friend Jaymie had never been afraid of her since they had basically grown up together because their parents were friends.

"Hey, guys." Kora bounded into the clearing.

"Yes, Kora, you're here! Ready to train?" Trena asked excitedly.

"Yes. Do you know what we're learning today?" Kora grabbed her wooden sword from where she had left it the previous day at the edge of the clearing.

"Nope, but we can practice while we wait," Jaymie said, twirling his own sword in his small hand.

"No need. I'm here now, so we can start the lesson." Kora's Uncle Aden made his way into their small training area. "I was helping Heda with a few things."

"What are we doing today, Uncle Aden?" Kora asked with excited green eyes.

Aden smiled at the little warriors gathered around him. "First, I want each of you to attack me separately so that I can assess the skills that you've learned so far, and then we can play War."

"Yes! War!" Sarellah squealed.

Kora's eyes lit up at the prospect of War. It was one of the many games that Aden had created for them to play. They would split up into two teams and place two sticks at each end of the clearing. Then, they would start in the middle and try to get to the other team's stick. It was a game that all four of them enjoyed a lot.

"I want to be on Kora's team," Jaymie announced.

"Of course, Jay," Kora said, ruffling the younger boy's dark brown hair.

Aden looked around at all of them. "Alright, who wants to go first?"

* * *

Lexa made her way down to the training grounds. She had just finished dealing with news of a border skirmish on the edge of the Desert Clan's territory. A few clanless warriors attacked there and had apparently been providing trouble for a few days, so Lexa had to send some of her warriors out to help them deal with it. It was no major problem, and she knew it would be dealt with in a manner of days, but it still took up a bit of her time. When she reached the training grounds, she saw the four young kids playing the War game that Aden had created for them. She knew the kids loved it, and she smiled at the sight of the young man that was sitting on the rocks watching them as she walked over to join him. She still couldn't believe that Aden was twenty years old. It seemed like only yesterday that he had just arrived in Polis to train under Lexa at the mere age of ten.

"How did they do today?" Lexa asked, making her presence known.

Aden turned to face her. "They're doing great actually. I tested them each today with the easy moves I have been teaching them, and they all seem to have the hang of it, even little Sarellah."

Lexa smiled at the mention of the two-year-old girl, the youngest in the village. She was currently chasing after Jaymie, who seemed to have gotten past her defenses. Sarellah reminded Lexa of herself, as she had started training at the mere age of two as well. Only as a natblida, Lexa's training had been much more serious. Lexa had been very happy to discover that her daughter had night blood as well, which meant that she would be the first Heda that had an heir. This meant that there would be no Conclave after her death, which Lexa was relieved about. If her death was untimely, Clarke or Aden would simply take over until Kora was old enough to hold the throne. Lexa was also relieved that being Heda was a lot less of a burden now that the Mountain Men were dead and all thirteen clans were united peacefully. She felt proud to think that she and Clarke had made it so that Kora would be able to lead easily when it became her time. With the way things were going, there was no threat to Lexa's life, and she was really happy to think that she would most likely be the first Heda to step down from the throne of old age rather than death. She was brought out of her thoughts when Aden spoke again. "Did you get everything sorted out with the Desert Clan ambassador?"

"Yes, I sent him back with some of our warriors to help them deal with the problem they've been having. It should be easily taken care of," Lexa reported.

"I am glad to hear that. Have you come to watch the intense battle?" Aden asked, amusement sparkling in his eyes.

"Yes. I enjoy watching the children play. It is rather refreshing to see such innocent people, excited by the cute little war games you made up for them," Lexa said, smiling.

It was true. Watching the small children run around playing their little training games was relaxing and fun for her. It wouldn't be long before they became seconds and their training became much more serious. She couldn't believe that her daughter was already four years old. It seemed like only yesterday that she had been born. Lexa had been overjoyed when Abby's procedure worked, and she found out that she was going to have a child. The commander was also quite glad when Abby moved to Polis herself shortly after, leaving Marcus in charge of the Skaikru. Lexa did not know much of anything about medical procedures, but somehow, with the Skaikru's amazing technology, Abby was able to take bone marrow from Lexa for a procedure that would produce a child with both her and Clarke's DNA, and the commander was in awe that they were able to have a daughter that was both of theirs, something that had been previously unheard of.

Lexa loved her little girl so much more than she ever thought possible. She was the spitting image of Clarke with light blond hair and the same facial structure, but her eyes were a bright green, resembling Lexa's own eyes. Kora also seemed to have Lexa's personality, to Clarke's chagrin. Clarke had taken to helping Nyko and her mother when she was not fulfilling her duties as Hedatu, and she had tried to teach Kora how to be a healer as well, but Kora wouldn't hear it, wanting to be a warrior like Nomon. Clarke didn't like it, but she finally agreed that she would allow Kora to become a second when she turned five, the typical age that kids in the village were taken on as seconds. Kora wanted to train now though, so Aden had come up with some fighting games she could play with the other small children of the village. A couple weeks ago, he even began teaching them some basic fight moves, which Clarke didn't know about, and Lexa hoped that it would remain that way. Kora loved playing training games with the other children every afternoon, especially since Jaymie had agreed to do it too. Jaymie was Octavia and Lincoln's three-year-old son, and he and Kora were the best of friends. Clarke and Octavia had always been afraid that they wouldn't get along, so the two girls were relieved when their children became so close.

Aden turned to Lexa with a serious expression, so Lexa turned her full attention to him, raising her eyebrows to invite him to speak. "Lexa, I want you to know that when Kora is of age, I would really love to take her on as my second. You taught me so much, and I loved every training session. Now, I would like to repay the favor by training your daughter."

Lexa dipped her head in gratitude, showing that she approved. "Aden, there is no one else I would trust her with. I was going to ask you to be her mentor when the time came."

Aden nodded. "Thank you, Lexa. I promise I'll take great care of her."

Lexa smiled warmly. "I know you will."

Just then, a small blond ball of energy was running for Lexa, shouting, "Nomon!" and Lexa bent down to pick her daughter up into her arms and place kisses on her cheek.

"How's my little warrior doing today?" Lexa cooed in a tone that she saved only for her daughter.

"I fought so good today, Nomon. Tell her, Uncle Aden." Kora twisted in Lexa's arms to face her uncle.

"Kora is shaping up to be a great warrior." Aden smiled in the little girl's direction.

Kora turned back to Lexa excitedly. "Did you hear that, Nomon? He said I'm going to be the best warrior ever."

Lexa tried her best to suppress her laugh. "I have no doubt that you will be."

"Tomorrow, we're gonna—" Kora broke off as her eyes lit up, seemingly spotting something over Lexa's shoulder, before exclaiming, "Mommy!"

Lexa looked around, and sure enough, there was Clarke, carefully making her way down to meet them. Lexa glanced worriedly at her wife, but although Clarke looked a little pale still, she looked much better than she had that morning. When she arrived at Lexa's side, she reached out her arms for their daughter, and Lexa happily transferred Kora into her wife's arms. "How was training, baby?"

"Great! I'm gonna be the bestest warrior ever," Kora told her.

"I know, baby, I know," Clarke said, hugging her daughter tight.

"Are you feeling better, my love?" Lexa asked, her concern playing out on her face.

"Yes, Lex. I wouldn't be here if I wasn't." Clarke smiled up at her, and Lexa leaned over to kiss her wife's cheek.

"No, Nomon. Kiss me." Kora giggled, grabbing Lexa by the chin and pulling her face over to kiss her cheek. Lexa smiled brightly as she blew raspberries against her daughter's cheek instead.

Kora shrieked, pulling away from her. "That's not kisses, silly. Like this." Kora demonstrated by kissing Clarke's cheek, and the older blonde kissed her daughter right back, causing Kora to smile happily. "See. Mommy knows."

Clarke raised her eyebrows with a teasing grin. "See, Nomon? It seems I am smarter than you."

"Remind me which one of us is the Heda again," Lexa said, teasing the other girl right back.

"You're the Heda, Nomon, because you're the greatest warrior ever," Kora answered before Clarke could, "but I'm gonna be Heda someday too, and I'm gonna be the bravest, fiercest, smartest Heda in the whole Polis."

"Heda doesn't just rule over Polis, sweetie. She rules over all the clans," Clarke explained.

"I know, but the Heda lives in Polis, and so will I, and I'm gonna be just as smart and strong as you are, Nomon," Kora promised.

"Those are not the only things you should be. Do you remember the third pillar of the commander?" Lexa questioned.

"Comassin," Kora answered.

"Yes. Compassion," Lexa calmly said, "and that is the most important one. You must be good and kind to lead your people. That way, they know that they can look up to you and that you will always try your best to keep them safe."

"I will keep them all safe. I will be nice to everyone like you, Nomon, and like Mommy. Anyone who needs my help. Doesn't matter if they are my people or not. If they are nice too, I will help them," Kora said sincerely while playing with the ends of Clarke's blond hair.

"Just when I thought you were taking after me, you go and say something that sounds so much like Mommy." Lexa smiled at her daughter.

Clarke looked knowingly at Lexa. "You'd do the same, Lexa. You have. You just refuse to say it."

At that moment, Jaymie came running over, and Kora scrambled out of Clarke's arms to meet him. He immediately grabbed her hand, pulling her out of the training area. "Come on. Let's go find my mommy and daddy, and we can go to dinner."

Kora nodded in agreement, and Jaymie stopped, turning back to look up at Lexa and her wife. "You coming, Auntie Lessa and Auntie Clarke?"

Lexa looked to Clarke, who nodded to the little boy in front of her. "Of course, Jaymie. We'd love to come."

Lexa turned to say goodbye to Aden. "It looks like I will see you later, Aden."

Aden nodded to her, smiling. "Of course. Goodbye, Lexa."

As the two young children ran off in the direction of the tower, Clarke and Lexa trailed behind, figuring they would let the kids run off to find Octavia and Lincoln and simply meet them in the dining hall. Lexa allowed her gaze to drift back over to her wife. Each day, it was getting harder for her to miss the blonde's growing stomach, and Lexa would be lying if she said she wasn't still a little worried about the blonde since the girl had been so sick that morning. Lexa had spent the majority of the morning hours sitting in her bathroom, holding back her wife's blond hair. "Are you sure you're feeling better? You should be resting after the morning you had."

"Lexa, I'm fine, love. Don't worry about me. If I need to go lie down again, I'll let you know." Clarke entwined their hands together.

Lexa nodded. "Okay."

"So what did the Desert Clan ambassador want?" Clarke asked.

"Nothing major. Just to speak with me of a border skirmish. I've already sent some of my warriors to take care of it."

"I'm really glad our daughter's going to be able to grow up in a time of peace." Clarke looked over to catch Lexa's eye. "All because of you."

"I will admit I had a big role in it," Lexa said playfully before turning more serious, "but it is due to you as well, Clarke. If you hadn't defeated Mount Weather, we would not have this peace."

Clarke smiled at the thought. "I guess you're right. We both made a safer world for our daughter, and I hope that she will never have to face any of the terrible things that we had to go through."

"She will not, Clarke," Lexa promised, "because we will keep her safe. I love her, and I love you."

"Ai hod yu in seintaim, Leksa," Clarke responded, and a huge grin spread over Lexa's face as they pushed through the doors of the tower.

* * *

Jaymie and Kora came running into the dining hall with Octavia and Lincoln, and Lexa soon noticed that they brought Raven and Bellamy as well. Clarke and Lexa smiled at the sight of their other friends as they all sat down to eat their meal. Lexa pulled Kora into her lap because she was not tall enough to reach the table, and Octavia did the same for Jaymie as they all talked amicably while enjoying the food in front of them. Lexa smiled as she watched the raspberries disappear from her own plate and somehow end up on Kora's, and her smile only grew when she saw the same thing happen to Clarke soon after. It seemed that the commander wasn't the only one to take a liking to that particular fruit, but she was more than happy to give up her raspberries to the little girl who was sitting in her lap.

When they had all finished eating, Lexa could tell that Clarke was not feeling well again because when she felt Clarke lean against her shoulder, she looked down at her wife in question, and she could immediately detect the pain on the blond girl's face. Bellamy seemed to sense this as well because he was quick to step in. "Jaymie and Kora, do you guys want to go find Trena and Sarellah and go down to play in the lake?"

"Yes, please," Kora said, smiling, and Jaymie cheered his approval as well.

"Maybe while we're there, I'll build some small fireworks for you guys to watch." Raven invited herself along.

Clarke was quick to shoot down that idea. "You are not bringing my daughter anywhere near your fireworks."

The kids both looked disappointed at this verdict, but Raven turned her gaze to Lexa, and the commander winked subtly to let Raven know that she was fine to shoot off fireworks. Lexa was glad that Clarke was resting against her shoulder at that moment so that the blonde couldn't see her. She knew though that Raven would never actually let any of the children get close enough to the fireworks to get hurt, and she trusted the explosive-loving brunette enough to make sure the children stayed safe. Raven tried her best to stifle her smile.

* * *

Once Clarke and Lexa got upstairs, Clarke was quick to flop down onto the bed, sighing in relief as she closed her eyes. Lexa climbed in beside her, staring down at the blonde in concern. "What is wrong, ai hodnes?"

Clarke cracked an eye open to look at her wife. "Nothing too bad. I don't think I will be puking again tonight. I just feel a bit nauseous."

"Get some rest then. I will lay with you. At least until Kora comes back." Lexa stretched out onto her side to be more comfortable.

"I can't believe we're having another." Clarke placed her hand on her stomach.

"I am glad we are," Lexa said, smiling. "Maybe this one will look more like me."

"I hope so." Clarke's eyes shined with amusement. "I wouldn't mind having a mini Lexa running around."

"I thought Kora was enough of a mini-me. You are constantly saying that she acts exactly like me." A teasing smirk spread across Lexa's face. "Maybe our next child will look mostly like me, but will want to be a healer."

"One can only hope." The two of them were silent for a few moments before Clarke spoke again. "How did I get so lucky as to carry the Heda's child?"

"How did I get so lucky as to have the beautiful Sky Girl wish to have my children?" Lexa countered.

A smile turned up the corners of Clarke's lips. "I guess we're both lucky then."

Lexa smiled warmly at her wife before moving down on the bed. She nudged Clarke's hand away and pulled the blonde's shirt up so that she could place light kisses over the slight swell of the blonde's stomach. Lexa watched as Clarke turned her head down to look at the brunette with a loving smile. The corners of Lexa's own lips quirked up when she felt the blonde's fingers come up to play with her hair. After a minute or so, Lexa stopped her gentle kisses, and she pulled the blonde's shirt back down over her stomach as she laid out on her back on the bed, extending her arms to Clarke. Her wife slid right into her grasp, and Lexa looped an arm around the other girl, beginning to play with blond hair as Clarke had just been doing with the commander's own hair mere seconds ago. "Rest, my love." Lexa kissed her forehead. "I hope that you will feel better in the morning."

Clarke hummed in agreement, and Lexa could tell the blond girl was exhausted because within seconds, she was asleep. The brunette smiled down at her now peacefully sleeping wife, wondering how she had gotten so lucky as to be with this woman who she loved more than anything else in the world. After a while, she yawned, feeling herself begin to grow tired as well, and she figured she at least had time for a short nap before Bellamy, Raven, and the kids got back. She moved her hand to rest over her wife's stomach protectively, as she had taken to doing now while they slept, and only then did she finally allow herself to begin to fall asleep.


End file.
